thank you all

thank you all for helping me deal with my super emo moment, i went and held him for a while today and that made me feel a little better. i just woke up in a super bad bad bad mood and just didnt want to deal with life at all.
i mean not even my daughter laughing made me smile. but i am doing better now
i guess it is really my husband being away
my just have having a baby {{hormones}}
my baby being in the nicu and only seeming to digress {{which i know all babys gain weight it just seems like he is never coming home . at the moment and im learning to deal with it.. i guess im lucky couse this is the hardest thing i have had to deal with and i know i will get through this, and every thing will be good again but i have moments where i just really want ot give up and im not going to but every one knows how im feeling right now

and i just want to thank you for dealing with me and helping me...oddly enough baby gaga is one of my main things to help me deal with what im going through right now

There is no way your husband can take emergency leave? I know hes probably in tech school by now but seroiously, he should ask about it,unless he already hase  

I knew several people that got emergency leave for not so emergency type thigns in bmt and tech school.

Quoting Fierce MamaOLS:“ There is no way your husband can take emergency leave? I know hes probably in tech school by now but ... [snip!] ... he already hase   I knew several people that got emergency leave for not so emergency type thigns in bmt and tech school.”

he asked and the only way he can come home is if luke dies...so we dont want daddy to have to come home

Alot of mamas come on PWP for support... and almost all of them leave (i.e. take home healthy happy babies) in no time  

You barely just had your baby, so dealing with that on top of the shock of being in NICU, it's SO normal that you feel this way. Take care of yourself, take it day at a time and everything will be fine.

i am glad your feeling a little better. Its tough having a baby in the nicu exspecially when you dont know what will happen or when.