re: why you don't want to be a statistic in wikipedia

I'm seventeen and 24 weeks pregnant, however I am married ( my husband isactive dutyAir Force 4 years), I graduated high school a year and a half early as valedictorian, and have every intension on starting college next august after i have the baby. We will not be on welfare, state insurance, food stamps or anything like that.I dont think that because I am younger I will be a bad mom or my child will suffer,we make 50,000+ a year. thats more than some adults who have kids or even more than one child make. I am emancipated minor because i am married. We have support from both sides of our family. I dont look at myself as a statistic...every situation is different and only nieve people dont comprehend that!

Quoting aidens_mommy_5808:“ i think 12 and up is fine. everyone has their opinions.”

sure, everyone has their own opinions-- hitler had some about jews-- having an opinion doesn't make it correct, well thought out, or safe.

12 years old?? really??

have you thought about this statement?

why 12?

why not 11 then?

i think that as long as a couple is not ready for the possibility of having to deal w/ choosing between abortion, adoption, and raising a child, they have no business having intercourse.

that makes sense.

i'm trying to be reasonable here, but i can't wrap my brain around the fact that someone seriously thinks 12 year olds should be having sex.

Quoting Mara:“ sure, everyone has their own opinions-- hitler had some about jews-- having an opinion doesn't make ... [snip!] ... be reasonable here, but i can't wrap my brain around the fact that someone seriously thinks 12 year olds should be having sex.”

   

I'm shocked, 12?!

I never said 12 was a good age to start having sex. All im saying is every situation is different. I don't think its fair to baseeveryone off of their age because everyone's maturity level is different, wheather they act older or younger. Now i am in no way implying that a 12 year old should be having sex, all im saying is you don't know what that 12 year old has been through in life and it's not your job to judge them. If they think they are big enough to put their foot in the adult world by having sex, then yes they should be willing to make the step in the adut world should they get pregnant or something happen.

Quoting Mr. and Mrs. Kelly:“ I never said 12 was a good age to start having sex. All im saying is every situation is different. I ... [snip!] ... by having sex, then yes they should be willing to make the step in the adut world should they get pregnant or something happen.”

we weren't directing our question to you.

Quoting aidens_mommy_5808:“ they can do whatever they want. and no one is ready for a baby at this afe but now im do a hell of a job raising my son. teens are still people and have the right to choose that they want to do.”

i think 12 and up is fine.
everyone has their opinions.

Yea, teens are still humans since you put it that way but they do not support themselves so I have to disagree with you saying that they can do what they want to do. They do not have to choice to do what they want to do, they are most likely going behind someones back and having sex when they shouldn't be. In my opinion, they have no opinion at the age of 12.

If I am correct, I believe you had said earlier that 13 and 14 year olds shouldn't be having sex?! I say your being biased also.

Quoting Mr. and Mrs. Kelly:“ I never said 12 was a good age to start having sex. All im saying is every situation is different. I ... [snip!] ... by having sex, then yes they should be willing to make the step in the adut world should they get pregnant or something happen.”

I do not think it matters what they have been through in their 12 year old life... they should NOT be having sex.... should not be thinking about sex. !12 years old is no where near adult life, i can see a transition from maybe a 17 year old but a 12 year old?? I do not see anyway that there can be a logical reason.

Quoting Mr. and Mrs. Kelly:“ I'm seventeen and 24 weeks pregnant, however I am married ( my husband isactive dutyAir Force 4 years), ... [snip!] ... of our family. I dont look at myself as a statistic...every situation is different and only nieve people dont comprehend that!”

You are not beating your way around this, I am married also... either way we are still teens. And just like Mara said if you like you do not fall into these statistics then do not feel offended by them. Every situation is definitely different, I will agree with you there but we are still teen moms.

i think this conversation has gotten way off the subject

are 12 year olds even considered teens, they are like pre teens...     

this just has me really confused lol

Quoting MoMMa SuZii:“ i think this conversation has gotten way off the subject are 12 year olds even considered teens, they are like pre teens...  :?:   this just has me really confused lol”

  

I know there are enough replies to this post for a lifetime of reading already ...

I had my first son when I was barely 20. I was frightened beyond belief, and it was incredibly hard being young and being a parent (despite parental help, and a VERY supportive relationship with his dad) .... people said stupid things to me in the store that would leave me in tears (about my age, esp. since I look even younger than I am/was). I remember being in Target and a woman shook her head at me and said bitterly, "Babies having babies." I worked twice as hard to prove I was a decent parent. But I couldn't help thinking of the things I hadn't been able to do yet .... travel the world, live a little, finish college, etc. It was hard seeing all my friends be free to do the things that I wanted to do, too, but couldn't.

Fast forward 9 years ... I'm pregnant with my second child now at age 29. And all I can say is WOW, what a difference a decade makes! I'm in a completely different place, mentally, emotionally, career-wise, everything. I feel so much less afraid and less stressed about the whole thing. I've matured, figured out life, figured out myself ... all those things that age gives us.

I'm happy to have my little boy, and he's the light of my life, but I'd never wish young parenthood on anyone who's trying to have a professional career or wanting to travel, either. I've finally traveled Europe (last summer!), and am slowly finishing college and am a working writer ... but it's taken me SO much longer and cost me SO much more heartache than it has the kids who hop through college and into career and new relationships kid-free.

So yes, you can make things happen for yourself, your kids can be brilliant and you can accomplish everything you wanted ... but damn, it's SO much harder than it has to be. And I'm only able to say this now that I'm nearly 30 (you wouldn't have caught me admitting to any of this when I was 20!).

it dosnt matter wat other people think. is a 12 year old is pregnant then she is pregnant and her choiced form there are her and her families all we cna do is offer help to her. becuase she has to be scared

Quoting ~BooBooAndBaby~:“ it dosnt matter wat other people think. is a 12 year old is pregnant then she is pregnant and her choiced ... [snip!] ... pregnant and her choiced form there are her and her families all we cna do is offer help to her. becuase she has to be scared”

no one's arguing the fact that once a pregnancy happens-- what we're concerned about is when it's acceptable to start having sex.

a 15 year old (like yourself) said it was fine if a 12 year old wants to have sex.

that's what's disturbing.

do you agree?

Quoting Mara:“ no one's arguing the fact that once a pregnancy happens-- what we're concerned about is when it's acceptable ... [snip!] ... a 15 year old (like yourself) said it was fine if a 12 year old wants to have sex. that's what's disturbing. do you agree?”

I would be a hypocrite (obviously) if I said teens shouldn't have sex. But I think the fact that I wasa teen mom I can actually say with authority I never wanted the same for my lil sister or for any other teen out there. I was sooooo envious of my sisters journey through high school because she got to do all the things I didn't then dispite everything I had to watch her go through her own pregnancy experiance. Hers turned out much differently but I dont think any girl in her teens should be faced with the decision of a surprise pregnancy so young with so much unknown still in their lives
NO! Teens should not be sexually active. But thats not going to happen because being a teen means your confronted with amazing amounts of hormones, pressure etc. I was the preverbial "bad teen" my lil sister the honor roll student. It dosen't matter your being percived as a "good kid" or not the pressures are huge and as the cusp of adult hood approaches nearly impossible to avoid. I say looking back wistfully that I wish I had waited. My daughter is has changed my life dramatically. I am so much better a person for her being here I wouldn't change the way my life went for ANYTHING because it is the way it was supposed to be. But I will be honest with HER when she asks and tell her I wish I had waited. (oh and you wont see me carrying on about how I am so special cause I finished high school and college because that doesn't define being a good MOM the decisions our children make throughout their young lives do... so far so good but I've got a long way to go)
OH And NOa CHILD (which is what a 12 yr old is) should not be having or even considering sex. Seriously. Thats just perverted. I dont care what they've "been through" in life. 12,13,14 I consider them all still in the last recesses of their childhood. NO ONE at that age is ready to handle the consequences of sex including pregnancy (or lets say AIDS, HPV, Herpes, need I go on?)
I mean if your going to go THAT young where the hell do you draw the line? What about the 10 year old in Idaho that gave BIRTH in March?? She was ready? I was one of those teens who looked younger then my years (especially while I was pregnant) so I know the stares from old ladies and the comments but some of them aren't without merit they hurt yes but you can either rise above it and BE a good mom or you can be a proud defiant person who thinks they can do no wrong and live your life trying so hard to show how right you are that you perpetuate the problem rather then help others avoid it.

i agree that 12 is way to young to be haveing sex... i lost my virginity at 12 got pregnant at 13 and had my son at 14. now that i am 18 i really should have waited. but whats done is done and i stepped up to my responsibilities and dealt with my choices. i don't regret haveing my son but i do wish i would have waited.