about to lose my mind... need advise

Okay, I just gave birth to my son Sunday (8/24/0 . The first couple of days I stay at my parents house so that my mom could help me out with the baby, because my boyfriend works nights. Well on thru I went back home. My boyfriend has yet to help me out with the baby. I feel like I haven't gotten any type of sleep and he thinks that because he is awake and laying on the bed that he is up with me. Between feeding the baby and pumping between feedings i feel like I about to break down. I haven't really had time to get any kind of sleep. I still manage to cook dinnier for him and keep our house clean and I feel like he jut doesn't understand how much i need his help. Last night they sent him hom early from work so I thought he would go to bed with me and help through out the night. Well he is up all night playing playsation and i'm up with our son. I thought maybe he would want to spend the day together as a family but no all he wants to do now is sleep. I just feel like i'm about to break down and i tired to say something to him about it. All he could say is what do you want me to do. I told him nothing because by now he should know me and know what i expect of him. I feel like i'm a single mother all over again. All I want to do is cry my eyes out.

oh hun I went through the same bull crap! It's frustrating! I had no help from my man, it was horrible so I ended up staying at my parents who helped me out. You should sit down with him and talk to him about how you are exhausted and frustrating it is taking care of him by yourself. You need to make him take over a little bit while you can catch some rest. So try to compromise with him. Or when he gets home just give him the baby and all the bottles and tell him that it's his time to take care of the baby. Good luck.

Poor thing! I've been up with my daughter since the 1st and her dad only has taken her once... and accused me of abandoning them! Coffee is my friend. 

It's crazy because i have told him about how i need his help and just doesn't seem to understand. I'm lso trying to make sure that my 4 year old is getting enough attention. You know i really would love to go back to my parents house but i feel like i have to try and do this on my own. I just thought being with my child father this time around would be so different but at this point i don't know what i'm doing with him. Becasue he just can't seem to get it right and do right by me and his son. You would think this being his first child at the age of 30 that he would want to be more involed!

Ugh, guys are so lame. My hubby was a big help for the first week, and then that was it. I guess he got tired of it or something. He hasn't changed a diaper in months, he never gets up with her in the middle of the night. It sucks.

I definitely know what you mean about feeling like a single mom.
Do you have anyone else that can help you out with the baby, so you can get some sleep, or a break? Like your mom or something?
Once in a while my mom will take the baby so I can get a good nap, or at least some 'mommy' time.
Keep you chin up, though...it will get better and easier. Don't be afraid to kick your bf in the balls, either, lol...tell him he needs to step up.

Quoting Stephanie C:“ It's crazy because i have told him about how i need his help and just doesn't seem to understand. I'm ... [snip!] ... do right by me and his son. You would think this being his first child at the age of 30 that he would want to be more involed!”

yeah tell me about it. It's like men think that since they work they get the easy way out. Keep telling him until he steps up and help. I didnt want to go to my parents either but I was so exhausted it was killing me. Im glad you are wanting to do this on your own, but sometimes you have to turn to your parents for a little bit. It's ridiculous how some men can be. It makes me mad. It's not fair to us.

also going out with your gfs sometimes will help you blow off some steam. It's not good to keep your emotions and frustrations in. When he is off sometimes tell him that you are going out with a gf for an hour or two and that he has to take care of the baby. I do that to my man and at first he will argue about it but I put him in his place and then he will shut up and do it.

i posted a similar situation yesterday, here is the link:

http://forum.baby-gaga.com/about313005.html

Girl, i think i'm at the point that i'm about to kick his ass. Just hit him over the head and mayeb when he gets back up he'll see that i'm just about done! I piss me off because i could have stayed a week with my mom but no he was like that i should be at home because we are a faimly! Faimly my butt! It's like me and my two boys now. I think we are going to have to have a serious talk when later and i'm not sure if we are going to still be together anymore. Because this crap isn't something i'm going to put up with for much longer! He needs to get his head out of his ass and help with our son. Oh yeah and get this. He tried to come at me last night and ask me if i could play with him!

Quoting Stephanie C:“ Girl, i think i'm at the point that i'm about to kick his ass. Just hit him over the head and mayeb when ... [snip!] ... of his ass and help with our son. Oh yeah and get this. He tried to come at me last night and ask me if i could play with him!”

what?? what an ass! he needs to step up and be a man! im glad you are not letting him putting you through this. no girl deserves that. Especially since you have two kids. You cant take care of them both by yourself. I hope you put him in his place. i told my man that if things dont change by next week, im going to leave. he started freaking out and now he is helping a little. so hopefully it will get better.