PTSD

so my fiance got back from Iraq about a year and a half ago..
today he gets something in the mail about PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder). a place is doing a study on guys in the military who have been overseas and also giving them help.i have been telling him he's needed help because he has anger issues.
it is never torwards me or the baby... but if he dies on a video game he'll throw the controller and dent the wall or if he fixes something it and breaks again he freaks outs.. if anything just rains a little bit on his parade... he throws tantrums.
he always refuses to drive because when he was in Iraq, he was driving and there was dude on top of the hum-V manning the gun... and someone shot at his vehicle and blew it up. the dude manning the gun died, and my fiance almost died, but someone pulled him out. plus he had to be careful while driving cuz of the mines planted on the sides of the road.. in his head, if he drives on the road here, he tends to drive almost to the point where he's in on comming traffic lanes because he automaticcly thinks to drive away from the mines.

well... im so thankful this letter came. it says that they will even pay him, which is awesome. i think this will be good for him. even though he doesnt yell at or harm me or our baby... the fact that he throws the controller when the game isnt going his way will show our baby that she could do that and she'll end up throwing bigger tantrums than i already anticipate.


has anyones husbands/bfs/bd's/family members/friends have PTSD and been through a treatment?

when my cousin is in the national army gaurds and he his a fuel tank driver. Well anyway when he was in Iraq everytime he went on a convoy he was bombed and narrowly escaped getting kidnaped, and when he came back he turned into a really bad drinker. he underwent treatment and has bbeen doing alot better. they did give him medication Im not sure what it was but he was so depressed he couldnt work for like a year after he came back

I definately think it sounds like he's got PTSD and the study'll be good for him! Good luck to him!

My DH went to Iraq 3 times (got back for the last time in Dec '07) but hasn't shown any signs of PTSD. I do watch him tho since it can show up months or years after they get back so I want to be prepared just in case.

Hope your fiance is receptive to getting help! ((HUGS))

No...my husband hasn't gone through treatment yet but I want to post because he also throws the controller(s) when he's losing during a game on our ps3. I've told him countless times I'll get rid of the games if he breaks another damn controller. It scares me. He'll also throw tantrums and snap and be a smart-ass to me.

I've also noticed he has a short temper when things aren't going well, or dealing with people that are in customer service. (?)

He was a gunner on the Hum-vee, like what you mentioned..and I can't imagine the stress he endured and the violence he witnessed.. He also got something in the mail, and I know I can tell him he should go but it's up to him.

He realizes he has anger issues he should get looked at but it's whether or not he'll admit he wants to go.

Good Luck, to you and your hubby.

Quoting SeemedSoPerfect:“ so my fiance got back from Iraq about a year and a half ago.. today he gets something in the mail about ... [snip!] ... than i already anticipate. has anyones husbands/bfs/bd's/family members/friends have PTSD and been through a treatment?”

I don't know anyone in treatment, just wanted to wish you and your family well! That cannot be an easy thing for either of you to go through; your fiance is a lucky man to have you.  

aw thanks for the support. im just glad that i have a guy who admits that he has had anger issues since coming back from iraq.. and im more thankful that he has never had an anger issue torwards or because of me or our daughter... but you never know what the future holds, which is why he wants the treatment.
it really sucks having to drive him everywhere, especially when i need sleep and he has to be to work at 4am... but id rather drive than have him drive and end up in an accident because he doesn't 100% comprehend that he's not going to get blown up

im also thankful that he wants to do something about it. we had been talking about it, but thought it would cost money and the VA possibly wouldn't cover it... but its even better that they're going to pay him to do it.

Quoting BabyMakin:“ No...my husband hasn't gone through treatment yet but I want to post because he also throws the controller(s) ... [snip!] ... anger issues he should get looked at but it's whether or not he'll admit he wants to go. Good Luck, to you and your hubby.”

Oh my God, everything you just said made me laugh out loud. My hubby has the same issue with customer service people, and I attribute it to his NCO mentality...when he wants something done, it's done at a high rate of speed with no bitching, whining or second-guessing, and now evidently he expects that from everyone all the time. It's seriously getting to the point where he just plain hates all civilians, and embarrasses me in public regularly by getting exasperated with people.

He doesn't throw game controllers (I'm sure he would if I wasn't around but he knows I'd give him an earful), but he yells and cusses at games so loudly that I had totell himto stop before our neighbors start to think he beats me or something.  

On a serious note, though, my husband never scares me and never takes things out on me, and you'd better believe he'd be getting help already if he did...whether he wanted to or not. I sincerely wish you and your hubby the best in finding a solution to this problem; I hope he can admit to himself that hecould use a littlehelp!

Quoting SeemedSoPerfect:“ aw thanks for the support. im just glad that i have a guy who admits that he has had anger issues since ... [snip!] ... it would cost money and the VA possibly wouldn't cover it... but its even better that they're going to pay him to do it.”

Seriously...PTSD is no joke, and it's incredibly sad how many guys can't admit that there's a problem. (They just take up street racing and drink themselves silly and beat their wives.) That is a huuuuuge step in the right direction! I have high hopes for the both of you; it sounds like you're going to get through this just fine.

And you're such a good woman for being so willing to put yourself out to make sure he doesn't hurt himself or anyone else, like with the driving thing! Think of all the guys who come back fucked up in the head who have no one because their SOs have found other guys and such....or they just weren't willing to go out on a limb to help them because of their own immaturity or whatever. So huge pat on the back to you!

(Really I don't mean to be so cheesy, I just really like women who give other military wives/girlfriends a good name, you know? Too often it's the opposite  )

Yeh.. I let him know also if there's little kids with balloons around in public...Sounds kind of retarded if you don't understand but...little kids +balloons= popped balloons...its inevitable..for the civilian that's no big deal, just a loud popping noise and who cares... But for the veteran..he'd be hitting the deck or ready to duck and cover with me in a split second if he heard any loud noises...so I keep him informed so he's not caught off guard..He's already edgy enough in public.

Quoting BabyMakin:“ Yeh.. I let him know also if there's little kids with balloons around in public...Sounds kind of retarded ... [snip!] ... second if he heard any loud noises...so I keep him informed so he's not caught off guard..He's already edgy enough in public.”

Was he evaluated when he came back from deployment? Nowadays they have extensive interviews and paperwork they have to go through as a part of the re-integration process...did he do that? Since you guys are not on an installation I'm thinking maybe he's Reserve or Guard, but...I would think that would still be something he'd go through. He's still in the service, right?

Quoting BabyMakin:“ Yeh.. I let him know also if there's little kids with balloons around in public...Sounds kind of retarded ... [snip!] ... second if he heard any loud noises...so I keep him informed so he's not caught off guard..He's already edgy enough in public.”

when i was pregnant, the obgyn office showed stuff on the tv about parenting and such. this one lady was in the military and had i think 2 or 3 kids. when she came back from overseas she was telling how her neighbor was redoing is roof or something and the nail gun would scare the crap out of her, or even a car backfiring. just little noises like that made her think "omg WAR".

Quoting First Time Go:“ Was he evaluated when he came back from deployment? Nowadays they have extensive interviews and paperwork ... [snip!] ... he's Reserve or Guard, but...I would think that would still be something he'd go through. He's still in the service, right?”

yea they had an evaluation but it was stupid..like herding cattle through a shoot.. They'd check his hearing, make sure he wasn't going to go ballistic and kill himself or others and move on to the next soldier.

The VA have sent him information, and he knows he should go..but it's trying to get him to actually take work off and GO. Sigh.

Quoting First Time Go:“ Seriously...PTSD is no joke, and it's incredibly sad how many guys can't admit that there's a problem. ... [snip!] ... I just really like women who give other military wives/girlfriends a good name, you know? Too often it's the opposite  )”

tyvm. i actually just watched "jarhead" last night and i got pissed off. one of the dudes, his wife sent him a tape of her having sex with their neightbor and all the other guys saw it too.. i actually had my arm in the air pointing at the tv yelling "fucking slutty whore he's risking his life for your freedom and thats what you do. i hope you get aids from the douchebag".. even though it wasnt real
but the stories my fiance told me. ohh lord. married men on the internet talking to other women and saying they're going to travel and sleep with them, promising to be with them, and all that stuff. then when they came back to the states, they slept with strippers, ordered "private dancers" to their hotel room and paid a lot of money to sleep with these chicks. oh, and overseas.. there would be iraqi women who would come sleep with guys if they wanted. my fiance was disgusted cuz who knows how many they've been with and what diseases they have. *shutters*
but he also saw how guys would get divorce papers, letters of women cheating or breaking up with them, women finding out their pregnant and it's 100% not their husbands cuz the husband had been in iraq for months before she got pregnant.

when my brother was a park ranger (also an ex marine) in AZ, he had a woman approach him telling him how inshape and good looking he is. she talked about how her husband had been overseas for a while and just needed some company. so he took her out to dinner and some sort of play at a theatre.... she gave him $350 for spending time with her. he says he didn't sleep with her, but no woman would give up that much without gettin some.