Forums > Labor & BirthPage 1 2by: Sakeenah

My son's birth a death

posted 4th Jul

Yusha born on the 29th of June 2009 at 9:46am weighing 1.6kg (3lbs 8oz) and 42cm long with auburn hair and blue eyes,
he left this world at approximately 10am living 15 minutes of love in the arms of his mother and father.

On March 24 2009, i heard the beginning of his story, At my routine 20wk ultrasound i found out my baby had potters syndrome, he was missing healthy tissue in his kidneys and lungs causing them to be underdeveloped and "incompatible with life" had an enlarged heart and was lacking alot of the amniotic fluid that would normally surround him cushioning him and allowing him to move freely.
We were immediately sent to a specialist who told us there was no chance of our baby surviving and that it would be best that we end the pregnancy, I declined. It took me over 12months to get pregnant this time including 6months of peeing on expensive ovulation tests and 6months of taking my temperature at 6am, i wasn't about to give up my baby because things weren't going so well with his insides! He was ours from the moment the creator of this fast and ever expanding universe ordained it so.
There were moments when I worried that maybe i should let him go. I didn't want him to suffer, Were we selfish for trying to keep him here? all i know is That his death was not a decision for me to make.
From then on i cherished every kick and squirm, talking to my belly about how the washing machine worked and what a ripe tomato should smell like, all the things i would have said during his life time.

At 34wks I went into labour, it was Sunday the 28th of June 2009 just before midnight, i thought it was just false contractions as i had been having them for the past few weeks but by 5am i had to get up and have a shower cause they were so bad, once i was out of the shower i woke up my husband just before 6am and called my mum to come watch naima (our 2 and a half yr old), then i called the hospital to tell them i was coming in,
My mum arrived my husband put my suit case in the car and we were on the way to the hospital, my contractions were 4mins apart but by the time i got there 30mins later they were just under 3mins apart.
we sat around the waiting room of Women's Assessment emergency as other happy and excited couples came in to be induced. i sat there controlling my breathing as well as i could taking deep breaths and trying to relax.
When i was finally seen by the midwife she hooked me up to the monitor for a while making conversation between contractions, then her shift was over so another midwife came in and said i looked a "little distressed" during contractions and asked if i wanted any panadol saying they were only "mild" contractions possibly because i wasn't screaming "DRUGS!" or throwing things at my husband.
I declined the panadol offer and sat on the bed to be inspected by the doctor who said i was already 9cm dilated and i better get up to the delivery suite cause the baby will be here very soon.
As soon as they got me up stairs and on the bed i felt the contractions become even more intense and i knew it wouldn't be much longer, then i yelled "I NEED TO PUSH! CAN I PUSH NOW? I NEED TO PUSH!" and 2 pushes later he was out BUM FIRST! the midwife handed him to me and i asked what the sex was, she said he was a boy and my husband and i looked at each other surprised as we told at the ultrasound it was a girl despite the fact that right from the beginning i knew he was a boy.
Two paediatricians stood in the corner of the room to help if he started to become stressed but he was just so relaxed. he took a deep breath as my husband cut the cord and made a few kitten sounding cries which were just the sweetest thing i have ever heard, i kept touching his cheek to see if he was still warm then he would take a deep breath i did this until his face went cold, shortly after this the paediatrician checked his heart and confirmed he was gone. i still couldn't believe it, he looked so alive, even as his body turned purple his face was still so bright. Even now as I write, it seems impossible that he is gone.
I am so grateful to have been able to have those 15 minute, they were all i ever prayed for. A minute or a miracle.

My son's birth a death

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