re: Introduce Yourself....

My name is Kelly(36) and I live in Brisbane, Australia. My bf name is Troy(31). We found out we were pregnant in April this year. I have a daughter from a previous relationship who is 12 in October.
We werent ttc at the time but we werent NOT trying either. We were just going with the flow and were really excited to find out we were going to have a baby together.
I work in childcare as a Preshool teacher/Assistant Director full time and I am also studying my Bachelor of Education-Early Childhood externally. My life is pretty full.
On May 15 I was filling in at one of our sister centres as their director was away. The centre is in a rough part of town and some of the children are quite challenged. On this day in the morning I reieved a blow to the stomach by one of the children. It was hard but not really hard enough to do any damage to me at 8 weeks pregnant. It freaked me out a little but I just continued on with my day. In the afternoon I went to the bathroom and noticed some very faint brownish discharge. I was immediately worried and called my doctor who booked me in for an ultrasound the next day "just to be safe and put my mind at ease". This was not to be. Not long after midnight that night I began bleeding alot heavier- pink/red. I spent the remainder of the night crying and on the toilet.
At the ultrasound the next day our worst fears were confirmed. There was no heartbeat.I raced to my docctor in hysterics. He was honest and said that he felt I was miscarrying. He hoped that I would miscarry naturally.This was all happening on May 16- the same day my baby brother passed away 31 years ago. I did not realise this until a few days later when my sister bought it up. I bled for about a week, passed small clots etc but not knowing what I was looking for and never having been through this before I really didnt know what to look for or expect to pass. Eventually after a week of heavy on off bleeding and on/off cramping I went back to my doctor who felt that it was taking way to long to pass and sent me to the hospital for a D and C. That night at the hospital- some stupid doctor who could hardly speak english examined me and said that my cervix was open- which was a good thing so I could pass the baby etc. She sent me home and made an appoint ment for the next day at the early pregnancy assesment unit. She was reluctant to perform a D and C there and then and wanted me assessed.
That night I passed a huge blob of tissue and thought- hopefully thats it and its all over- Not so
The next day I had another ultrasound and as soon as the screen image came up I could see there was still remains in there. I was devistated. I finally had a D and C after waiting 5 hours at the hospital. Afterwards I felt so sick but it was my first step to recovery. The bleeding stopped within a week and my cycle returned a month later.

I am convinced our angel was a boy due to the fact that this all really began to unfold on MAy 16- the same day my brother passed away and I feel that my brother Matthew is taking care of my angel baby.

Kel

hello ladies, i'm mandie i am 27, and i am still kinda new to baby gaga, i signed up last month shortly after discovering i was pregnant for the sixth time, i only have one son, my kristopher, he just turned six last week. i had one miscarriage before him, in july of 2000 at almost ten weeks, and found out four months later we were preggers again, i was petrified everyday of my pregnancy with him, until the day i held that giant(9lbs 3oz and 21 1/2 inches long) lil boy in my arms. since then i have had four more miscarriages, my most recent one being a couple days ago. i discovered that i was pregnant earlier this year, but within a few weeks i was in surgery due to an ectopic pregnancy. at the time the father of that baby was in jail, well he got out a month after our loss, and ended up moving in with me. i wasn't supposed to be able to get pregnant again, during the surgery for my ectopic pregnancy i also had my remaining fallopian tube cut and tied. well then as a joke i took a pregnancy test with a friend who thought she was pregnant, and as far as i knew i couldn't get pregnant again. well her test came back negative, and mine positive, i went to the dr imediately, and over the course of the past month i had four u/s. during the first three there was no fetal pole, or baby to be seen, just a sack, my dr informed me of the posibility of a missed abortion, or that i may be a lot earlier than we thought. well i woke up the morning of the 12th, in severe pain, it felt like someone had stabbed me with a knife in my stomach, i went to the bathroom, and there was blood everywhere. i instantly headed to the er and they ran all kinds of tests on me, and finally did another and my final u/s, this time they did an external, rather than the vaginal one. this time there were two sacks to be seen on the screen, one on top of the other, where as we didn't see it before, b/c of the placement of both. we were also able to see both babies, each measured just over 8 weeks, which also showed i was earlier than we originally thought, but neither of my angels had a heartbeat, i was then taken back to the er room i was in to await my ob, she came in and discussed the d&c she was about to do. i was scared, it's not the first time i have had one done, but i was alone all day in that hospital. she informed me, she didn't want me to get pregnant again for a year, and told me that they were sending my angels off to pathology to find out why they didn't make it. as for the father, he and i have not been together in over a month, we had some issues, and i couldn't live with him anymore, he said he was sorry for my loss, and he wished i didn't have to go thru this, that i must be really hurting. i pretty much know he was happy about it, b/c he had asked me to have an abortion on many occasions before we spilt. i know all things happen for a reason, and i am trying to keep my chin up! my dr. says not too worry, as we already know i am capable of having children, as i do have a healthy beautiful son. but still sometimes it's hard to hold on!  

tigerlilyfae wrote: hello ladies, i'm mandie i am 27, and i am still kinda new to baby gaga, i signed up last month shortly after discovering i was pregnant for the sixth time, i only have one son, my kristopher, he just turned six last week. i had one miscarriage before him, in july of 2000 at almost ten weeks, and found out four months later we were preggers again, i was petrified everyday of my pregnancy with him, until the day i held that giant(9lbs 3oz and 21 1/2 inches long) lil boy in my arms. since then i have had four more miscarriages, my most recent one being a couple days ago. i discovered that i was pregnant earlier this year, but within a few weeks i was in surgery due to an ectopic pregnancy. at the time the father of that baby was in jail, well he got out a month after our loss, and ended up moving in with me. i wasn't supposed to be able to get pregnant again, during the surgery for my ectopic pregnancy i also had my remaining fallopian tube cut and tied. well then as a joke i took a pregnancy test with a friend who thought she was pregnant, and as far as i knew i couldn't get pregnant again. well her test came back negative, and mine positive, i went to the dr imediately, and over the course of the past month i had four u/s. during the first three there was no fetal pole, or baby to be seen, just a sack, my dr informed me of the posibility of a missed abortion, or that i may be a lot earlier than we thought. well i woke up the morning of the 12th, in severe pain, it felt like someone had stabbed me with a knife in my stomach, i went to the bathroom, and there was blood everywhere. i instantly headed to the er and they ran all kinds of tests on me, and finally did another and my final u/s, this time they did an external, rather than the vaginal one. this time there were two sacks to be seen on the screen, one on top of the other, where as we didn't see it before, b/c of the placement of both. we were also able to see both babies, each measured just over 8 weeks, which also showed i was earlier than we originally thought, but neither of my angels had a heartbeat, i was then taken back to the er room i was in to await my ob, she came in and discussed the d&c she was about to do. i was scared, it's not the first time i have had one done, but i was alone all day in that hospital. she informed me, she didn't want me to get pregnant again for a year, and told me that they were sending my angels off to pathology to find out why they didn't make it. as for the father, he and i have not been together in over a month, we had some issues, and i couldn't live with him anymore, he said he was sorry for my loss, and he wished i didn't have to go thru this, that i must be really hurting. i pretty much know he was happy about it, b/c he had asked me to have an abortion on many occasions before we spilt. i know all things happen for a reason, and i am trying to keep my chin up! my dr. says not too worry, as we already know i am capable of having children, as i do have a healthy beautiful son. but still sometimes it's hard to hold on!  

I am sorry to hear about everything you have been threw. You will find lot's of support here. By the way, I've never met another Mandie, who spells it the same way as me!

2happy wrote:

I am sorry to hear about everything you have been threw. You will find lot's of support here. By the way, I've never met another Mandie, who spells it the same way as me!

actually my mom started spelling it that way when i was still a little girl, and thanks hun, i appreciate it!!!

My name is Lyndsay. Im 23. I lost my baby on May 14, 2007. There was no reason. Nobody really knows why. I was 20 weeks and 2 days pregnant. I had previously thought I had a son. Dustin Lane Walker. An ultrasound by a friend in the ER said as much. Once the kereotyping came back on July 23, 2007 I was shocked to find out I had a daughter. She is so beautiful.

Dustin Lane Walker


My tattoo


me

Im new here very new infact Im Brianna Just recently lost my son at 19 weeks on Tuesday Aug. 14,2007 he is beautiful and was a big baby he was 10 inchs i did have to option of holding him but i didnt take it because i was scared i would hurt his fragile figure (his head was soft) i did look at him tho i looked at his hands his feet his face all so beautiful its really hard for me to bring him up because its still a open wound but i think he would perfer if i told people about him i chose to keep all the stuff that was bought for him because by getting rid of it i would feel like i was trying to get rid of the fact that i was going to have the baby he is my son i could only image what mothers felt after losing a child till this happend i love him and if i had a choice to bring him back to take my place at first i would say yes but then i though about it i would have to say no because he is in a far better place then earth

My name is Kim. I'm 23 years old, and I've been member on Gaga for 6 months. I joined when I found out I was pregnant with my first baby.

I had a "normal" pregnancy, but it wasn't very eventful. I never felt pregnant, and I wasn't getting much of a belly. I worried constantly about miscarrying, like any expecting mother. When I reached the second trimester, I thought I was in the clear. When I was 17 wks pregnant, I took a recommended AFP test, to test of any abnormalities. A week later, I received a call from my doctor telling me that my test was showing high levels, and I needed to see a specialist. I had to wait a week to get in. Thinking it was nothing, considering a lot of those tests come back with false positives...we were just excited to find out what we were having. When I sat down with the doctor for an ultrasound, my husband by my side. When the doctor jokingly said that my baby was bad test taker, things were looking for me...I wasn't worried about anything, until the doctor read my test results. He told me that it didn't look good. With that, I started balling. He told me that the test I took, a normal reading would be a 1 or below, and my levels were reading a 7. He started the ultrasound, and his fears were correct. He diagnosed my child with Anencephaly...I didn't know what that meant, but I automatically thought that I was going to have a "special needs child" and I was happy with that, until he told that my baby wasn't going to survive. All I remember was crying my eyes out. He asked if we wanted to know what the baby was, and we agreed. It was a little girl.

My husband and I decided to Induce, and our little girl was born July 11, 2007. Right after she was born, the doctor told me that Isabelle didn't have Anencephaly., but a rare case of amniotic band syndrome (ABS) where a piece of the amniotic sac torn and floated around the amniotic fluid, and unfortunately wrapped itself around my little girls head (the back of it where the brain would have been) and made the perfect amputation. It usually affects limbs or fingers...rarely the head. My little girl was born still and weight 7.5 oz, and was 9 inches long. I was 21 weeks and 3 days when I had my little angel. I miss her so much.

God Bless

Hello everybody here is my story.
In November of 2002 unkownest to my husband and I, we were pregnant.
On the morning of November 16th, 2002. I went to the hospital to interview for a job there. During the interview I had some sharp pains. I chalked it up to being my period. When I was finished with my interview I drove home. On the way home I had a pain that made me double over pain. I pulled over and let the pain subside. I made it back to my house.
When I got up to the house, I went and layed down on my bed. I noticed that I was bleeeding. I decided to get up, and go take a hot bath. I thought it would help with the pain. It didn't work. When I got out of the bathroom, I went back to the bedroom, where my husband was playing with our oldest son Daniel. He looked at me at told me that I didn't look good. I layed back down. The pain kept getting worse and worse. Finally I was doubled over in pain on the floor. My husband decided that it was time to take me to the hospital.
We arrived back at the hospital 15 minutes later. I sat in the waiting room for almost 1.5 hours, before they would take me back. When I finally did go back the doctor right away ordered blood tests. The nurse came by and started an iv. She gave me some medicine for nasuea and then she gave me some medicine for pain. What she failed to realize was that I had lost so much blood. After adminstiring the medicine I soon started feeling drowsy. Unbeknownst to me, I had flat lined. I was gone for about a minute and a half. After bringing me back, I went down for an ultrasound. I knew something was wrong, but nobody was telling me anything. My husband had asked the doctor not to say anything to me. He didn't want me worrying when I went in for surgery. I had emergency surgery that night to remove the pregnancy, my left tube, and the ovary. The tube completely exploded. I didn't find out unti the doctor came in and talked to me the next morning.
I always wonder if the baby would have been a boy or a girl. I miss him/her to this day. I have two beautiful sons and a third baby on the way.

I'm new to this site! My name is Edna. I had a miscarriage 11 weeks ago and I can't get over it! I still cry everyday! My friend Kyra told me about this site and I decided to check it out! I was 17 weeks and my boyfriend and I had just moved in a house together. He has 2 kids with his ex, but he kept assuring me that things were over with her and that he loved me! Well the day that I lost my baby, we had his kids for the weekend. I got up to get his son a sippie cup and then went to the bathroom and was bleeding! I went in the bedroom and fell to the floor. I knew something was wrong. I called my mom and her and my sister came and got me and took me to the hospital! He stayed home and watched the kids. When they starting doing the ultrasound I knew something was wrong because I didn't see the heartbeat! I asked if everything was ok and the dr said no, I'm sorry, you said you're 17 weeks and the baby only measures 12. I burst out into tears! They took me back to the room w/ my mom and I told her to call Robert and get him there before I had the d&c done! I forgot to say that his ex works at the hospital and she was the first person we saw when we got there! He said he was going to call her and get her to come get the kids, so I just laid in the bed crying, kinda in shock! I didn't feel like it was real! Well my sister tried calling his phone again and it went to the voice mail, so I told her to call his ex's phone. She said that she didn't care what was going on with me and that if we called her phone again that she would come to my room and kick my ass! Well, I had the dnc done and went home and he still had the kids so I went to my sister's! I just couldn't handle being around kids at that time! My sister had her mother in law watch hers. Robert was supposed to come get me and never did. He didn't come home that night and when he did the next day he let me know that he was getting back with his ex! So I moved out the day after my miscarriage and have been dealing w/ my loss w/o him! I feel like I've lost everything! I just don't know how to cope! I don't have any pictures...I didn't think to ask for any while they were doing the ultrasound. I never got any explaination or closure! Now no one in his family will even talk to me! It's like I never existed!

justsmile42 wrote: I'm new to this site! My name is Edna. I had a miscarriage 11 weeks ago and I can't get over it! I still cry everyday! My friend Kyra told me about this site and I decided to check it out! I was 17 weeks and my boyfriend and I had just moved in a house together. He has 2 kids with his ex, but he kept assuring me that things were over with her and that he loved me! Well the day that I lost my baby, we had his kids for the weekend. I got up to get his son a sippie cup and then went to the bathroom and was bleeding! I went in the bedroom and fell to the floor. I knew something was wrong. I called my mom and her and my sister came and got me and took me to the hospital! He stayed home and watched the kids. When they starting doing the ultrasound I knew something was wrong because I didn't see the heartbeat! I asked if everything was ok and the dr said no, I'm sorry, you said you're 17 weeks and the baby only measures 12. I burst out into tears! They took me back to the room w/ my mom and I told her to call Robert and get him there before I had the d&c done! I forgot to say that his ex works at the hospital and she was the first person we saw when we got there! He said he was going to call her and get her to come get the kids, so I just laid in the bed crying, kinda in shock! I didn't feel like it was real! Well my sister tried calling his phone again and it went to the voice mail, so I told her to call his ex's phone. She said that she didn't care what was going on with me and that if we called her phone again that she would come to my room and kick my ass! Well, I had the dnc done and went home and he still had the kids so I went to my sister's! I just couldn't handle being around kids at that time! My sister had her mother in law watch hers. Robert was supposed to come get me and never did. He didn't come home that night and when he did the next day he let me know that he was getting back with his ex! So I moved out the day after my miscarriage and have been dealing w/ my loss w/o him! I feel like I've lost everything! I just don't know how to cope! I don't have any pictures...I didn't think to ask for any while they were doing the ultrasound. I never got any explaination or closure! Now no one in his family will even talk to me! It's like I never existed!

Im so sorry to hear your story I can only imagine what it feels like to lose a baby and to be going through a breakup at the same time... Your in my prayers...

Hi my name is Bree. I live in Eugene Oreogn.I am 23 years old. I first got pregnant in february 2007. I found out in mid april we were having a baby, i felt soooo happy!! Then i started bleeding very heavily and went to the emergency room only to find out i had had a miscarriage. They did an ultrasound and saw no baby. I sat in my bathroom for two hours crying holding my 7 week old fetus in my hands on April the 27th.
I then found out August 2nd 2007 i was pregnant again! I was on top of the world! I was,just like last time, having no morning sickness ,but people told me not to worry, so i took it with a grin of salt. On August 22nd I started very lightly spotting. I started freaking out because I knew this could not be good. I went to the emergency room where they did an ultrasound and so no heartbeat.They told me not to worry because i was only 7 weeks and 6 days and it was no big deal.
I had my blood drawn and my hcG levels were 2333, about normal. so i went home, went in for a blood draw the next day, and paced my moms house for 4 hours. i finally got a phone call and they told me my hcG level was 2220. I was so devestated,i crumbled into my husbands arms and sobbed .its been 9 days, 2 days ago i had a d&c to remove everything, and im still at home sobbing daily. i haven't been back to work yet, as i do very physical work and my doctor is afraid of me getting hurt. i dont like public, i stay all cooped up inside and dont leave. my next door neighbors have a 2 month old son, and everytime i see them outside my window i bawl for hours. i can here him crying on the other side of our duplex wall and all i want to do is go deaf. this has been the worst 4 months of my life

Hi im Theresa 20 ive been married to my man for 2 years now we have one wonderful daughter Emma who is now 15months.. when i was 4 weeks prego i found out we was goin to have our second me goin back to school hubby starting new job emma in daycare we was so excited but at about 5 weeks i got bad cramps so i went to the ER the doc said its normal and gave me pain meds i didnt take them and went along with the week well 1 week later just before i went to bed i noticed spotting but didnt think it was anything to worry about i went to bed but at 2am i woke up in a pile of blood and knew we rished t th ER just to wait all night the nexts morning i went for an ultrasound she didnt tell me anything just made me worry more then around 930am this young doc came in and said oh ya so you lost the baby!!i was so hurt didnt know what to do didnt know how to act no one in my family or friends have lost a baby so its been hard!  

My name is Michelle.. My husbands name is Jerry. I am aschool bus driver and he is a Funeral Director. I have a nine year old son named Michael.








My baby had died 3 weeks prior to us finding out..

Hello all! My name is Amanda. I joined the site 8 months ago now. It's hard to believe it's been that long now. When I first signed up I was here to get a ticker, ya know. It was a really busy time in my life (finishing up my last semester of college, etc.) so I didn't take the time to introduce myself. Then it all ended. February 22, 2007 was my first scheduled appointment with my OBGYN. I had been in previously for tests and such. This was my first with MY doctor. I awoke at 5 o'clock that morning with the most dreadful cramps I had ever felt. I got up and went to the bathroom to find a solid stream of blood pouring out from me. I had experienced some spotting 3 weeks before then. I was told it was okay that it was not uncommon for mothers to spot during their second pregnancy. During that spotting, 3 weeks prior, they did send me to the hospital for an u/s. As a matter of fact that u/s was on my 25th b-day. They found the heartbeat with no problems, measured and reported that my bean was some where between 8 & 9 weeks (I'm pretty irregular so it is hard to pin it down to the day) and sent me on my way. So here we are on the 22nd of Feb I was hysterical. My husband knew as soon as he awoke that morning that something wasn't right. I had already called my mom and she was on her way (she lives about an hour and a half away). My husband choose to go to work to keep his mind occupied while I called the doctor. My appointment was at 2:30 that afternoon so they had me come on in for an u/s. When we got there the nurse came out and took my mom & I back to the u/s room. She immediately began talking real positive and was showing me the screen from the beginning. Here's your cervix, and the uterus is here, then she got quiet. She paused for a good 5 minutes. In the back of my mind I knew. And then she said it ... "I can't find the heartbeat". She finished her report and then took me to a room to wait on the doctor. When the doctor finally made time to deliver my bad news she started with ... "There is no heart beat and there hasn't been any growth since the original u/s on Jan 30." That was followed up with the most comforting piece of material I suppose she could come up with. "You did nothing. Almost 1 in 5 pregnancies end this way" Now I don't know how it the freaking world she expects that to be helpful. Once my mom & I left the office my phone blew up it seemed everyone decided to call at the same time, I don't know what they were expecting. I could barely talk. A couple of weeks later I had to go back to see if everything passed properly, which did, and then the doctor asks me how I'm feeling. Like it's soooo hard to guess. She prescribed me with PAXIL, no offense to anyone taking this, but it didn't do anything for me. And then I started seeing the commercial about the problems it can create during pregnancy so I discontinued use. I've tried moving on on my own, putting that memory in storage, not to forget, but not to dwell on. It seems like everyone around me have successfully completed that stage of healing, why can't I. I expected that all these feelings would come back to haunt me this week, I was due on 9/11, but I didn't expect the feelings to be so strong or to not even be able to exscape them in my dreams. My heart goes out to everyone of you. I know how strong you have to be to be able to talk about your stories. It has been so hard to open up and accept the things that have happened. Just going day to day, trying to hold your head high, and not dwell on what could have been. Hoping and praying that you get the chance again!

I WANT TO THANK ALL U BRAVE MOMMY FOR TELLING YOUR STORIES SO MANY OF US WOMEN DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MANY THINGW CAN GO WRONG ONCE U CONCIEVE ONCE WE HAVE A SUCESSFUL PREGNANCY WE THINK LL IS GOOD BUT I WANT TO GIVE U ALL MY BLESSING WITH UR PREGNANICES AND FUTURE CHILDREN