re: Wanna know a secret?

Well written Steph. Idk maybe give him the letter?

Quoting KristaAnne [ LPC ]:" Well written Steph. Idk maybe give him the letter?"

I don't have the guts to  

<blockquote><b>Quoting Chippermunkk {FPC}:</b>" I don't have the guts to  "</blockquote>




I think it might help

Quoting JessicaRabbitBNH:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Chippermunkk {FPC}:</b>" I don't have the guts to  "</blockquote> I think it might help"

I wound up telling him, and he said he was being serious about it. I asked him why he would never think of giving me a second chance, and he said "you're not right for me." I'm too emotional for him, and cry at a lot of stuff. after that convo we agreed he wouldnt stay after Draven went to bed because that was messing with my emotions. He said I should have just went to him, but I didn't because I knew the answer (thats what he said). I didn't ask him because I didn't wanna push him away.
Even though he told me that I still don't want to give up all hope about us ever getting back together, but it helped me realize that I can't stay stuck in the past, and need to make an effort with other people. The past year i've went on dates, but I always put up a block so they couldn't get TOO close to me.

and after our convo, and he took Draven for the day, and I wound up telling him mom how I though he was seriouss this time and we were never getting back together. She said whether I'm with him or not I'll always be her DIL, and then she said that things can change. only time will tell, and apparantly his whole family (along with mine) are praying we'll eventually get back together.

and then she said "when you come up here in may, he'll realize he'll start to miss you cuz he can't see you everyday, and then when you go back home, tell him you're thinking about moving up there, it will probably open his eyes some. (yes shes plotting against her own son in a sense).

i actually made a post about my secret... here it is tho ill link as well
LINK :
http://forum.baby-gaga.com/about2151036.html

ok so i have 3 step kids and children of my own...
i love my step kids but i love them differently than i love my own...i have tried to love them the same and i cant its a different love.

ive been with these kids for 7 yrs. their own mother left them 11 yrs ago. but she came back to our town last summer and messed them up essentially they turned on me and treat me like smurf.
i know they are going thru a lot but i just think by me sticking around it is ruining my children..the older kids fight and yell at the younger ones...
my oldest step child actually got into drugs this past year and started running away he is now in treatment but was previously in foster care since november.

my Dh is out of state doing work training and wont be back for 9-12weeks...i dont think i can stay here with the kids the way they treat me..they have NO respect for me and treat me as if i am a sister ...
at one point i was called a pitiful piece of crap and a smurfing thief by the 11yr old.

i am more aggravated by them. and feel vengeful towards them. they dont try to work with me in anything ..its always NO im not doing that or a screaming match between whatever kid it is and myself. i cant take this anymore.

I LOVE my dh but i cant take the kids anymore. i feel like a POS if i were to leave them like their bio did but i am so stressed with these kids.i dont want to be around them anymore. its that bad..and i dont know how to change this..i try to respect them and their feelings but it seems like whatever i do they have something negative to say or do.

i cant discipline them in anyway they threaten me with "im calling the cops if you do"
or they take my stuff. (the oldest was in troouble last summer so i took the tv out of his room along with the computer. he then went and took my computer and hid it from me until i gave his stuff back. )

WHAT SHOULD I DO? am i wrong in feeling this way towards them ? how can i make things better?
should i pack up and leave?

i really do love my DH and my kids deserve their father. its not their fault the older kids are acting out.

and yes counseling for them has been discussed.

i am so alone ...my DH family thinks i hate the kids and i dont i really dont i love them i just cant stand how they act. everyone gives me the "oh you treat your kids so much better than the other kids"

SICK OF HEARING THAT!!!!!!

any help would be awesome any advice

thanks for reading...sorry it was so long

I'm so over everything. No one seems to give a smurf about me or my feelings. I can not think of a single time in my life where I have ever been allowed to have a moment just to myself. Nothing is ever planned and I seem to just be a burden to everyone around me. I bend over backwards to help people and always get smurf on when I need help or want support. I am sick of feeling lonely and feeling trapped in this world that I don't want any part of. I am sick of being sucked dry emotionally and mentally by people who are supposed to love me. I really hope I don't want up tomorrow.

Quoting BG Secrets:" I'm so over everything. No one seems to give a smurf about me or my feelings. I can not think of a single ... [snip!] ... of being sucked dry emotionally and mentally by people who are supposed to love me. I really hope I don't want up tomorrow. "

So how about focusing that energy on taking care of yourself and your own happiness instead of that of others? I don't know what you're referring to specifically, but I think I kind of get it. My sister is a real people-pleaser, and she is always soooooo let down and angry when she does so much for others and things still don't go the way she wants them to. When really, if she'd just do what she really wants instead of worrying about everyone else, she'd be a lot happier, even if others weren't. (But hey--they wouldn't be happy either way, right? Can't please everyone all the time.)

I give a smurf about you, AND your feelings.   

how do u get on the BG secrets account

Quoting mommy to trouble:" how do u get on the BG secrets account"

the info should be on the first page of this thread.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Kahleesi:</b>" "</blockquote>




How are you doing w/ BD, I've seen a few of your posts. Are you two still broken up ? I definitely wouldn't recommend another kid in the mix...

Quoting Mrs. Conan [getting fit]:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Kahleesi:</b>" "</blockquote> How are you doing w/ ... [snip!] ... w/ BD, I've seen a few of your posts. Are you two still broken up ? I definitely wouldn't recommend another kid in the mix..."

Yeah, we split up back in February (after like, 6days). We hooked up once at the beginning of March, but I realised it wasn't worth it. Plus, after having pregnancy scares two months in a row, I didn't want a third. He still asks me for sex, and I keep telling him no. We haven't done anything since, and I'm trying to wait until I'm married, or in a serious relationship before I have sex again.
I understand everyone makes mistakes, and there may come a day where I slip up. But honestly, the thought that if I do it again I can become pregnant is enough to keep me from doing it.

...If that makes any sense...lol.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Kahleesi:</b>" Yeah, we split up back in February (after like, 6days). We hooked up once at the beginning of March, ... [snip!] ... the thought that if I do it again I can become pregnant is enough to keep me from doing it. ...If that makes any sense...lol."</blockquote>




Oh, I thought based off the pic you're having sex w/ someone but making them think you're on the pill, to try & get pregnant. It's your deal either way, not trying to argue or anything in this thread. That does suck about BD though I'm sorry