re: why you don't want to be a statistic in wikipedia

I'm 21, going on number 4. My daughter is 7 years old and has been reading since she was 3!!! She's one of the brightest children I know. I was 14 when I had her and all I wanted was to cuddle with her and love her and teach her things. Her 2 year old brother is also very bright and I was still a teen when I had him. His verbal skills are far better than any of his peers and they happen to be older than him by a few months.

I don't have a lot of family support, but I never have, so that's nothing new. I have a wonderful and supportive boyfriend who's in the Navy. I finished high school before having my second, but thats because I had no place to live with my daughter, so my aunt took us in and I had to follow her rules, which meant being on birth control. I married the father of my first 2 but I left him when I realized we'd have no future together. The guy I'm with now acknowledges all my children as his (the baby actually is his and so is the unborn).

I know you think you're helping, but teen moms are sensitive about it, just like Christians don't like to be told there is no God. A lot of people think those statistics are wrong, where do they get their information from anyhow!? I don't see any surveys asking "how intelligent are your children" and "how old were you when you had him/her/them". What young mothers need (I think) is positivity and understanding....loving role models who care and aren't judging them or holding statistics over their heads.

To all the teen moms out there, yes, having more IS hard, especially if you aren't married, (oh and NEVER marry a guy who isn't your dearest, bestest friend of all, not even if you DO have kids together [relationships should have the right foundation or they crumble])and there isn't as much help as people think, welfare isn't free and daycare isn't always an available option,.I would have had to live in a foster home with my daughter if not for my aunt, because I was too young to work AND to young to live in housing for young mothers. My friend who had a baby at 15 had to become a prostitute!
Just remember not to be ashamed, because ANY female who has sex can get pregnant, just because not all of them do it when they're young, doesn't in any way make them superior.Do what you have to do to make money for a clean place for you and your kids. Love your babies, keep them clean and well fed, hug them at bedtime and don't worry about what other people say, you can do as good as any one else with raising kids.

One more thing, I have never done drugs in my life, I had my daughter before I ever had the chance to be peer pressured into things and I knew I had to set an example. She was born at 40 weeks, weighed 7lbs, 7oz, I had a quick labor with her as well. I don't smoke, drink alcohol or even drink coffee, my house is so clean it's boring and the government is helping with food, but only until my boyfriend is out of the Navy (just a few more months) I HAVE worked, but am a SAHM right now.[/img]

im 20 (nearly 21) and although i dont really count as a teeneager, i dont really feel old enough to know what im doing. i believ most of that was true and helpful

HMM...It kinda bothers me when people put teen moms or moms to be down just beacuse there teenagers.
Im 19 and going to graduate from college this April.....yeah i was acepted when i was 17 years old! So you know, being a teen mom doesnt mean were stupid...sleep around and blah blah...thats not always the case. Im with the same man (whi i lost it to) and now were married. Hes in law school (23) so not all teen moms are stupid drop outs as people like to catagorize us!  

Theres one thing i can say and that is most statistics are very innacurate and they are very difficult to generalise, because of the type of people who took part, and the number of people which took part in the survey/study ,upon which the results are based on. Therefore you cannot make a conclusion based upon the results found!It really frustrates me when people do this because i'm 16 and know this-because i tkae psychology for A level (ooo i feel so intellectual lol)

I do believe that it is better for us 'children' to wait before we have our own children. I know people with babies/toddlers the same age as me who don't get it right a lot of the time but i'd like to know any mother which does. I agree that teenagers should wait till they are in a more suitable situation before getting pregnant, however saying that isn't going to stop it from happening. The best society can do is help support these young mothers and help them to be the best they can be.After all telling someone to not get pregnant cannot and will not stop the enevitable from happening!

My baby boy is due on July 3 (i'm 27 wks 4 d pregnant) I hope to be the best mummy i can be and bring up my child well i also hope theres a good few years inbetween now and future siblings being born!

I was a teen mom. I had my daughter when I was 16, 11 years ago. I am now on my second baby.....way later. I graduated high school a year early, when I was 17,...with over credits and my daughter is amazing. I have taken many college courses, changed my major a few times....and will probably be a lifetime student!   I agree, don't be a statistic, don't lose your drive.....the better you make yourself, the more opportunity you give your children 

Hi my name is Cassie. I was a teenage mother at the age of 17. My father and I had a rtough realationship. He was abusive towards me and my mother. I got to the point where i couldnt take his abuse anymore so he kicked me out of the house when I was 16. I met my husband just a month after living on my own. We had our first child one month before I turned 18. He was 21. It was hard raising a child that young and i couldnt have done it without my hubby. We have been together for 8 years now. We are currently expecting our 4th child. It will be our first son. To all the single teenage mothers out there I have alot of respect for you. There is no way way i could have had a child alone. So congrats and good luck mommys to be!!!!!

i disagree with you. it's disrespectful to all young moms to assume that they'll be bad parents and make wrong choices. it can happen to anyone, the rich , the poor, the smart and the dumb. my mother had me young and she's the best mom i know. i'm young and am expecting and i'm still in school and i'm staying in school. teen pregnancy doesn't ruin your life it just puts it on hold... and you can take it off hold anytime you want.

im a teenage mama and i have the support of all my family, friends, boyfriend, and all his family. yess, i consider myself very lucky that i have the support of everyone close to me, and that DOES make it easier but then again i believe that some teenage moms create the problems they face. i am headed to a four-year college after i graduate high school, im in the top 10% of my class, and im involved with many volunteer oppurtunities. im going to be getting my bachelors in nursing, and i plan to start working upon my graduation. even though i am a teen mom, that hasnt stopped me from completing my work, studying, or setting my goals high. if anything, this pregnancy has pushed me to work harder because i know that not only am i creating a future for myself, but a future for my son as well.

you girls are amazing and inspirational! i am so glad to hear these things...

i really do think that teenage pregnancy isn't necessarily even a bad thing-- but that modern society does not give enough support to what is an inevitable biological fact (i mean, it's just a matter of probability if you don't control sex that a certain number of girls will get pregnant quite soon after they get their periods).

i'd like to see more positive roles -- instead of all the doom.

i think the thing that bothers me more than anything else are the stories of young women who get pregnant and then get thrown out of their homes for it-- that is exactly the opposite of the correct response.

keep the good stories coming! prove the statistics wrong!

I am actually very very offended by this posting! I know for a fact that I am going to be an awsome mother! I know mothers who are older (in their 30ish) that shouldn't have children they neglect them and are just all around horrible parents and it breaks me to see those poor children who are put in the middle of it all and I KNOW that I will definatly be a better parent than them. I have already done everything possible to make my baby healthy and happy and to ensure he or she feels loved. I have reasurched everything there is to know about pregnancy and babies , I am going to prenatal classes (both me and my boyfriend who btw is still around and doesnt plan on leaving any time soon) and we both go to all of the doctors appointments.We have more than enough money to support a family , we definatly have enough love , we are both increadibly excited for our new little adition to our family , our familys are excited and I don't know ,Im getting tired of having to defend myself when someone puts me down for having a child at a young age quite honestly.This is increadibly wrong , I'm sorry but I don't really know why you felt you had to post those things about "teenage mothers" if we want to know the stupid , mean and bad things that people say about us , we can go look for it ourselves , lord knows its easy enough to find.

I just turned 18 in march and im due for a baby girl in August 10th and couldnt be happier. Mi story is just a bit different. I actually ended up dropping out of h.s when i was 14-15. Mi father passed away and i just didnt care anymore. Also after he passed away, money got real real tight and mi and mi mom had to move to a cheeper place and sometimes, we have to make sure we save enough for food. However, as soon as found out i was pregnant, i was already in mi 12th week, in Febuary and 17. But as soon as I found out , i made up mi mind that mi baby was going to have someone she kan look up to , so i enrolled in a online highschool program. Im halfway through with it, and could and will have my Diploma by the end of this year. The father of my baby, worked his ass off to get a security job to pull in some good money, but you know what. Money is still tight, and im going to need to go on welfare, wic, and food stamps. I dont care if that makes mi look typicall. Im going to make sure, untill i can get a job after i get my Diploma, my baby is well taken care of. So screw statistics. If you make the right choice, its all that matters.

The post above I have so much respect for you!

And so you shouldn't be ashamed to be on welfare, I am on what we call Child Tax Credits and Child Benefit, not because my partner doesn't earn enough but because you know what, the majority of our country are on it! Not just young mums, My mum claimed it as she had a low income, and my friends mum claims it even though she's on a higher income.

Benefits/Welfare do not make us the typical teenagers at all, it just shows that we are taking responsibility, afterall if you cannot work how else will your child be fed?
I'm certainly not ashamed to admit I claim, because I know I am now a scrounger, as my partner has a brilliant paid job and doesn't want me to work, also the fact that no one round here will take me on for 2-3 months there's just no point in it for me or for them.

I've read all you girls' stories and I admire you all so much, I get alot of bad mouthing for having a second baby whilst still 17. But you know what, me like all of you wouldn't change it for the world, I love the way my life has worked out, and me having a healthy, happy, clean, well fed 2 year old proves how capable I and tonnes of other girls really are!

No one tells you how to be a mother at any age, you have to figure it out for yourselves as do the older mums, therefore we are all equally as able to cope with it.

As someone said the statistics are based on a certain amount of results, were any of us well abled and succesful young mums involved in it? No, it focuses on the negatives not the positives, The world would hate to admit that we are in fact as good a mum as the next person.

Keep sticking to your guns!!! xxx

I fell pregnant when i was 18 (and my bf 21) and gave birth to our beautiful darling girl when i was 19. She is now 4 months old and I am 5 weeks pregnant again. And you know what? I don't care what anyone thinks. We wanted another child. Also our family is a lot better off than most older families.

My BF and I are engaged. We are both wonderful parents and have so much love to give to our children. We are in a great financial position to have children which we earned on our own. We own a 2 bedroom unit which we are renting out, and recently bought a huge 4 bedroom house with all the extra's (ducted air-con, in ground spa, massive entertainment area etc). We own 2 cars, a 42 inch plasma TV and any thing our baby could ever want. I am a stay at home mum because i want to be the one to lovingly raise our children (not a day care provider) and my partner is a tradesman (fitter and turner).

Both our parents are extremely happy that we have given them a grandchild. They adore her. Our friends also adore her.

Now someone dare tell me that we are not in a position to start a family. We are the best parents I know of and can easily afford to raise our children.Teen pregnancy is not all people make it out to be. If you are in the right postion to have children or you are determined to love nuture and provide for your children then i guess it really makes no difference what your age is or how many you want to have.

I do have a friend who fell hard into those statistics...I realize I had help, many of us do...but my friend Casey was 15 when she had her first son and her parents kicked her out, but not because she was a teen mom, but because they were racist and her son was multi-racial. She was too young for welfare, too young to work...I lost contact with her for years...she had to become a prostitute just to take care of her son, she eventually moved into a shelter, was kicked out for drug abuse, became a prostitute again, as well as a drug dealer....her sons father never sees him or pays child support, he has like, 40 kids, no joke. She's now 21 and last I heard was pregnant again, with number 4. None of her kids know their dads, I'm not even sure she does. She keeps her kids clean and well fed, but I fear she'll lose them, since welfare doesn't cover most rents and she's still selling drugs. I haven't heard from her since I heard she was pregnant, but I've had people tell me she said "hi". I don't know where she lives...I don't know if she's still pregnant....I feel so bad for her, but I realize she made her choices to put herself where she is...I just think back to our innocent days, of how we always said "not us"...but here, I'm 22 on number 4, I have it so much easier than her and I almost feel guilty...all she needed was her parents to love her and guide her and she would be better off today  

That is very true. Even though i have had tons of support, I do know that a lot of people struggle.

It makes me sad that she didn't even have the support from her own mother. i know some people may not get along with their mothers but a mother should be the one person who is there for you 100%.

All i know is when my children are older i may disagree with what they choose to do, but i will always stand by them, help them and support with all my heart.