re: I don't know what to say...

Quoting stephaniewalters:“ Be in the house that she is in but stay out of the way. Intrusion is a killer. Check on her every so ... [snip!] ... effort to not get offended by people when they are being openly offensive, but it is probably what is going to happen.”

Oh, well. It's not her daughter. It's his daughter who he has shared custody of. She went over there today to talk to her mother, so I hope that her own mother can tell her instead of my friend telling her. If that made any sense..

I guess I need to find a good way to see her but not watch her 24/7. I'm just at a loss over what I should even do.. It's such a horrible thing and something nobody saw coming (obviously).  

Quoting jessica [sophie's momma]:“ She called me one time and told me that he had gotten into a car accident (that's all she knew at the ... [snip!] ... hours later, crying hysterically. All she said was, "I need you. Jon's dead." My heart just stopped beating. It was so unreal.”

oh my. idk what i would do. im terrified of my so dying. considering he is trying to get into the army does not make me any happier. i dont want him to do it what so ever.. but its what he wants to do so i have to support him.. but im already a very emotional person i take zoloft and i need a mood stabilizer.. idk what i would do..

I don't think that it is your friend's responsibility to tell her. Her mom should. She likely is broken up over it too, but if that is her daughter she should hear it from her.

Watch out for this scenario. If your friend was close to the little girl then it will be a major loss if she doesn't have access to her anymore. Not a concern this second, but it will be.

All death comes with two kinds of losses: Primary, which would be the loss of the person who died.
The other is secondary losses and this will be a huge one for her. These will include all of the plans that they made together and the life that they had hoped to share. That little girl could easily be a secondary loss for her if she doesn't have much of a relationship with the girl's mother.

Quoting Owen's Mommy!!:“ oh my. idk what i would do. im terrified of my so dying. considering he is trying to get into the army ... [snip!] ... have to support him.. but im already a very emotional person i take zoloft and i need a mood stabilizer.. idk what i would do..”

I don't know. I'm sorry hon.  
I came home and just hugged Evan and hugged him and hugged him. I don't know what I would do if anything happened to him. I worry about him constantly.. when he's out driving... when he's out doing anything on his own.. ahhh...  

Quoting stephaniewalters:“ I don't think that it is your friend's responsibility to tell her. Her mom should. She likely is broken ... [snip!] ... That little girl could easily be a secondary loss for her if she doesn't have much of a relationship with the girl's mother.”

That was very well put. I don't think she was in the right state of mind when she went over there. Luckily, she just gave the little girl a hug and a kiss, and didn't let her see her cry. She asked if it was okay if she still saw her, because it was all of Jon that she had left. Hopefully she'll be able to.

She was working on their wedding registry when she got the phone call. :\

Quoting jessica [sophie's momma]:“ I don't know. I'm sorry hon.   I came home and just hugged Evan and hugged him and hugged him. I don't ... [snip!] ... happened to him. I worry about him constantly.. when he's out driving... when he's out doing anything on his own.. ahhh...  ”

thats how i am. and jonnhy is in florida..=[ and wont be back till my bday...

Quoting Owen's Mommy!!:“ thats how i am. and jonnhy is in florida..=[ and wont be back till my bday...”

 

Quoting jessica [sophie's momma]:“  ”

yea its hard.. but its only like 50 somethin days.. (christmas!) he is down trying to take of family stuff.. =[ and they dont like me..

Quoting Owen's Mommy!!:“ yea its hard.. but its only like 50 somethin days.. (christmas!) he is down trying to take of family stuff.. =[ and they dont like me..”

that sucks. i'm sorry momma.  

Quoting jessica [sophie's momma]:“ that sucks. i'm sorry momma.  ”

its ok.... once they finally get to meet me they will like me. lol. they dont like that i have a kid.. at my age especially.. considering his age... his mom is a tad stuck up as well so that dont help...but like i said once they meet me they will like me.. the majority of people do..