Sad and Confused. (a vent)

Ok, so...right around the time I moved to PA, I lost contact with one of my best friends from High School (she moved to FL around the same time). I got back in touch with her about a year after that. Her life was going good. She had just had a little girl and was engaged to be married. She told me she was moving back to NJ (where we are both from), and we both said it would be fun to get together. Unfortunately that never happened. We lost touch with each other a again, and the only 'contact' I had with her was through a mutual friend that would give me updates (but would never give me my friend's contact info).
Well, I finally found my friend on Facebook a couple months ago, so I sent her a message. She never sent me one back. I tried one more time to send her a message and she finally wrote me back. Basically she said that she didn't reply, because she wants nothing to do with me.

I don't understand it. We lost contact, yes, but it's not like we had a major falling out or anything. We never left on a sour note. We just simply - lost touch. It hurts and confuses me as to why she doesn't want anything to do with me. I am seriously crying over this. She was one of my best friends. I think about her all the time, and always regret that we lost touch. We used to always say about having kids at the same time. And now we both have daughter's.
I don't know...it just makes me so upset. I had to vent to someone....

did you ask her why she doesnt want anything to do with oyu? maybe someone you both know is feeding her bullshit about you? that's what happened to my hubby. him and his best friend stopped talking for 4 years because his friends ex gf was telling him all kinds of shit....

Quoting Maddy&Dylan's Mommy:“ did you ask her why she doesnt want anything to do with oyu? maybe someone you both know is feeding her ... [snip!] ... my hubby. him and his best friend stopped talking for 4 years because his friends ex gf was telling him all kinds of shit....”

I just wrote her back about 10 minutes ago, so I didn't get a responce. It's possible that someone could be saying shit to her, but I'd have no idea who.

It just frustrates me.

I have a similar situation. I lost contact with my best friend of 9 years whenever I moved here too. Although we were only 2 hours away from each other, with going to school, working, me getting married, etc it was so hard to ever make it back home. And when I did, it was primarily to see my family. When I asked her to be in my wedding, she wouldnt respond to me. She finally after me trying to hunt her down about why I hadnt heard from her, she sent me an email saying that "she didnt know if she could stand up for me in my wedding because she felt like she didnt even know me anymore" (She also mentioned something about the fact that she heard that my fiance-now husband- was beating me! WTH! That came out of left field, it was totally made up and she had never mentioned anything about even "hearing this"before then...But that is a whole nother issue in itself) . Anyway, We hadnt fallen out of touch, it was just that we werent together every minute of every day like we did when we were younger. That's what happens when you get older and become engaged/married etc! I was terribly hurt and upset about it so I responded with something about I was retracting the offer of being in the wedding and I would find someone who cared enough and would think of it as an honor to be in my wedding blah blah blah. Nothing mean, but to the point that I was very hurt by her immaturity. Anyway, I havent spoken to her since, and it really really bothers me still to this day. As a matter of fact I had a dream about trying to contact her last night. Sorry this is so long, It's kind of like my own rant. I just found it coincidental that you posted this whenever its been weighing on my mind too.

Quoting MommaOfAngels~MJL:“ I have a similar situation. I lost contact with my best friend of 9 years whenever I moved here too. ... [snip!] ... It's kind of like my own rant. I just found it coincidental that you posted this whenever its been weighing on my mind too.”

Ugh, it sucks so bad. I responded as sweetly as I could. I just said "I don't know what I did to make you not want anything to do with me, but I just want you to know I think of you often and wish you all the best."
I just knocked the ball in her court. If she wants to try to patch things up, it up to her. If not, I guess I just have to move on.

I met this girl in February through my hubby and his work. We started getting pretty close. She even did my baby shower for me...I dont have a lot of girl friends so I asked her to be in my wedding. Her and one of her friends were both in my wedding. But my wedding day was the last day that I talked to either of them. They wouldn't return my calls or anything. And the last thing said between us was *good luck, I'll call you*
I dont know wth happened, but when I tried to ask her about it she didnt return my email... and I know we weren't friends for very long, but we were getting pretty close and then she just stops talking to me?? wth?

Quoting Maddy&Dylan's Mommy:“ I met this girl in February through my hubby and his work. We started getting pretty close. She even ... [snip!] ... and I know we weren't friends for very long, but we were getting pretty close and then she just stops talking to me?? wth?”

I hate when people just cut you off without so much as an explanation!
I value friendship a lot, bc I don't have a whole lot of friends. This girl was my best friend from 7th grade until about 4 years ago (we were friends for 6 years total). Last time we did actually talk it was very friendly. Now all the sudden...she all but hates me. I just dont get it.

Quoting Julia's ♥ Mama [Wo:“ I hate when people just cut you off without so much as an explanation! I value friendship a lot, bc ... [snip!] ... Last time we did actually talk it was very friendly. Now all the sudden...she all but hates me. I just dont get it. ”

I'm the same. I value REAL friendship a lot and give everything I can to all of my reltionships. I hate when people just cut you off without explaining too

Quoting Julia's ♥ Mama [Wo:“ Ugh, it sucks so bad. I responded as sweetly as I could. I just said "I don't know what I did to make ... [snip!] ... the ball in her court. If she wants to try to patch things up, it up to her. If not, I guess I just have to move on. ”

I know it does suck so bad. I was friends with this girl for 9 years! We did everything together! Practically lived with each other, if I wasnt at her house, she was at mine. I mean its like I lost a whole other family because it wasnt just her that I was that close to, you know.

You handled it in a very mature way, so I guess whatever happens happens at this point, you did all that you could do.

I probably could have handled my situation a little better, but with the stress of my wedding and her insulting me enough to think that 1) I am dumb enough to be with someone who abuses me. 2) She doesnt even confide in methese things and goes off of something that she supposedly heard (which who knows if she did or not) and 3) to insult my husband that way when she was around us both? Whatever. Anyway...Can you tell I still harbor resentment? Its just because our friendship was worth so much more than petty bullcrap like that and for it to be over for such a stupid reason is really heartbreaking.

If you were in my situation (Keep in mind it has been 3 years now) do you think it would be stupid to at least like send a christmas card or something this year?

(Im sorry, I am of no help to you! I am even asking YOU for help! Ahh I am a mess!) Yours really sucks though because there is really no closure. I mean you dont even know what brought this on. Hopefully she gives you some kind of reasoning.

Maybe she is going thru a lot of stuff and is pushing her close friends away bcuz she doesnt want them to know...i knw ppl who have done that b4...

Im sorry that she did that to you Cass