help? baby mamas & people who gave up.

I'm 17 and pregnant. 32 weeks along. So i don't have much longer to decide. But i'm trying to decide between giving my baby up for adoption & keeping her. I was set on adoption, but my entire family is against it. & after talking to them, i'm starting to re-consider alot. I want to talk to people who have gave their baby up. - Did you ever feel any regret? Do you ever feel like you made the wrong choice? - i'd like to hear from people who recently gave up, as well as gave up along time ago. I have friends who gave up recently, & still feel it was what was right. But, i don't want to get married & have other kids down the road & then regret it then. & For people who kept their baby. Was it hard? I just am afraid i'm going to be a bad mother because i'm still young & can't take care of myself. & honestly i'm thinking about it the long run. Like, i feel like i'll miss out on my life completely. How did you make the choice? Help!?

Quoting Shantel41809:“ I'm 17 and pregnant. 32 weeks along. So i don't have much longer to decide. But i'm trying to decide ... [snip!] ... i'm thinking about it the long run. Like, i feel like i'll miss out on my life completely. How did you make the choice? Help!?”

What is your reasoning for wanting to do it? If you have family support that is half the battle.

I've had friends who have both kept, and given up their babies...most of them were also young when pregnant. the ones who kept are glad they did. the ones who gave em up regret it. as long as you have support from your family I would keep it.

Quoting Shantel41809:“ I'm 17 and pregnant. 32 weeks along. So i don't have much longer to decide. But i'm trying to decide ... [snip!] ... i'm thinking about it the long run. Like, i feel like i'll miss out on my life completely. How did you make the choice? Help!?”

I never gave up my kids....but the answer to your ???. Yes it is hard but its something that I had to do. I had my daughter at 15 and yes it was an extremely hard struggle. I would have changed anything, I am so glad that I kept her. It is all your decision, I think you know what is best for you. Good luck on whatever you decide for yourself and your baby!!

Quoting Shantel41809:“ I'm 17 and pregnant. 32 weeks along. So i don't have much longer to decide. But i'm trying to decide ... [snip!] ... i'm thinking about it the long run. Like, i feel like i'll miss out on my life completely. How did you make the choice? Help!?”

well-i didnt give up my child (at 18 ) however...I was adopted and honestly believe that my adoptive parents gave me the best life possible! I dont know what the situation was with my birth parents but I do know that I'm happy they did it for whatever reason...i could have not asked for a better set of adoptive parents. So, if you worried your child wont be taken care of properly, that wont be the case

I have not gave up, but I was only 19 when I go pg with my daughter. Her father was a joke and couldnt even pay the bills. My family was so disappointed. But I can honestly say, all that I have given up for my daughter in my life was totally worth it. One baby isnt to difficult and it sounds like your family will help you and support you. Your seventeen, you can get a job still havea life. Lots of young women do. Dont thin all is over because SO many young women succeed in the same position as you are in. They just have to work a little bit harder.
I will be busting my ass, working full time, going to school and taking care of babies! But I made the decision so I have to deal...
Good luck....

Part of me wants to keep her, but i don't want to keep her just because that's what my family wants. I want to make sure i do what's best for my baby & for me. Part of the reasons i want to give her up - I was raped, & I don't want her to be a reminder of that ( i'm not sure that she will be or not but it's a hard situation ) & I was raised by just my mother, & not that i didn't love my life or anything. but i never wanted that for my kids, i wanted a stable family life. Married, with stable jobs, and a house. I didn't want kids until i was 26. & like i said, i don't want to be a bad mother, because i'm still learning to take care of my self. & I know it's completely selfish, but I really don't want to miss out on my life. I don't want to have to give up all my friends & relationships. I just never wanted a baby at this time in my life. But, at the same time i want to keep her. I am very careful at picking adoptive parents, but you can honestly never know those people. They could end up getting a divorce in a year. Or the mom could end up going crazy and like beating my baby. You never have a for sure garentee. & i really don't want to live with regret my whole life. & i don't want to look at pictures & feel like, i really could have raised her. And just be upset my whole life. & if i did give her up, & what if i get married in 3 years & have another kid. & then look at that kid & be reminded of the baby i gave up, and regret it everytime i look at that child.

Adoption should be considered when you know you cannot take care of the child, and provide basic needs and the love the child needs, there are always other couples out there that cannot have a baby of their own, that would love to adopt.

I honestly wouldn't be able to live my life if my son were somewhere else but with me.

it's all up to you.

I'm 18 & I kept my son. It's hard some days, but honestly not as hard as I expected. I love my son more than anything & I'm glad I didn't give him up. However, for some people it's the best choice. It really depends on how you feel, your situation- that kind of stuff. Good luck!

Quoting DeannaJ☮y & Troy!:“ Adoption should be considered when you know you cannot take care of the child, and provide basic needs ...

It's not about basic needs. I have plenty of money in a college fund that can be used to help support us. & i will be able to provide love & food & shelter & everything like that. It's just, i know some people that have kept their kids & they are such bad mothers. I know that's awful to say. But they'll talk about how they were out drinking all night & they just left their baby with their grandma. I don't want to miss out on my life, & i know i won't be like her. But i'll still have to have my baby spend alot of time with my mom and with my family because i'm going to graduate & continue working. But, i just don't want to have my child, & then pawn her off everywhere.

Too the people that did keep their babies. - If your young.
Do you feel like you miss out on your life? Have you ever thought that you made the wrong choice? & if anyone of you are single parents, i'd like to hear from you too. especially since that's the situation i'll be in. I just, i know what it's like to be raised by just one parent. But, did you feel like you weren't enough for that child?

Quoting Shantel41809:“ It's not about basic needs. I have plenty of money in a college fund that can be used to help support ... [snip!] ... i'm going to graduate & continue working. But, i just don't want to have my child, & then pawn her off everywhere.”

I understand what you're saying.
that's a hard choice. I'd rather be a mother than go out and drink though.
maybe that's just me though.

Quoting Shantel41809:“ Too the people that did keep their babies. - If your young. Do you feel like you miss out on your life? ... [snip!] ... be in. I just, i know what it's like to be raised by just one parent. But, did you feel like you weren't enough for that child?”

Honestly I can't say that I missed out on a lot. There were somethings that I couldn't do but that was the choice that I made and I am happy that I chose to do that!!!!

I am 18, and was 17 when I became pregnant. I think if you have your family's support that is the best thing when keeping a child. It is hard at times, you can't just grab your purse and leave, but I feel like having my son and keeping him is such an amazing experience. It's hard to imagine what I did before he was here. Whatever you choose, I wish you luck and if you need to talk to someone, feel free to PM me :]

Quoting Shantel41809:“ Too the people that did keep their babies. - If your young. Do you feel like you miss out on your life? ... [snip!] ... be in. I just, i know what it's like to be raised by just one parent. But, did you feel like you weren't enough for that child?”

My son is only 8 weeks old but I do not feel like I miss out. I have a boyfriend who is not the father but accepts my son as his own. We have date night where we go out on our own, ect. Of course we don't drink and party, but we still have fun.

I think the best thing is, if you love your child and think you might have any regret then don't do it. You have a loving family it seems.

As for being a reminder to rape, I was raped at 14 and did not become pregnant but other things remind me of it, so even if you do not keep your child there is always something that can make you think of it, as awful as it is. Im really sorry to hear it happened to you.