about my babies father..

well it started when i was 17 i was into bad things,did drugs,smoked,drank the whole lot but im glad to say i dont anymore!verry proud but anyway...i met my babies father through this lifestyle and i new straight away hes not the type of guy i wanna be with but lady luck blessed me with this beautiful baby thats half his.........ANYWAYS, he says he wants 2 be apart of my childslife and for a while i thought thank god!!cuz ive grown up without a dad and i hated it and never wanted that for my baby and i neva wanted 2 raise her by myself but the thing is i found out not so long ago that he shot up my little sisters friend with chrystal meth!shes 15 and i cant tell u how mad i was and he new verry well i was rethinking him being part of her life...and then wat he does THIS weekend he gives my baby sista who im very protective of the same drug and thank god she hated it and i just cant believe he would do that wouldnt he be trying 2 win my forgivnes??and he denies it of course but i believe my sis anyday over him and it hurts so much cuz he said he would change for us......and im almost 9 months now n was thinking my baby would have a dad and i want her to soo bad but not him of course and im sorry for making this a long post but i hd 2 get it out........and i also feel betrayed by my sister whos only 15 but she new how i felt and how angry i was with him n wat that drug does....and the scary thing is he is 26 yrs old why is he hanging out with such young girls and it makes me soooo sik 2 think he did that!!definately not right in the head,hes a grown man he should no better anyways can i hav some advice?Cuz wen i talk 2 him he acts really excited bout the baby n yeh....its hard

Wow, I'm so sorry your going through this, but you have to stay away from him, for the sake of your children, it sounds like he's really caught up and thats not something you want to be going through with a new baby, let him tear himself down, but don't let him bring you or your children down with him

i would not let him be a part of ur childs life. its not like hes smokin weed he does crystal meth. thats no good. u need to tell him to grow up or he will have nothing to do with ur baby except child support. who knows u might meet someone new who wants to b there for ur baby. i would rather my son not have a father than have one who is unreliable and untrustworthy. good luck girl

Personally I would never let him be around my baby even if I cared for him. Because he would be part of who I was not who I am. You are trying to do what is best for your baby do you think a guy shooting up drugs to 15 yr olds is right? If not then I would seriously consider a restraining order or something because I would not want him even around me pregnant you know? If you have changed for the better why can't he is basically my point. You need to show him that you mean it and tell him to act like the father he should be.

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You and your baby are better off without him! I grew up without my real father who was/is a druggie. I was adopted by my stepdad and I am so thankful for that.

all I can tell you is that the baby does need a father in thier life....But then again if he is around drugs doing drugs or anything of that sort you dont need him......He needs to know that his child should be more important then drugs and that if he wants to be in this childs life then he needs to give all that stuff up like you did...I cant tell you what todo and seems like you are having a tough time right now and I do hope everything works out for the best, Good luck hun...

You can always take him to court and get him allowed only supervised visits. It would probably be better off to leave him out of baby's life. If you plan to keep him out I would suggest him signing off paternity so that he will never have any rights to the baby. He also won't have to pay child support, but if you make him pay support, he will always have the right to fight for partial custody, which I'm sure he won't get, but you will still have to go through the courts.

if he's doing hard drugs like that, or thinks its okay to shoot up 15 year olds with drugs, you need to stay the hell away from him. that's insane. i know every kid should have a mother and a father but if he's like this, your baby is better off without a father. you don't want your child exposed to those drugs....or down the road, him getting the baby high to make it shut up or something like that. (ughh i read too much CNN) people are just crazy.

yeh i definately no im betta off without him i just wish i new this 6 months ago!!its just to shocking and stressful to find it out in the last week n i dont wanna stress cuz i dont wanna go into premmie labour but its hard 2 just put on a brave face and act like everythings ok

Quoting Bonie_boo:“ yeh i definately no im betta off without him i just wish i new this 6 months ago!!its just to shocking ... [snip!] ... i dont wanna stress cuz i dont wanna go into premmie labour but its hard 2 just put on a brave face and act like everythings ok”

Its okay my first pregnancy the same thing happened i was 16, the dad was a abusive jerk and I left him. I lost her but I was also being abused lol...you hopefully don't have that issue, but, I know it would be easier if we could see what lies ahead but that would be no fun because it would ruin the best things in life.

Quoting Ellie1303:“ Its okay my first pregnancy the same thing happened i was 16, the dad was a abusive jerk and I left him. ... [snip!] ... know it would be easier if we could see what lies ahead but that would be no fun because it would ruin the best things in life.”

no hes never abused me....but i stil feel i dont even no him that well...I feel so guilty i always promised myself my baby would have a daddy...

Quoting Bonie_boo:“ no hes never abused me....but i stil feel i dont even no him that well...I feel so guilty i always promised myself my baby would have a daddy...”

That is a great choice to want a father figure. I did not meet my father until I was 11 then my mom made me tell him that I did not want to see him anymore. I reloacted him at 16 and moved out of my moms. He turned out to be a jerk but I stil talk to him and he is just now getting used to me being in his life and now I am 20. I don't really think you would like a bad father for your baby personally. I think you would be better off without him, but it is your decision in the end. I really believe a father is someone who takes the time to make the necessary change needed to bring a baby into the world. And to me your childs father is not doing that at all. I would try a pro's and con's about the father and see if he is suitable to be around your child but that again is just me. I know a lot of men have changed even my husband...he used to never be sociable and now he is because he knows in the future the baby will need him at some point whether it be at school a child's birthday party, etc.., I think you are taking the necessary change but some people are not fit to be parents, they will show you over time, if they will be or not. If he treats you well then expect that for your child but if not I wouldn't want my child to be around him...if you can understand that. Well you can message me whenever you want I am always online. Well ttyl
ME

Quoting Ellie1303:“ That is a great choice to want a father figure. I did not meet my father until I was 11 then my mom ... [snip!] ... child to be around him...if you can understand that. Well you can message me whenever you want I am always online. Well ttyl ME”

thanx 4 tha advice   xx

Quoting Bonie_boo:“ thanx 4 tha advice   xx”

No prob. Keep in touch and tell me how things are going ...