what you weren't told about havng a baby

i did one on pregnany so i thought i would do one on after having the baby and newborns. what were you not told? I will start
the first poop is discusting lol. it's thick and sticky like tar
breastfeeding is not as easy as people say.
and you will make up for the nine months of no periods lol
here's the first post about pregnancy.
http://forum.baby-gaga.com/about581256.html

that sometimes they cry for NO reason

gas drops are your best friend ( i didnt even know about gas drops till my sil got them for me)

the 1390849 cute onesies you bought...he will grow out of faster than you think

heee heee
after a c section..
noone told me the first time i passed gas would hurt like hell..
i called the nurse and told her i think there was a mistake.. theres gotta be another baby in there..
she laughed and asked me if i had to fart.. LOL
felt like labor all over again!

That my crotch would tear like a mofo.
The newborn phase doesn't last as long as they portray on tv.
That amniotic fluid can still be in their lungs and scare the crap out of you in the middle of the night in the hospital because they didn't aspirate all of it.
That you became like a Mother cougar doing anything to protect your baby from harm.
That I'd smell like spoiled milk every day of my life.
That I'd get a shower every 2-3 days.
Most of all, that contractions really DONT feel like just strong period cramps but that your stomach is in a vice and it's not letting go.

Quoting rebecca 757:“ heee heee after a c section.. noone told me the first time i passed gas would hurt like hell.. i ... [snip!] ... theres gotta be another baby in there.. she laughed and asked me if i had to fart.. LOL felt like labor all over again!”

mine didnt?
(thank god)

shoes are not necessary unless they are walking lol. (bought so many she never wears them)

you will not take as many showers as you did before baby so enjoy them when you get them!! lol.

Quoting Kelly[♥ Ethan]:“ That my crotch would tear like a mofo. The newborn phase doesn't last as long as they portray on tv. ... [snip!] ... that contractions really DONT feel like just strong period cramps but that your stomach is in a vice and it's not letting go.”

 about the spoiled milk. ugh lol.

that your stomach will look like jello after you give birth

for the first week or so I could FEEL my stomach jiggle as I walked. It was terrible and I thought I would be like that forever. Thank god I dont jiggle anymore.

Quoting rebecca 757:“ heee heee after a c section.. noone told me the first time i passed gas would hurt like hell.. i ... [snip!] ... theres gotta be another baby in there.. she laughed and asked me if i had to fart.. LOL felt like labor all over again!”t

omg i remember that with my first one i thought i was dying.

Despite the convenient compact size of the pharmacy booger suckers, nothing sucks a booger like the super size hospital booger suckers.

Even dressing a newborn is like wrangling an octopus into a jar. They older they get, the more ferocious the octopus and the smaller the jar.

Even newborn diapers are too big? on an 8 pound baby? Seriously, do the people who make these things HAVE babies?

Everyone will buy your child the loudest most obnoxious toys imaginable. Despite the desire the throw them against the wall until they are in a million tiny pieces, cherish them. Keep them well. Then kindly regift them when said friend has a little stinker of their own. (Kevin... you WILL see elmo remote again. And the singing piano... As an added bonus you can have the ball pit too. Grandpa gave her that one, and on the surface it doesnt seem so bad... until you realise there are 277 balls, and maybe 100 in the ball pit... The other 177? in your laundry, in your bathtub, in your bed, under the couch, remarkably somehow in the stove (Check before preheating) )

No one ever told me how good a crawling 9 month old is at hiding fishsticks to be tended to at a later date thus sending mommy into a screaming panic because she really can't remember the last time she made fish sticks......

That after a c-section (i even heard after natural birth too) i'd be scared to death to poop.

that even baby girls can manage to pee on you too.

They WILL cry for no reason.

Every single sound they make will scare the crap out of you.

They like to poop right after you change their diaper, even if you wait forever to make sure they're done.

LOLeveryone told me it gets easier..
they flat out fuckin lied..
i got a 6 year old that will not leave me alone..
he re-sights movis that he seen over 6 months ago.. on mommy remember that movie with the alien and he came out of her belly. and then...

Ahh I have more..

That newborn sizes really aren't for newborns but like a 1 month old.. unless your kid weighs 10lbs.

The smaller the diaper the more expensive.

While breastfeeding, if you're only pumping you not only have to get up to feed the baby, but also to pump every 2-3hours so you get no sleep.

That i'd be able to sing toy tunes in my sleep

That i'd become an extremely light sleeper, waking at every little noise.

I'd become paranoid and check to see if my child was breathing still.

There's a lot more.. I can't think of anymore at the moment though.

Quoting Kelly[♥ Ethan]:“ Ahh I have more.. That newborn sizes really aren't for newborns but like a 1 month old.. unless your ... [snip!] ... paranoid and check to see if my child was breathing still. There's a lot more.. I can't think of anymore at the moment though.”

SERIOUSLY, every baby clothing maker in the world needs to sit down and decide which size is for which age. Some of Liv's clothes are newborn, are 0-3 month and even some are 3-6 month. But they all look the same size.

Quoting ash & brooklynn ♥:“ shoes are not necessary unless they are walking lol. (bought so many she never wears them) you will not take as many showers as you did before baby so enjoy them when you get them!! lol.”

yes yes....ugh how many shoes i threw away that were worn like once.....