Forums > Free for AllPage > 503by: ☆Dirty's

Military Families

posted 19th Jun
*PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO READ THIS*
Emotional cycles of Deployment

Stage 1- Anticipation of Departure: In this stage, spouses may alternately feel denial and anticipation of loss. As reality sinks in, tempers may flare as couples attempt to take care of all the items on a family pre-deployment checklist, while striving to make time for “memorable” moment. In the new emotional cycles of deployment, Stage 1 may begin again before a couple or family has even had time to renegotiate a shared vision of who they are after the changes from the last deployment.
Stage 2- Detachment and Withdrawal: In this stage, service members become more and more psychologically prepared for deployment, focusing on the mission and their unit. Bonding with their fellow service members is essential to unit cohesion, but this may create emotional distances within the marriage. Sadness and anger occur as couples attempt to protect themselves from the hurt of separation. In the new emotional cycles of deployment, as this stage happens more often and more frequently, marital problems may escalate. When a husband or wife must repeatedly create emotional “distance”, they may gradually shut down their emotion. It may seems easier to just feel “numb” rather than sad, but the lack of emotional connection to your spouse can lead to difficulties in a marriage.
Stage 3- Emotional Disorganization: With back to back deployments, one might think that this stage of adjusting to new responsibilities and being alone would get easier. Although a military spouse may be familiar with the routine, (s)he may also be experiencing “burn out” and fatigue from the last deployment, and feel overwhelmed at starting this stage again.
Stage 4- Recovery and Stabilization: Here the spouses realize they are fundamentally resilient and able to cope with the deployment. They develop increased confidence and a positive outlook. With back to back deployments, however, spouses may find it hard to muster the emotional strength required, but many resources are available to provide needed support.
Stage 5- Anticipation of Return: This is generally a happy and hectic time spent preparing for the return of the service member. Spouses, children and parents of the service member need to talk about realistic plans and expectations for the return and reunion.
Stage 6- return Adjustment and Renegotiation: Couples and families must reset their expectations and renegotiate their roles during this stage. They key to successful adjustment and renegotiation is open communication. Families also need to be prepared to deal with the effects of combat stress on the returning service member. Such stress and trauma can be difficult to deal with. Troops with combat stress are often irritable, guarded, and want to be alone. Some may use increased alcohol or drugs in a failed attempt to “numb” the emotional pain they are experiencing. Attempts at renegotiation may result in increasing marital arguments.
Stage 7- Reintegration and Stabilization: This stage can take up to 6 months as the couple and family stabilize their relationships anew. As noted with Stage 6, the presence of combat stress can severely disrupt the stabilization process. Reintegration and stabilization can hit more roadblocks when a family must make a Permanent Change of Station(PCS) move immediately upon the return of the service member. Back to back deployments create stress as families stabilize only to begin stage 1 once again.
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I have 2 kids & live in Killeen, Texas
posted 19th Jun
I cant believe we filled up Military Families haha, we talk too much
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I'm TTC since November '09, have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Spain
posted 19th Jun
Quoting Sarah♥SemperFortis:“ I cant believe we filled up Military Families haha, we talk too much”





I know.
Damn deployments!
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I have 2 kids & live in Killeen, Texas
posted 19th Jun
.......................................................................
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I have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in California
posted 19th Jun
Quoting Fierce Mama:“ Anyone know about spouse school grants or scholarships? I'm not tapping into my gi bill until im going for a degree”



I know there is an AF wife that uses them. I will get her link.
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I have 2 kids & live in Killeen, Texas
posted 19th Jun
Quoting Fierce Mama:“ Anyone know about spouse school grants or scholarships? I'm not tapping into my gi bill until im going for a degree”

There are medically specific ones I just cant think of the name right now. Like medical assistant, dental assistant...I think military one source might have some info on them.
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I'm TTC since November '09, have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Spain
posted 19th Jun
good to know. hubby is deployed for the first time.
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I have 1 child & live in Nevada
posted 19th Jun
Dude the dog just totally snapped on my stepdad   


Everyone is okay though
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I'm TTC since November '09, have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Spain
posted 19th Jun
Quoting Sarah♥SemperFortis:“ Dude the dog just totally snapped on my stepdad    Everyone is okay though”



Wow.. That's no good  
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I have 1 child & live in Jacksonville, North Carolina
posted 19th Jun
Quoting Sarah♥SemperFortis:“ Dude the dog just totally snapped on my stepdad    Everyone is okay though”




  
Why?
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I have 2 kids & live in Killeen, Texas
posted 19th Jun
Quoting Bryttny:“ good to know. hubby is deployed for the first time.”




Sorry to hear that. A few of us in here have deployed spouses also.
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I have 2 kids & live in Killeen, Texas
posted 19th Jun
................................
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I have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in California
posted 19th Jun
Quoting Dirty's wife:   Why?”

He was flipping out going crazy because there was a UPS guy at the door just dropping off a package. Like to the point where he would go from window to window barking almost pulling down the curtains. My stepdad tried to reprimand him and Hank(the dog) just started growling and snapping at him.
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I'm TTC since November '09, have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Spain
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