Ok so I just found out I"m pregnant (YAY!) but on the same hand my hubby and I are having some problems. You see his Dad died and left us a house in the country on 10 acres. Which needs A LOT of work, my mom's boyfriend said it will take about $40,000 to get up to par. So I told my hubby that I would stay in the house because his Dad had dogs that my husband didn't want to get rid of, and there are some shady people in his family (people on drugs etc) that will break into the house if someone doesn't stay in it. So before I knew I was preggo I decided to stay in the house and take some college classes. He was going to retrain for the military into the surgical tech field which is an almost year long tech school. While the guys are in tech school we can only stay with them if they will be at a base longer than 6 months. So what the wonderful Air Force did was break up his school into different bases so that I can't go with him. So now I will be stuck in the middle of some rual countryside during the snowy months. I will have to shovel the longest driveway known to man (all the way through my pregnancy) and if I go into early labor like I did before, no one will be here to take me to the hospital. Oh and we have frequent power outages so if I did go into labor then I might not even be able to call an ambulance.

So I asked my husband to try to change his new job so he wont be gone for so long, leaving me to give birth by myself self (which I've done once already) and raise the kid by myself (until he gets back 4 months after I had it). He refuses to change it and said that "it isn't that hard everyone else can do it why can't you?"

I'm so tired of playing 2nd fiddle to his work. I've spent 3 years of my life waiting to go to school, putting my life on hold for him just to find out that he won't do the same for me.

**Update** I just got off the phone with him. The argument was really heated and he said he was making the decision and that was final. So I told him that I can make decisions like that too and that he needs to go pick up divorce papers from legal. I give my life to someone else when they won't do the same for me. I feel terrible.

i'am srry mama, your in the right though

I'm sorry, what a tough situation. What would he do if he didn't go to tech school? Who's going to be bringing in an income if you're both at school?

Quoting ~~Ali~~:“ Ok so I just found out I"m pregnant (YAY!) but on the same hand my hubby and I are having some problems. ... [snip!] ... to go pick up divorce papers from legal. I give my life to someone else when they won't do the same for me. I feel terrible.”

eek. i don't know what to say. i'm sorry that you have this going on. my husband was like that for a while, talking about single moms being able to do it why can't i? i told him i realize that ppl do it all the time, but i'm not single, and deserve help from him. i'm sorry hun, i hope things work out

Awe Hun! I'm so sorry! Maybe try to have a friend or two move in with you until he gets done?But it's fucked up he doesn't want to be there for the birth of his child. Ask him to schedual school for a later time!

Quoting J e s s i c a:“ I'm sorry, what a tough situation. What would he do if he didn't go to tech school? Who's going to be bringing in an income if you're both at school?”

The military will pay him to do a different job like admin. And then if he wants he can retrain after that. I can go to school on the money his mom set aside for him and he can work for the AF.

I am a military spouse also. I think sometimes the military gets in their heads. I got the best advise from another military spouse on here. Tell him you are not one of his "airmen" and you will not be treated like one. I am sorry he is being like this! PM if you need to chat or vent!

Quoting ~~Ali~~:“ Ok so I just found out I"m pregnant (YAY!) but on the same hand my hubby and I are having some problems. ... [snip!] ... to go pick up divorce papers from legal. I give my life to someone else when they won't do the same for me. I feel terrible.”

oh momma! Does anyone live near the house you would feel comfortable living with and just check on the house everyday? OR about the driveway you could have good ol Army Hubby pay for someone or some company to plow it ever snowy day.

Maybe since you gave him that ultimatum he will change his mind. I wish you the best of luck.

I had that argument with my husband when I first got pregnant. He's military too and work has always come first for him. His unit was trying to send him away for 5 weeks and I was so sick I was in the hospital a few times and I ended up getting so depressed I threatened to end the pregnancy and I went as far as to threaten our marriage and my life. One of his superior officers overheard and said " Let her." It was actually that comment that woke my hubby up and made him realize that family was more important. Ive never asked for much in terms of his job vs family but that was one time I really needed him. Thankfully he managed to pull through. I hope your man does the same.