Shower or no shower???

Ok so I have had a baby shower with my first 2 kids. Then with my 3rd. We wanted to wait till he was born and have a shower/welcoming party. My husband and other have said that I should have a baby shower for our last. I think I should but not too sure. I mean I don't want my child to look at his baby book and ask why didn't I have a baby shower but my brothers and sister did? You know what i mean? Its like we are starting all over agin. My question is do you think I should have another or not? Its really not a question about us getting"stuff" Its more about the celebration... And most the time its just a family gathering. But really who says we should have a shower for only 1 child? Does a book say it? Is it the law? Couldn't I celebrate this birth of a child even if its the 4th. Why not love this pregnancie and birth like my others? I am an Army wife and family isn't around that much. And friends have offerd cause they haven't been around for my others. So just figuring if I should or not. I mean I have time. lol

Well if you have nothing i might be a good idea! i see what your saying and i know that children will ask question but i see no problem with having one at least you will have some stuff for the baby and can always get what you dont get at the shower another day i say have one

I personally have an etiquette issue with having more than one shower. I wouldn't and didn't have one past my first. IMO, especially if your children are planned and you know you donated everything you had you should be prepared to provide for yourselves and the newest addition. It seems to be more and more acceptable to have a shower with each baby under the guise that it's for the baby and how hurt they'll be when they find out they didn't get one, yadda, yadda but showers really are just a thinly veiled way to get people to buy you things.

I know times are changing and that people have multiple showers for each child. I'd say it's up to someone who would be willing to throw you one who doesn't have an issue with it and because they offered, not because you asked for one.

Quoting jnazmom:“ I personally have an etiquette issue with having more than one shower. I wouldn't and didn't have one ... [snip!] ... would be willing to throw you one who doesn't have an issue with it and because they offered, not because you asked for one.”

I agree. I only had one shower with my family so if they felt to throw me another one that would be on them. I wouldn't invite all of my friends because I don't feel it is right for them to have to buy me a ton of gifts each time I decide to give birth. My sister is having her second baby and the last go around my family didn't have a chance to throw her a shower since she delivered at 34 weeks. We are going to throw her a shower since with Joshua we didn't.

OP- How far apart are your children in age?

Quoting jnazmom:“ I personally have an etiquette issue with having more than one shower. I wouldn't and didn't have one ... [snip!] ... would be willing to throw you one who doesn't have an issue with it and because they offered, not because you asked for one.”

Umm hold up. I guess you missed understood me. Or I wrote it out wrong. I am prepared to buy my own baby stuff that is not an issue for me. And also I don't need people to buy me stuff. Yes it would be helpful and nice. But I was really just wondering if I should have a Shower/Celebration for my child. We have celbrations for our kids not to get just gifts but to celebrate their birth or up coming birth. Also I would never ask someone to throw me one that is plain rude. I was offerd. But I haven't said yes or no. And most of our family and friends love to celebrate babies. So I was just asking. Thank you for your imput though. I mean its your personal Opion. And that is what I asked for.

Quoting Monica♥sMcKenzie:“ I agree. I only had one shower with my family so if they felt to throw me another one that would be ... [snip!] ... at 34 weeks. We are going to throw her a shower since with Joshua we didn't. OP- How far apart are your children in age?”

We have an 11 yr old, 6 yr old and 3 yr old. And like I said before I wouldn't even invite all of our friends. But we are all so close that we would invite most. Cause they would be offended. At our last shower it was just family. Andthe people who asked if they can throw one for me are other Army wives that I have only known for awhile. They weren't around when I was preggers with my other kids. And they thought it would be nice since I won't have my close friends or family around me during this time. I know its our choice to have a child and we should be prepared for a baby.. And we are. It is only about celebration..That is all. I don't do things for stuff. Its just stuff to me.

Quoting MW:“ Umm hold up. I guess you missed understood me. Or I wrote it out wrong. I am prepared to buy my own baby ... [snip!] ... babies. So I was just asking. Thank you for your imput though. I mean its your personal Opion. And that is what I asked for.”

What about a baby "sprinkle"? They are more common these days. You can find a lot of info on Google. That way people can welcome the baby-- maybe buy some diapers, small stuff and not feel so obligated to buy expensive gifts for a fourth child.

Congrats & Good Luck!  

Quoting KSmith515:“ What about a baby "sprinkle"? They are more common these days. You can find a lot of info on Google. ... [snip!] ... some diapers, small stuff and not feel so obligated to buy expensive gifts for a fourth child. Congrats & Good Luck!  ”

Never heard of it. But thanks I will look into it. Also it is not to buy things. Its to celebrate

I think it is very appropiate to have a baby shower for each child. Usually the baby shower for your first child is because you're a new parent and need to get things you normally wouldnt be able to afford, and not to mention it brings people closer to you and makes family feel more involved in the pregnancy. As for the second, third and so on.. Those type of baby showers are for the mother/celebration of another addition. Where people come, mainly close friends and family to pamper the expectant mother of yet another child, and play the baby shower games, talk, eat food and celebrate the birth of another child.
(You probably already knew all that, I just wanted to state it for the other woman who read/reply to the thread.)

I think that you should definitely go for it! Not to mention it would be nice to be at a baby shower with other Army wives and such, and they want to do it for you to show they care and want to celebrate your little bean. :]

Oh and as for the lack of having things you need for your new pregnancy, is there any way you could ask your friend to get the things back? That may seem uh, well greedy, but it isnt. You gave her things she would need, and now you need those things again, and there is no point in buying brand-new of everything, when you could just use the stuff you used before.

Quoting Bell Jarr:“ I think it is very appropiate to have a baby shower for each child. Usually the baby shower for your ... [snip!] ... with other Army wives and such, and they want to do it for you to show they care and want to celebrate your little bean. :]”

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! I started to think I miss wrote my point..lol.. I edited my post a bit to get it across that It really has nothing to do with asking people for gifts you know?
And no I couldn't ask cause we live in CO and she is in GA... And we told her that we wouldn't need any of the stuff back cause we wern't 100% sure if we were going to have another. But yeah I have thought about that. I mean she paid us for the stuff. And I would be willing to buy it all back. But its probly worn by now. most the stuff was from the second child. But yeah thanks again for the support..:-)

Well in that case, I'd definitely go E-bay browsing. I really dont see the point in spending over a $100 bucks in store, or online through department stores on items that the baby will most likely destroy, lol.
Like, my crib bedding set I got online at $30.00 compared to $80.00 in-store/online via department.
And things like the high chair and bouncy seats and etc are fairly easy to find at a reasonable price. Just make sure you read the ENTIRE page and description, and look out for disclaimers.
(A guy sold a playstation three for 300.00 bucks. and in the disclaimer, very tiny writing it said 'not actual play station, just the box' and got away with it. people can be tricky.)

Quoting MW:“ Umm hold up. I guess you missed understood me. Or I wrote it out wrong. I am prepared to buy my own baby ... [snip!] ... babies. So I was just asking. Thank you for your imput though. I mean its your personal Opion. And that is what I asked for.”

Yeah, your rewritten version is the exact opposite of the impression I got. Originally you made it a point to say that you wanted to have another shower, that you had given away everything and felt like you were starting over- that to me translated into not a baby "celebration" like you're calling it now- but a traditional baby shower where there is usually a registry and gifts. If you're rethought it and decided to have a party to celebrate the baby that's one thing but I wouldn't call it a shower then.

Quoting jnazmom:“ Yeah, your rewritten version is the exact opposite of the impression I got. Originally you made it a ... [snip!] ... If you're rethought it and decided to have a party to celebrate the baby that's one thing but I wouldn't call it a shower then.”

Yeah I could care less about the gifts. Yes I do feel like I am starting all over again... But we can get our own stuff. We have no problem with that. Also after being a mother of 3 I really don't need much.. I have come realize that we can get stuff as they grow. I mean whats the point of getting all this junk and have to store it till the baby can use it. Like the sausers and high chairs and such.
Anyway, yeah I wasn't saying I wanted someone to throw me one. People have offerd. I just didn't say yes or no... And its still a "shower" A shower isn't just about the gifts. Its about the people gathering celebrating the up coming birth and the mother.