re: Non-CIO Support Thread!!!

Yeah.. what's a D&D?? Anyway.. I used a combo of CIO and attachment. Only because there's no way around letting them CIO sometimes. Like if your DH has them hooked on taking sugary drinks at night. :/ But I believe I'm on my last baby (third) and will not use the CIO method. Not unless there's something up with my other kids. I always try to get to my kids ASAP when they need me. I've NEVER used CIO on an infant though. Not until almost a year.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Campos2:</b>" Yeah.. what's a D&D?? Anyway.. I used a combo of CIO and attachment. Only because there's no way ... [snip!] ... I always try to get to my kids ASAP when they need me. I've NEVER used CIO on an infant though. Not until almost a year. "</blockquote>




D&D= debate &.discuss.

Oh.. gotcha..  


Anyway.. if you don't want to use the CIO method. What do you do about a 2 yr old who has a tantrum at bedtime??

<blockquote><b>Quoting Campos2:</b>" Oh.. gotcha..   Anyway.. if you don't want to use the CIO method. What do you do about a 2 yr old who has a tantrum at bedtime?? "</blockquote>




Do you have a nightly routine? My son is 13months and daddy "walks him" to sleep. He won't be rocked or laid down. He has to be walked around in daddies arms. It depends on what works. It's okay to sit on he bed side and pat/rub her back and sing to her. what does she like? what are you trying to accomplish?

Quoting lil*Mama*Bear™:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Campos2:</b>" Oh.. gotcha..   Anyway.. if you don't want ... [snip!] ... It's okay to sit on he bed side and pat/rub her back and sing to her. what does she like? what are you trying to accomplish?"

Well it's hard.. I have a 4 year old and a 4 month old too.. My 4 year old does well most nights... and my 2 year old is still in the crib in my room due to lack of space. My 4 month old has a co sleeper bassinet in my room as well but he usually sleeps in my bed. My 2 year old has a bad temper. He screams and throws things when he doesn't get his way. He can talk.. but when he has a tantrum all he does is scream. It's like a guessing game figuring out what he wants. Tonight it ended up being a cup of water.. and once he had that he asked for a truck. It took nearly an hour of screaming to figure that out though.. Cause I'd go from tending to the baby to trying to calm my 2 year old. All he would do is point towards his sisters room so I fully believe he wanted to go play.... but the cup of water got him quiet. Idk. I love him so much... but I've got to get him to express himself better. He's typically my calm baby... til something doesn't go his way. My 4 year old is wild... but since she started school she's improved alot. Any advice?? How do you get them to express themselves without screaming?? How do you avoid bedtime tantrums when you have an infant to attend to as well??

<blockquote><b>Quoting Campos2:</b>" Well it's hard.. I have a 4 year old and a 4 month old too.. My 4 year old does well most nights... ... [snip!] ... them to express themselves without screaming?? How do you avoid bedtime tantrums when you have an infant to attend to as well??"</blockquote>




I will be there soon. My daughter will be here in a few days. Does he have the words to express how he feels? I would suggest to talk to him and let him know you understand his frustration. Wear the small one if that helps. honestly I haven't had my second so I can't say exactly what helps.

Yeah.. he has the words. He can say a surprising amount for his age.. in example:
'something drink'
'hurts'
'give me truck' (lol he's obsessed :p)
'go bye bye'
'diaper change'
'something eat'
'lovies' (hugs/kisses)
"give me that pillow"
'blanket'

He KNOWS how to say whatever he wants to say and he knows what they mean. It's so funny.. about a month ago both my older kids were on the trampoline.. and his big sister makes him fall when she's jumping... So he gets this cute mad look on his face and says "unh unh Sisi!! Make me fall!!" lol So I know he understands... but I wonder if it's possible that he may not be able to make connections words with meanings when he's upset. :/

<blockquote><b>Quoting Campos2:</b>" Yeah.. he has the words. He can say a surprising amount for his age.. in example: 'something drink' 'hurts' ... [snip!] ... but I wonder if it's possible that he may not be able to make connections words with meanings when he's upset. :/ "</blockquote>




I mean like feel feelings. I would work with him on talking about his feelings. Let him know it's okay to feel angry and you know it can be scary for him. Sympathize because he has these big feelings that he doesn't know how to control yet. Teach him how to control them by giving him choices on alternative ways to act rather than screaming. But sometimes they just need a good scream/cry. Doesn't it make you feel better sometimes?

Quoting lil*Mama*Bear™:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Campos2:</b>" Yeah.. he has the words. He can say a surprising ... [snip!] ... ways to act rather than screaming. But sometimes they just need a good scream/cry. Doesn't it make you feel better sometimes?"

Oooh.. gotcha. Never tried that before... but we'll see. :p

<blockquote><b>Quoting Campos2:</b>" Oooh.. gotcha. Never tried that before... but we'll see. :p"</blockquote>




It's not gonna be magic, so stay strong. if you get too upset yourself remove yourself and don't get angry at him. Have you tried wearing the littlest one? Like in a carrier? It worked well with my first so I could continue life and still comfort him and hold him.

Quoting lil*Mama*Bear™:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Campos2:</b>" Oooh.. gotcha. Never tried that before... but ... [snip!] ... the littlest one? Like in a carrier? It worked well with my first so I could continue life and still comfort him and hold him."

Wearing won't work.. he's being treated for clubfoot and has to wear braces 23/7. :/ Great suggestion though.... I did wear my 2 year old when he was an infant.

Quoting Campos2:" Oh.. gotcha..   Anyway.. if you don't want to use the CIO method. What do you do about a 2 yr old who has a tantrum at bedtime?? "

I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old. We do dinner, bath, then we sit on the couch and I rub their backs with lavender lotion until they pass out. If my 2 yo throws a fit I just hold him and listen to classical music in the dark.

My baby is 6 months and doesnt sleep through the night yet. I been trying everything to get her to. Nut the cry it out method is not one of them and never will be. I dont like her crying, just just breaks my heart, and seeing the tears is as far as it goes. I ALWAYS pick her up to put her back to sleep. I cant for the night she falls back to sleep. But this post just helps with not wanting to do that method, its so unfair to the babies. They dont know, and its not like they are spoiled. I was always told to let her stay fussy and not to get her right away. I do anyways, I dont want her to be fussy or to cry.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Elizabeth Winsor:</b>" My baby is 6 months and doesnt sleep through the night yet. I been trying everything to get her to. Nut ... [snip!] ... I was always told to let her stay fussy and not to get her right away. I do anyways, I dont want her to be fussy or to cry."</blockquote>


Good for you. My son is almost 14mo old and still doesn't sleep through the night. Some babies start very early. Others don't.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Elizabeth Winsor:</b>" My baby is 6 months and doesnt sleep through the night yet. I been trying everything to get her to. Nut ... [snip!] ... I was always told to let her stay fussy and not to get her right away. I do anyways, I dont want her to be fussy or to cry."</blockquote>



My youngest was 18 months before he slept through the night and still doesn't consistently at 2. My 4 yo has sleep issues and has only sttn a few times in his life.