Labor and Delivery -wondering what to expect?

Hi there, are you a first time mommy who's not sure what to expect when it comes to labor and delivery?
Ever wonder what's really supposed to happen?
Have questions -but unsure what or how to ask -or maybe think it's a 'dumb' or 'unimportant' question?
In this thread, I have included a detailed account on how labor and delivery are supposed to naturally progress. If you are interested at all in having a natural birth -feel free to check out my thread on True Natural Childbirth -which explains all sorts of things on what the origional approach to natural childbirth was, and the difference between it, and what most people now believe 'natural childbirth' to refer to.
Also included in the other thread are some relaxation techniques as well as an explanation of why relaxation is helpful during pregnancy, labor, and childbirth. -Among other things... the link for this other thread is: http://forum.baby-gaga.com/about847293.html#19996026
If you have any questions about any of the content in this or the other thread -or just want to ask a random question -feel free to PM me, and I'll give you the best answer I can give.
I enjoy visiting, and hearing about other mommy's stories, so if you just need someone to talk with, or ask questions you're not so comfortable asking in public, feel free to confide in me. I will never laugh at you -though I may find an opportunity to laugh with you, and I will try to help make you feel at ease with the idea of giving birth as naturally as possible, and with confidence.
Best wishes, and good luck! ~KP

Labor and Birth
(Note: The information contained in this post has been taken from the book:
Childbirth Without Fear: The Original Approach to Natural Childbirth,
By: Dr. Grantly Dick-Read, and may have been slightly altered in the process of posting it for your convenience.
Though I agree and embrace Dr. Dick-Read's philosophies and discoveries, I in no way claim them as my own, and take no personal credit for them.)
(Note#2: The book was written and made note that, to minimize confusion, the 'husband' will be referred to. This term is simply including the Significant other or, if there is no male partner, then possibly your labor coach, close friend, -etc -basically your support person. The reference to 'husband' is not intended to offend, either in the book -or by myself; it is simply being used for less confusion in the writing/copying process. ~KP)

Two hundred and eighty days is an arbitrary figure for the length of pregnancy, calculated from the first day of the last menstrual period. (The average actual length from conception to birth is estimated as 267 days.) But a baby may be full term and quite normal if it arrives at any time between 253 and 281 days. It must not be thought, therefore, that a baby born naturally ten days before the expected date is necessarily premature, or ten days after is postmature. Each pregnancy needs evaluation on its own merits. When a baby is "ripe" and ready, labor will begin.
As soon as a baby is ready for birth, it releases hormones which activate the mother's hormone secretions to set the birth in motion. A mother doesn't just "give" birth. It is the interaction between two human beings, the mother and her baby.
Onset of Labor
There are three signs that labor is beginning:
1. Rhythmical contractions of the uterus. These are felt as sensations of tightness without discomfort in the abdomen. The uterus becomes hard and tightness can be felt all over the organ. The importance of the sign is in the rhythm and not the contractions. A pregnant woman may have definite contractions some weeks before her baby is due, but if a regular and continuous rhythm is not established, they do not usually indicate the onset of labor. True labor contractions may start once every ten or fifteen minutes, or even at longer intervals, but gradually the interval decreases until they come every three or four minutes. There is no pain as long as the abdomen is relaxed.
2. Leaking of the waters. The bag of waters may leak slowly, or it may suddenly burst and the waters flow out in a gush. This occasionally occurs before the uterus starts its rhythmical contractions, but this is true more frequently with subsequent babies than with the first. There is no pain when the bag of waters bursts, though it may be startling. It is wise to notify a doctor or midwife immediately. Rhythmical contractions may begin in an hour or two if they have not begun previously, or they may not begin for two or three days. But it is an indication that labor will soon be under way, so the woman should be under her doctor's advisement. (KP~ I believe now, the doctors will want you to go into labor within 24 hours of the water breaking because of the possible risk of infection.)
3. The show. A light discharge of blood and mucus, known as "the show," may appear. It usually occurs after uterine contractions have begun to dilate the cervix slightly, thus dislodging the plug of mucus that kept the cervix sealed during pregnancy. This is positive evidence of the onset of labor.
Any of these three major signs usually makes it easy for a woman to realize that her baby is on the way. She should get in touch with her doctor or midwife, even if there is some doubt in her mind, and follow advice on when to leave for the hospital.
Early First-Stage Labor
Once labor has begun and the doctor has been notified, "plenty of time" should be the motto, with no hurry or anxiety unless the hospital is a long distance away. Small chores can be attended to around the house in preparation for leaving. Often there is excitement and relief that the day has come, which gives rise to a flurry of last-minute activity. This distraction helps the uterus settle down to its work without too much attention until labor is steadily under way. The doctor or midwife will advise when to leave for the hospital or birthing center.
Upon arrival, the woman is greeted by a receptionist and taken immediately to a labor room if labor is progressing rapidly. If not, she is identified by her prenatal records and admitted according to the usual obstetric routine.
Once in the labor room, she will be gowned and made ready for an examination by her doctor or midwife. This preparation must be in keeping with the written instructions of her own physician. (KP~Written orders, referring to the Birth Plan which you and your doctor agreed upon ahead of time.) No enema, perineal shaving, analgesics, amnesics, sedatives, fluids, or oxytocics (which induce or stimulate labor) are to be given orally or intravenously, except on the physician's written orders specifically for her and with her consent. These written orders may also include the request for no routine use of internal or external monitors, and the freedom for her to be up and about and/or to assume any position she finds comfortable, in or out of bed. It is wise for the written orders from the physician to have been sent up to the hospital in advance and it would be well for the couple to bring an extra copy with them, in case the one at the hospital cannot be located. This will help assure cooperation from the staff. The husband can be a great help in explaining his wife's desires to the staff, so that she can proceed with her labor without needing to make any explanations.
If the bag of waters has broken, the mother will need to stay in bed until after being examined, to be sure the baby's head is well engaged and there is no danger of prolapse of the cord. During the medical examination the physician will also determine how far along she is in labor, listen to the baby's heart, and determine its position by palpating (feeling) her abdomen.
I do not advise that during the first stage of the average labor a woman should be asked to relax the whole time unless she wishes it, unless she has overcome all the difficulties of progressive relaxation and is adept at the art. In the ordinary labor I prefer the woman to be awake to her general condition, able to listen to instruction and learn what is going on, and able to recognize the encouragement given her by those in attendance. But as soon as there is a sign of a uterine contraction, she must at once apply herself and relax to the very best of her ability.
A quiet restfulness between contractions is sufficient. Many women prefer to sit in a rocking chair and read during the earlier part of the first stage. Some prefer to walk about, if the waters have not yet broken. Undisturbed peace should characterize the first stage of labor -without mental or physical tension, with every happiness that a woman can be given, and with every encouragement to be confident in the right outcome of her labor.
Sometimes, when labor is slow in making progress, a mild sedative may be beneficial to help her rest peacefully or sleep. (however he is not saying it is Necessary, just that it can be helpful, particularly if you are unable to obtain sleep by relaxing etc.) A few hours' sleep, particularly at night, during the early dilation of the cervix evades the weariness of mind and body that causes a woman to begin to interpret any sensation as painful. This therapeutic common sense should not be confused with the use of drugs to relieve pain. No woman should have to go without sleep for fifteen or twenty hours of a slow first stage. (KP~ like what happened to me with my first)
Not infrequently labor begins, the contractions become regular and increasingly stronger, yet when the woman arrives at the hospital they slow down or even stop. This "latent phase" need not make everyone alarmed, injecting pitocin to "stimulate" labor, or having the mother walk up and down the hall for endless hours in an attempt to "hurry it up." Being admitted to the hospital seems to make some attendants and couples alike think that labor should move along at an arbitrary pace and finish in an arbitrary period of time. The stress of thinking labor should progress "faster" actually tends to inhibit its progress, and may even stop it altogether.
It is helpful for hospitals to have a lounge area where mothers in early labor can rest or walk about without being admitted, while waiting to see if labor proceeds. (KP~ see if anyone is using the family waiting room, or some other semi private, out of the way place) If not, they can return home. When labor again enters an active phase on its own, they return and are admitted. Left at peace, when active labor begins on its own, progress will likely continue more quickly toward full dilation.
During labor the mother should receive adequate nourishment through liquids such as milk, orange juice, or tea to avoid fatigue and dehydration. Her husband should be brought full meals at every mealtime so that he need not leave her nor become worn out through lack of food. (KP~ Why it's good to bring food for daddy or your support person in the 'take to the hospital' bag -or, ask the L&D nurse on duty if she can have something brought in for them so they need not leave you.)
Once active first-stage labor is well established, the woman should never be left alone. Her husband's presence is invaluable, for he not only helps her be relaxed and comfortable during contractions, but his loving caresses stimulate her sexual hormones ot make the labor more effective (breast stimulation has been shown to be an effective stimulus to labor), and they also help her to relax the cervix and perineum.
The couple should be allowed as much privacy as they desire, with no one entering the labor room without knocking and requesting permission to enter -a simple courtesy. (KP~ which you may have to request upon arrival since it may or may not be standard procedure at your particular hospital -I'm unaware of the norm for this, but don't remember anyone knocking during my first labor.) The physician, midwife, or labor attendant should be close at hand, however, at present as much as the couple desires, to give guidance and reassurance.
As rhythmical contractions of the uterus increase in intensity, gradually dilating the cervix, there is a demand for patience. If the training that has been given in deep, quiet breathing and complete relaxation is well and truly carried out during contractions, this period of waiting is much less taxing on a woman's patience. The routine of becoming completely flaccid, especially in the abdominal and pelvic area during a contraction, will help her improve her skill as time goes on.
When the opening of the cervix is about two inches, or five centimeters, in diameter, many women will begin to feel the strain of waiting, impatient with contractions that seem to be doing no good. They may become restless, not relax as well during contractions as before, and thus begin to have some discomfort. This is a typical emotional reaction, and the husband and/or attendants should reassure the mother with explanation and help her reestablish adequate relaxation and deep, quiet breathing with each contraction until she is comfortable once more.
It is still not necessary for her to be in bed. In fact, it has been demonstrated that mild activity and an upright position are a stimulus to labor. A rocking chair for the mother should be in every labor room. The gentle rocking motion provides mild activity, while at the same time supporting her comfortably in an upright position; her feet can rest on a footstool or pillows. During contractions she should stop rocking, let her head drop forward, and relax totally.
If she is walking around, during contractions she can rest her upper body on her husband for support so that she is bent over, and totally relaxed without danger of falling. If she is on her hands and knees, her upper body should be supported across the side of the bed. If she prefers to lie down, she should assume the position most comfortable for her, either the reclining-chair position with her back and shoulders raised, or the left lateral position.
No woman should lie on her back during any stage of labor for more than brief moments, for the weight of her baby and uterus places pressure on the major eins and arteries found in her lower back, and blocks adequate circulation. This can reduce the oxygen the baby receives and can cause a sudden drop in the mother's blood pressure: the hypotensive syndrome, as it is called, has frequently been observed by attendants without an awareness that the woman's supine position was its cause.
Late First-Stage Labor
Position
As labor progresses and the contractions come more quickly and become stronger, the woman should assume the labor position most comfortable for her, keeping her back rounded and being completely supported. She should remain fairly relaxed between contractions from now on, in order to deepen her level of relaxation during each one. But even if she is relaxing well and seems comfortable, she still must not be left alone. She will be aware of the presence or absence of her husband and/or other helpers. Nor must she be bothered with unnecessary vaginal exams or other unnecessary intrusions. The baby's heartbeat can be monitored from time to time without disturbing her unduly or making her change positions.
It is important that her bladder be kept empty, and that she use the bathroom frequently during early labor, and then again before getting into bed to relax completely. All her joints should be loose and bent slightly, and if she is on her side, her knee and upper thigh need to be firmly supported by a large, firm pillow. She must consciously "let go" all muscular tension in the upper thigh, lower abdomen, and lower back, relaxing the pelvic area so completely that the outlet seems to be falling open of its own accord.
Relaxation during the first-stage contractions has the most astonishing effect. If the patient has been sympathetically treated and well instructed, she should have no difficulty whatever in avoiding all pain during the first stage of normal labor. It may be that it will not be easy for her, during the last part of the first stage, to avoid discomfort, but the calmer she is, the more relaxed she will become. It is difficult to relax when under the influence of strong emotional disturbance.
When a physician has a patient who reaches a degree of relaxation, he or she should remember not to be too ambitious and expect too much of her. But occasionally there will be the absolute delight of finding a woman who becomes adept at relaxing. I have had many such cases. Some of them have appeared to be lying as if in a daydream from the beginning of their labor until the end. Their relaxation was so complete that they became almost oblivious to the fact of parturition, and, at the end of the first stage, relaxation during the contractions of the so called pain period of labor enabled them to pass through it without discomfort. They then automatically brought into play the muscles of expulsion as the second stage began, but continued to lie in a completely relaxed state when not pushing.
The idea of pain-relievers and pain to such completely relaxed women is quite absurd. It does not enter their minds. They have no desire for it, for they do not have pain. But they understand what it said to them, listen, and carry out instructions in full cooperation.
Transition

Sorry, still working on getting it all up on here, More Later!
~Hope this helps, ~KP