re: Non-CIO Support Thread!!!

I must commend all you mamas. I'd go stark raving mad if I didn't do my own dumbed down version of CIO! Your ability to stick with it is insane!! I don't particularly like hearing Vincent cry when he's being a little pain in the butt (aka, just wants out of his crib to play and fight off sleep longer), but there is no way I could rock him or walk him to sleep, or even drive him to sleep, because he just refuses to be held then! And that includes being "held" by the carseat...he's too independent by nature (even at a couple months old, he'd cry to be put down if he thought he was being held too much!! :p ). I completely agree that I would never be able to let Vincent cry till he threw up. You can tell so much by their cries, especially when they're too mad to wind down on their own.

I'm so glad I haven't had to ever consider CIO.

Quoting BG Biatch {FSC}:“ I'm so glad I haven't had to ever consider CIO.”

We've only really been doing our version of it for the past...maybe 3 or 4 months? He's a pretty mature kiddo, though, so he was ready for it. And it's rarely that bad, but we're lucky in that. He's only really bad when sick or teething. Or refusing to believe he's tired.  

For those who are anti-cio and still having sleep issues with your LO, I just wanted to say that the past week or so I have been getting my LO to take two naps per day. As soon as she starts acting sleepy I lay down and nurse her, cuddle, etc until she is good and asleep. We do not get up until she takes a good 1-2 hour nap, once in the morning and once in the afternoon. Then I put her to bed BY 8 pm, sometimes as early as 7, same routine.

She has been so much happier AND sleeping BETTER at night. She doesn't get up until about 7 am even with the extra naps and she doesn't wake as much at night. It's been some work, but she is getting used to it now and we are both much happier, and I'm less tired for sure and all of it without CIO.

It's worth a try for those who are having problems.

Quoting summerbabyX2:“ CIO does not cause brain damage. Some studies suggest "letting" a child cry for more than 15 minutes ... [snip!] ... with my child, I'll comfort him. Just wondering, where will you draw the line? Will you still rock your 3 year old to sleep??”

I think this was really meant to be a support thread. If somebody made a CIO support thread I wouldn't go into it and tell everybody how wrong and smurfed up I thought they were.

Quoting "The Boob" [HM] [EBFB]:“ I think this was really meant to be a support thread. If somebody made a CIO support thread I wouldn't go into it and tell everybody how wrong and smurfed up I thought they were.”

in NO way am I saying you're wrong for not CIO. I just don't think you should say that other moms are causing brain damage to their children if they do CIO. Each mom does what she feels is right for her child and we need to support one another

Quoting summerbabyX2:“ in NO way am I saying you're wrong for not CIO. I just don't think you should say that other moms are ... [snip!] ... damage to their children if they do CIO. Each mom does what she feels is right for her child and we need to support one another”

But again, I would not go into a CIO support thread and push my views or give a smurf what the OP said for that matter. It's a support thread for like-minded mothers, so if you disagree why are you here? Makes no sense to me.

Quoting summerbabyX2:“ in NO way am I saying you're wrong for not CIO. I just don't think you should say that other moms are ... [snip!] ... damage to their children if they do CIO. Each mom does what she feels is right for her child and we need to support one another”

Unless I am mistaken, which is always possible, the study that stated that crying caused brain damage dealt with children who were crying so long and so hard that it was actually causing oxygen deprivation. Now, it is entirely possible that the children in this study had other medical issues as well (though if it was a well-done study, that shouldn't have been the case, or at least, there should have been no diagnosed issues that would mess up the data); however, I do not believe the OP was saying that CIO definitely causes brain damage, just simply giving some support to those who choose not to. I chose to do a variation of CIO because I knew that my mental health would decline if I were to choose to not CIO, and that would lead to being less able to care for my son. In my case, I felt that was the right decision. So if some mamas choose to not CIO for fear of brain damage occuring, no matter how likely or not, I don't think that it should be construed as bashing CIO moms; it's simply support for those mamas who chose to not CIO based on that particular fact: that crying for extended periods of time CAN cause brain damage due to oxygen deprivation.

I have a question? Do you consider it CIO if you are holding the child and comforting them?

Quoting seattlemama3 *NMD*:“ I have a question? Do you consider it CIO if you are holding the child and comforting them?”

Nope, I call that "In-Arms Crying". I think that is therapeutic actually. Like crying in the arms of any loved one.

Quoting summerbabyX2:“ in NO way am I saying you're wrong for not CIO. I just don't think you should say that other moms are ... [snip!] ... damage to their children if they do CIO. Each mom does what she feels is right for her child and we need to support one another”

The topic title says "For those who are non-CIO". Since you are not "non-CIO" why did you even come in here?

In my opinion it is damaging for a child to CIO. But guess what? I don't go into pro-CIO threads because those mom's have their own ideas too.

Quoting Punk Rock Princess {EBFB}:“ Nope, I call that "In-Arms Crying". I think that is therapeutic actually. Like crying in the arms of any loved one.”

I guess I'm curious because now my son is waking in the middle of the night only because he needs my nipple to sleep! So I am considering holding him and rocking him while he cries it worked with my daughter!

Quoting seattlemama3 *NMD*:“ I guess I'm curious because now my son is waking in the middle of the night only because he needs my ... [snip!] ... because he needs my nipple to sleep! So I am considering holding him and rocking him while he cries it worked with my daughter!”

My son nurses a lot at night...we're planning on night weaning him when he turns 18 months old. *sigh* I hope it's that easy. ;)

all I can say is             

My SO and I were getting so much crap from his family about cosleeping and not letting Autumn CIO. They would tell us she would never learn to self soothe and that she will never be independent because we were "spoiling" her. Im glad that i dont let her CIO because i know shes crying for a reason. When she is whining i let her whine because after a couple minutes she forgets why she was whining but when she is actually crying is when i pick her up and rock her. This thread made me feel alot better about us being non-CIO parents.