baby shower.. family issues.

So today is my baby shower. thats supposed to be a suprise.. but that didnt last cus my friends dont know what a effin SUPRISE is.

my BD's family is throwing it for me .. they are amazing.. i couldnt be luckier to have them.

I was supposed to have one here in philly (where i live)and one in wilkesbarre (where my whole family lives besides me and my dad) .. i havent really talked to my mom my whole pregnancy. but i still invited herto the one in philly cus she is my mom and should be there.. along with my sister.

well it came down to it that no one had the time or cared enough in my family to give me one in wilkesbarre. so my dad had to invite the rest of my family by phone with barley any notice. i feel horrible.

so today i was talkin to my bestfriend since i was in 2nd grade and she is supposed to be the god mother she lives in wilkesbarre (2 hours away).. she tells me she has to work until 4 and then she will be here.. she isnt gonna get here until at least 7 .. whats the point of even coming? she knew months ago and could of taken off work.

My dad told me tonight that my sister isnt coming cus she doesnt have the money .. but i just saw her last weekend and she got highlights and went shopping.. that makes me really upset cus even if we arent really talking right now this is still her niece and im still her sister she should be the first person here.

i dont think my mom is coming either.. && my dad who i asked to be home this weekend and not go to wilkesbarre to go hunting .. left tonight to do exactlty what i asked him not to.. so im home alone .. and since there are gonna be guys at the shower too i asked my dad to be there. but he isnt ..

am i wrong for being upset?? like they are my family they should be the ones actually throwing the baby shower. maybe its just the hormones but i found my self breaking down early and just crying cus i feel like no one even cares..

this is exactly why i am not having one, mine was supposed to be on the 12th, and my mum was going to plan it, but she decided that she is not going to come down to do it.
And then i hear my oldest sister wont be coming because, oh i have no money she gets like $800 one week and $300 the next, that is more money than I get and she still cant afford it, yet i can afford to save alot in the bank, I never need to ask for money.
I just stopped my job today and was only ever getting less than 10hrs a week at work anyways but she has the nerve to ask me to borrow $100, sorry not happeneing you get more money than me and 2nd you cant even do one small thing and show up to my baby shower.
Then my second oldest sister says she aint coming, she says her car broke down, they have 2!! but it is just because her and mum dont get along so she dont wanna see her, selfish!!
Then my sister who is 11mnths younger than me says she dont have enough money to fly her and see me, then i hear she has just spend $300 to go out drinking one night,
Grr family are annoying, and my friends just had babies so they will use them as an excuse not to come. I do everything in my power to help out my friends and family, then they cant even show to my shower, well I wont be having one now thanks "friends & family" yous are all wonderful!! SORRY MY VENT havnt been able to do this in a long while.

No you're not wrong for being emotional.. I understand how you feel. My family never threw me a babyshower and most of my family couldn't even drive between 2 hours and 30 minutes to come see me when I visited during my pregnancy and majority have yet to see Aidan   And it hurts.
Not only is this your family, your support system and those who are ALWAYS supposed to be there for you, but also your baby's... and you want them to be excited and celebrate that with you... I don't understand some people and their lack of consideration but I know that, well, it sucks.

My grandmother also bought ALL of my cousins cribs for their babies but hasn't done a single thing for me. All because, well, I guess she expected more out of me than them so to her, for me to have married early and had a child instead of living up to my "potential" is both a failure and a slap in the face to her... not sure how and I can't say her logic makes any sense to me considering my life is certainly not over at 21... but still...

Quoting Waiting on my baby boy:“ this is exactly why i am not having one, mine was supposed to be on the 12th, and my mum was going to ... [snip!] ... having one now thanks "friends & family" yous are all wonderful!! SORRY MY VENT havnt been able to do this in a long while.”

wow. and their your sisters they are the ones who are supposed to be the most excited and want to share this with you .. it hurtss i never would of expected it from my sister... but i also wouldnt have expected anythng she has done in the last 8 months.. ! im sorry about your sister and friends.. i guess i need to look at this positivly i do have another family who wants to give me everything but .. idk they just arent my family.

Quoting ElastigirlMJL*NObama*:“ No you're not wrong for being emotional.. I understand how you feel. My family never threw me a babyshower ... [snip!] ... not sure how and I can't say her logic makes any sense to me considering my life is certainly not over at 21... but still...”

yea.. that really sounds like what im goin through.. thank you for understanding.. people say that friends dont last but your family will always be there i really dont think i agree with that anymore. && you know its not really cus you want them to be there for you but for well your son. i feel like my daughter is gonna be punished and feel unloved by my family cus im 16 and i didnt live up to my potential either.. but really my baby is my new potential .. being a mother is what my life is based on ... i will still go to college one day and finish my goals .. but just cus they are put on hold or are harder doesnt mean im not gonna do them.

Quoting Melissa + a baby girl:“ yea.. that really sounds like what im goin through.. thank you for understanding.. people say that ... [snip!] ... go to college one day and finish my goals .. but just cus they are put on hold or are harder doesnt mean im not gonna do them.”

exactly. The only person who really seems to think I'm ruined for life is her... though I know my parents expected more of me...I worked hard despite a lot of really serious issues to finish school at a local college, made dean's list every term... I was accepted into this Duke University talent program for gifted students when I took my first ACT in 7th grade...

I had dreams of really doing something important in the world and I think my family shared those dreams... but they understand that right now those dreams have changed for a little while. My great dreams now include being an amazing mother, which is just as notable as being a great politician, or an academy award winning actress, or a zoologist, whatever it was I was going to do, if not MORE so...

And I think it's important for your family, AT LEAST your family if noone else to be there for you whatever you choose to do, and to be there for your baby from the very beginning to build that solid family foundation... it's only fair to BOTH of you that they do that. And one would think they'd would be thrilled to take on that role and responsibilty but I can't tell you why some poeple aren't...

Quoting Melissa + a baby girl:“ So today is my baby shower. thats supposed to be a suprise.. but that didnt last cus my friends dont ... [snip!] ... shower. maybe its just the hormones but i found my self breaking down early and just crying cus i feel like no one even cares..”

thats sucks i am sorry , my mom planned my and the invitations have literally been sent out last week (my shower is on the nov 2nd) but i have been telling people since august what the date of it was , so a friend calls me today saying she has a class that day ! (she is taking a dia de los muertos ) so she is already like i will be late ! Its like i told you months ago ! i hate when people do that , but i hope they are all lieing in your case and surprise you!

Quoting Dec.7th tooo Far![FTP]:“ thats sucks i am sorry , my mom planned my and the invitations have literally been sent out last week ... [snip!] ... ! Its like i told you months ago ! i hate when people do that , but i hope they are all lieing in your case and surprise you!”

isn't that kind of like I'm not sure but the mexican version of halloween?? Day of the Dead?? I've heard it before... I think, of all places, Lizzie Mcguire... lol!!!

Quoting ElastigirlMJL*NObama*:“ isn't that kind of like I'm not sure but the mexican version of halloween?? Day of the Dead?? I've heard it before... I think, of all places, Lizzie Mcguire... lol!!!”

lol yes its the celebration of the dead , it translates to day of the dead , where they have parades, candy and big celebrations to honor the lives of those who are longer with us ... its actually a really cool thing to learn about but i told her about the shower like 2 months ago ...

Quoting Dec.7th tooo Far![FTP]:“ lol yes its the celebration of the dead , it translates to day of the dead , where they have parades, ... [snip!] ... are longer with us ... its actually a really cool thing to learn about but i told her about the shower like 2 months ago ...”

yeah I'd be pissed... hell this is your BABY SHOWER a celebration of the life you are creating... she can google it if she really wanted to learn, lol

 It sounds like these baby showers are more of a stress to us pregnant women than a happy event. You know, dont worry if no one comes to your party like you would want them to. Just be polite, and show up and do what you think is best for you and your little baby. I didnt want one to begin with cus I dont like all the attention and embarressment. My sister in law ask me when I was about 3 months pregnant, and I told her that I didnt want one cus I just didnt feel up to it, and I didnt feel right about getting gifts, etc. While as months went by, a sweet little nurse at the old folks home I work for asked me if she could give me one. At first I said nothing, I didnt want one, but then I gave in cus she said she really likes me. I dont have a lot of family up here besides my dad and brother, so I felt it only right that my friends come from work after all we see eachother every day. So now, my sis in law is hurt that I didnt let her throw me one and she thinks that I was rude to allow this other lady to give me one instead. If I would have let her throw me one, I still would have let this lady give me one too. Im not really worried about it, Im just going to go to this baby shower and write in down in my book to my baby and tell her all about it, minus all the drama in between. My husband, and dad dont want to come, and I was upset at first, but now I dont care. Im just happy to know Im taking a step I wouldve never taken before and it will be an adventure. We shouldnt be hurt by people if they can or cant come, at least you invited them, and at least you tried. Theres nothing more you can do, this is a time to celebrate the coming of your baby, so be happy!!!

Quoting Jez:“  It sounds like these baby showers are more of a stress to us pregnant women than a happy event. ... [snip!] ... and at least you tried. Theres nothing more you can do, this is a time to celebrate the coming of your baby, so be happy!!!”

you are totally right ! to be honest i am very bitter about people who flake i just get irritated when people are like "i'm gonna come ! " and then bail out.. but honestly i am sure once the party starts and i am stuffing my face with guacamole i wont care lol

Quoting Dec.7th tooo Far![FTP]:“ you are totally right ! to be honest i am very bitter about people who flake i just get irritated when ... [snip!] ... ! " and then bail out.. but honestly i am sure once the party starts and i am stuffing my face with guacamole i wont care lol”

LOL... I hope my party has guac! You have the right attitude  

Quoting Jez:“ LOL... I hope my party has guac! You have the right attitude  ”

oh yeah my party is having guac ! my mom is getting mexican food cantered yum! i wanted it just for the possibility of guacamole to be there lol. so how is the baby ?

Quoting Dec.7th tooo Far![FTP]:“ oh yeah my party is having guac ! my mom is getting mexican food cantered yum! i wanted it just for the possibility of guacamole to be there lol. so how is the baby ?”

What an awesome mommy!! My baby is great... she is giving me bad acid reflux at the moment, and I cant lay down cus of it....