So a friend confided in me something I find repugnant

And I don't know how to react towards it.


So, this guy that I have known and been friends with since 1997(he is married with two kids and another kid on the way in two weeks) confided in me yesterday that he has been seeing a woman outside of his marriage. This kind of threw me for a loop because I never would have expected it from him, since he has been a model family man and has always been such a nice guy.

His wife is and has been a stone cold bitch to him for ages, but that is no excuse. I told him flat out that I think it is wrong and that he should watch his step lest he risk losing his family and his relationship with his babies. He is not listening to me though, and I know that I am not going to be able to change his mind...he has it pretty much set on trying to be happy by cheating. I told him that I am still his friend no matter what, but I don;t condone it.

I wouldn't say anything to his wife since I do not personally know her, however I feel gross knowing his secret. I told him to at least wear protection and be careful, and he kind of laughed at me. I think he is playing Russian roulette with his life right now...what should I say to him other than what I already have?

I think the main reason this skeeves me out so much is because it makes me doubt relationships and marriages in general...I mean if the very last person I ever thought would cheat on his wife IS cheating on his wife...than what does that say about other peoples relationships, even my own with my husband. What if I was just blissfully unaware...and something was going on? I would be devastated.

It sounds like he hasn't been happy for years though. Even the nicest guys get fed up with crap. I think he's choosing a poor choice by cheating rather than just leaving though.

If his wife ever finds out, he could lose everything in divorce.
His mistress could get jealous and just tell his wife, too............
Why can't he just divorce her? Cannot afford to? Doesn't want the whole child custody issue?

its always the model families

Quoting Pr0udMAMA08:“ If his wife ever finds out, he could lose everything in divorce. His mistress could get jealous and ... [snip!] ... tell his wife, too............ Why can't he just divorce her? Cannot afford to? Doesn't want the whole child custody issue?”

Basically...he doesn;t want confrontation...  

Im crying right now cause I have been wondering the same thing & I keep telling myself "no it wont happen, or why would he, or Im just dumb

Quoting Brookie-poo:“ Im crying right now cause I have been wondering the same thing & I keep telling myself "no it wont happen, or why would he, or Im just dumb”

honey, why did u marry your husband?
im not asking to be a bitch i just want to know... nd if u tell me why i will respond to that, to make u feel better or at least try

Quoting ©Princess Bitch®:“ honey, why did u marry your husband? im not asking to be a bitch i just want to know... nd if u tell me why i will respond to that, to make u feel better or at least try”

Because he was the guy I stuck with & didnt break up with cause I was bored
Because I could see myself with him forever.... until I was old
Because hes the one I wanted to wake up with
Because I love him.......

Quoting Brookie-poo:“ Because he was the guy I stuck with & didnt break up with cause I was bored Because I could see ... [snip!] ... I could see myself with him forever.... until I was old Because hes the one I wanted to wake up with Because I love him.......”

but you are still so worried?.....

Quoting Brookie-poo:“ Because he was the guy I stuck with & didnt break up with cause I was bored Because I could see ... [snip!] ... I could see myself with him forever.... until I was old Because hes the one I wanted to wake up with Because I love him.......”

did you marry him because you trusted him?

Quoting ♥ Danielle+2 ♥:“ It sounds like he hasn't been happy for years though. Even the nicest guys get fed up with crap. I think he's choosing a poor choice by cheating rather than just leaving though.”

Agreed.

C.

Im not one to but into other peoples business
but if that was my friend i would tell his wife.
he could bring home diseases, why should she suffer because her husband is an ass?

Quoting ©Princess Bitch®:“ did you marry him because you trusted him?”

Yes. Very much so. I just worry cause of cases like this. It can happen to anyone.

Quoting Brookie-poo:“ Yes. Very much so. I just worry cause of cases like this. It can happen to anyone.”

well has he given you a reason for you not to trust him?
just ask him.. hey would u ever cheat on me. be sure not to accuse him

Quoting ♥LuvMyCRV©♥:“ but you are still so worried?.....”

Oh yes. Cause I see it all the time. Someone has it really good or really bad doesnt matter & they cheat. with my body changing from babies & age I find myself fearful I dont look good enough for him. bla, lol. Maybe its just the way I feel about myself right now. Who knows