re: why you don't want to be a statistic in wikipedia

I know those statistics are wrong because i am very much so the opposite of those cases. I am seventeen and my due date is two days after i have my 18th birthday. I have finished high school and am in my sophomore year at the local college. yes being pregnant is hard but that is no reason to not finish school, and end up with a future. Just thought i would introduce myself as well.
Tracy  

I agree with a lot that has been said here. That article has facts that are true for many teen mothers, I'm sure. But, it is not the bottom line for everyone. It is extremely difficult for young girls who have no support, but it is still their choice how they handle it. If they wallow in self pity and do not try to make a better life for themselves and their children, they will end up being a statistic. But, with some hardwork, they don't have to be. Encouraging young women in these situations and letting them see that it doesn't have to be that way is the best thing that can be done to help them; not scaring them with dismal statistics.

Also, let's not forget, being a single mother without help is difficult no matter what age you are. I know plenty of women in their late twenties that fall into these statistics. It has more to do with enviroment than the age of the mother.

I am teen mother, but I don't fit into the statistics mentioned here. I am a married stay at home mom who plans on homeschooling all of her children. I got my highschool diploma shortly after turning 17 and got married my wonderful husband (who is twenty-eight) few months later. I became pregnant with my first child shortly after my eighteenth birthday. We had been trying since we got married for a baby and were overjoyed to hear the news. My daughter is now ten months old and I am expecting my second child in September. My husband and I are thrilled; we dream of having a very large, "old fashioned" family. LOL Seriously...we want like five kids.

I didn't read all the pages of this topic, but I did read quite a few. The problem with these statistics and people's biased opinions (and yes, I said biased, because they are) is that you cannot put women into a category simply based on their age. If you could, it would be like saying all white women are the same or all women under 6 feet tall are the same. You cannot generalize a group of people based on one common factor. I am 19 and expecting my first child. My daughter's biological father and I will not be together and he will not be a part of her life but she will have a father figure and definitely no shortage of people to love her. Every single day that I go out in public I deal with people staring at me and the rude comments that they think I don't hear. "She isn't old enough to be pregnant." "Oh look, another stupid teen."
I highly resent all of these comments and am greatly offended. I also have every right to be. I am 19 years old and will not turn 20 until about 2 1/2 months after my daughter is born. However, I am a high school graduate. I graduated when I was 16 as valedictorian of my class. I am currently only about 6 classes away from earning my bachelor's degree. For someone to look at my age and say that I don't deserve to have a child or that I cannot handle it is ridiculous. I am further in life than a lot of people who are in their mid-twenties.
I also have PCOS. My chances of conceiving a child were between 5-7 percent. I have wanted nothing more in my life than to be a mother so I truly consider my daughter a miracle and a gift from God.
People who look at me don't know any of that. They see me and think their thoughts. They couldn't be more off base.
No mother, at any age, deserves to be judged unfairly and it is so sad that society is like that today. I refuse to believe in the statistics that started this post. Any woman who is pregnant, no matter the age is part of a wonderful experience that is life changing and cannot be matched by any other event. Pregnancy is a true mircale no matter what the situation and should be viewed as that.

Thanks for the reply from CFredreen. I need the reassurance that i did not have to get married to the man just because i have his kid. Many people have told me that i am very wrong for not wanting to marry him and that i was being mean to him and my unborn son. Thank you for that.

Tracy

i would just like to say that my grandma was a teen mom, my mom was a teen mom and i am twenty with my first child due in march. NONE of us were or are on welfare, dropped out of school, or any other nonsense that is in that statistic. anyone can be on welfare not just teen moms. when people need help they need help. its good that there is welfare out there for people who need it. instead of looking for ways to put teen moms down and make them feel like failures maybe people should offer support and help for those who need it! how can one say that teen mothers are bad mothers. look at all the crazy women who are put in prison for life because of killing there kids, did you ever notice that all of them are older.
i just wish people would realize what they say and come to the realization that its not based on the age of the person but the mind set of the person.

I'm 18 and almost due... I left school before I got pregnant, so I don't know if half of that stuff applies to me... I did find it irritating being 17 and being classed as a "teenage mother" - what has that got to do with anything?!

My partner is in full time employment, and I will be going back into work after the baby is born...

Yes, we are waiting on a house from the council - but thats nothing to do with the baby, its to do with the RIDICULOUS house prices... Who knows, if I can get a well-paying part time job we may end up renting instead.

My parents arent behind me, in fact they're around 350 miles away from me...but i'm pretty darn capable of standing on my own two feet, and Damien will get all the love he needs when he arrives...

...he already has more clothes and shoes than me!  

Im 17 and pregnant, i am eating the best i ever have in my life, and i dont believe i will be a statistic, i think where a lot of that stems from is that a lot of teens get pregnant, and imagine it being humpty dumpty and the baby being smiles and shine all the time. they dont really see whats going on behind the doors. Im pregnant with my first, but i know this because my little sister i took care of constantly, and i know somewhat of the things to expect. i think that all teens need to here statistics, AND definatley "what to expect for the first year" i read it a long time ago out of curiousity, and although i am sure there is a lot more, it hit it better then their perspectives probably have a grasp on.

The truth is, they expect all this wonderful happy times (which their are plenty im sure) but they dont expect the baby will ever be sick, will ever poo, will ever barf down your shirt in the middle of a mall trip (HAPPENED TO ME ONCE!!!) they dont see all that, so they havew this extreme harsh reality that hits, and they give up more then try.

Haha...yeah i've been warned about the sickness in public places....

My tip for everyone - PUT A CLEAN TSHIRT OR TOP FOR YOURSELF IN YOUR BABYS CHANGING BAG.

That way you can put your messy one in a fragranced nappy(diaper for americans) bag and throw it in the wash when you get home....baby sick STINKS. Actually, all sick does but baby sick seems to be twice as bad lol.

Deotriese wrote: I'm 18 and almost due... I left school before I got pregnant, so I don't know if half of that stuff applies to me... I did find it irritating being 17 and being classed as a "teenage mother" - what has that got to do with anything?!

My partner is in full time employment, and I will be going back into work after the baby is born...

Yes, we are waiting on a house from the council - but thats nothing to do with the baby, its to do with the RIDICULOUS house prices... Who knows, if I can get a well-paying part time job we may end up renting instead.

My parents arent behind me, in fact they're around 350 miles away from me...but i'm pretty darn capable of standing on my own two feet, and Damien will get all the love he needs when he arrives...

...he already has more clothes and shoes than me!  

Haha I know exactly how you feel, I'm classed in with teen pregnancy at age 18, but I left school over a year before I got married or became pregnant (which was after by the way). My hubby has a really nice paying full time job, and we rent our own apartment, we also have a 5 year old step daughter from his first marriage (now THAT classified into the majority of the statistics, but that's not OUR story.)

But my parents live over 670 miles away from us, haha but they're so overly willing to be there for us, which is great, but it's hard when they live sooo far away.

My dad cant stand Daniel for some reason - I think its because he was 21 and I was 17 when we moved in together (22 and 18 now) and we've been together for almost 4 years..... - not to mention my dad was a bit of a control freak!

Daniel and I have been engaged for over a year....We were due to get married on the 20th of next month, but baby Damien James had other ideas! He's due on the 30th lol. As stubborn as his daddy ;)

Mine dumped me about a month after we found out, but he still is helping at least. I was living with him (16 and 20-17 and 21 were are ages while we lived together)

Okay, im pregnant. Okay, im 15. Does that make me diseased or some kind of threat to the society? As for parents kicking their kids out because of pregnancy, hey i was one of them! now im 8 months pregnant with a beautiful baby girl (which by the way, is developing far faster than the average baby) and i live with an AMAZING foster family. GUESS WHAT? i get to keep the baby, NOONE by any means can take your child away UNLESS you are proven to be an unfit mother. WE CAN DO IT! TEEN PREGNANCY IS NOT A DISEASE, EVERY CHILD HAS A PURPOSE ON THIS EARTH. And i feel that i can be a wonderful mother, and finish school, and save money for a home, ANYONE who discourages that, or puts doubts in a teen girl's head should think about what they are saying. Tenns do it all the time, and i can too!
I TOLTALLY AGRRE WITH Duvalmomma!

I think if you work at anything you can beat the statistics. I got pregnant at 16, got married at 17 (to the father of course) and graduated top of my class when I was 18. It's hard but it can be done. Now I'm one of the lucky ones, the daddy didn't run away, I have a wonderful Mother who is a blessing. I'm now 22, and 8 weeks pregnant with my second child. I'm not on welfare, I'm not getting any help from the government. If you take control of your life, take responsibility, then it can work out all fine. I still get weird looks from the old people in my very small, country town. But ya know what? I don't care. I'm a good Mom, I love my son, I'm the one who takes care of him. Teen Moms get a bad rep, but some of us can actually be mature enough to take care of ours kids and I think that should be recognized.