re: why you don't want to be a statistic in wikipedia

I didn't say they all weren't true

Just throwing it out there nothing is wrong with being on welfare either way. Times are tough and people need help. Even the people who work go to school do all that stuff. You need money to live. If you need help and need welfare there is no shame in that.

She was not saying all moms she was putting statistic's up. No one is making anyone look bad. Why let it get to you if nothing that she posted apply's to you. As a teenager there's allot we go through mentally and physically. Adding a child to that does not help. Graduating, school, social life, becoming who you want to be is kind of hard being a teenager and accomplishing that you can't say it's not.

Quoting Mara:" AUTHOR'S NOTE: Because of the many responses I've received from intelligent and concerned teenage mothers, ... [snip!] ... the world a better place. Please feel free to reply with all and any thoughts you have on this posting! All the best, Mara"

I never hear any of the success stories of teen pregnancy like my sisters. All you ever see is a naysayers point of view saying you can't do it and since your still a teen your going to fail. Well instead of that why don't people educate these teen mothers send them to parenting classes let them see what it is all about. I unfortunately had to grow up to fast when my mother and father left me. I am now a teen mom or what everyone calls a statistic. Did you know we are all statistics if your over weight under weight have 2 kids and so on. They are just numbers that mean little.

this is my first pregnancy and i was only 17 when i got pregnant, i turn 18 in a couple of days. my boyfriend/babys father is 24, and honestly marriage is not on our checklist right now. part of the problem with teenage pregnancy and what goes on with teenage girls who get pregnant and keep their kids are how they are portrayed in society. if you have a baby at a young age, all odds are automatically against you. everyone thinks you need to get married and live together and all this and that, but that's not how it should be. you should get married because you love someone not because they are the father of your child, you can both be parents without being together. i'm still with the father of my daughter, but whose to say how long it's gonna last, no one knows what the future holds. another reason why teenage mothers are part of these statistics are because of their partner of their parents. which is a reason for parents to be more involved. im not saying they should provide everything for them, because life's never going to be that easy, but teens need to know that it's okay to make mistakes, i don't consider my daughter a mistake, but some people might. i made the adult decision to have sex, so i have to make the adult decision about what to do with my child. i'm so greatful to have my parents backing me up, and i feel sorry for girls who dont have their parents. being a parent is hard work, my daughter isnt here just yet, but i learn from my parents. and my parents would give their last breathe in their body to know that they've done their children right. parents like mine, sacrifice everything just for their children to have something, and thats what a real parent is. teenagers need to know that it's not cool getting pregnant at a young age, but it's not the end of your life either. people need to tell teenage girls who are pregnant all the things they can do, and not focus on the things they cant. just because you're pregnant doesn't make you disabled, it doesnt make you dumb, it doesnt make you any less of a women, it just makes you a mom and it changes your priorities. there are plenty of girls who get pregnant at a young age and finish high school and go to college and make something out of themselves. where are those statistics at? because those are the statistics im going to be in. some people just take pregnancy differently, some people like myself take it as a reason to do better for myself, because if i do become one of the statistics where my daughter becomes pregnant at a young age, i want her to know that it's the not the end of the world, just a new beginning, and i want her to know that she can do anything she wants to and having a child doesnt stop you from doing that.

Wikipedia is not a good source for information...

I think it is very ignorant to try and say that ALL teenage moms will be bad! I have a friend who became a mom at the age of 16 and she is and has been a better mom than most adult women I know!!!! I started at 18 (although still a teen I was an adult) But I know some teen moms who are amazing as well as adult women but I also know some teen moms that arent good but I know just as many adult women who shouldnt be moms!!!!! Age means nothing its how you act and what you do for your child not how old you are!

Quoting Mz Molina mother of 4:" I think it is very ignorant to try and say that ALL teenage moms will be bad! I have a friend who became ... [snip!] ... adult women who shouldnt be moms!!!!! Age means nothing its how you act and what you do for your child not how old you are!"

ideally -- age = more experience, training, perspective, self-control and if you work hard enough, plenty of money to buy a safe and peaceful home for your child.

most teenagers (and some adults) are not at all cut out for parenting in the first place: they're self-centered, impulsive, emotional, financially unprepared and need to work on getting their education to a place where they can actually be gainfully employed some day.

Quoting Mara:" ideally -- age = more experience, training, perspective, self-control and if you work hard enough, plenty ... [snip!] ... unprepared and need to work on getting their education to a place where they can actually be gainfully employed some day."

So here I go; the last part of the brain to mature, being at age 24 or later, is the frontal lobe. Up until this point, it is still considered an adolescent brain. A brain that is not yet able to fully rationalize and often acts on impulse. No matter how "mature" some girls think they may be, you really don't fully open your eyes until you've passed this stage. My question is when labeling someone a "teen mom", at what age does that stop? And if I remember being told by my English college professors, Wikipedia is not an accredited source. I think the idea of proving the statistics wrong is a great idea. The reason I think these stats are biased, is because obviously these people are uneducated and have no idea how the human brain works. Is it that at age 20, we spontaneously become responsible, rational decision making adults? I'm thinking no. Maybe if they eliminate the age factor all together and just start making the statistic on the population as a whole, teen moms wouldn't feel like the odds are against "them" as an age group and that these statistics can apply to any age. Maybe then, the statistics would turn themselves around. If you pin someone to a statistic and embed this in their minds, they actually think there is no hope and that something such as graduating high school is a "no-go" or isn't likely to happen anyways.... Why? Because the statistics on Wikipedia say so!

As for myself, I got pregnant with my daughter at the age of 17, AFTER graduating from high school a year AHEAD of my class. And definitely did not have support in the beginning. But gradually my family came around and they couldn't be more happier with the decision I made of keeping my daughter. As of currently I am 19, my daughter, Elizabeth, turned 1 this past May and is THRIVING. Her father and I bought our first house in January. He is 23. I took 2 semesters off from college taking care of my daughter and giving her the attention she needs. I gave her the best start any mom can give, she was fully breastfed and to this day is a "boobie baby". I earn A's and B's and OH, did I mention I'm going to school to be a CNM (Certified Nurse Midwife). I will be completed with my RN degree April 6th, 2014. My dream job since I was about 9 *laughs to self because this is completely true*.

I'm not sure how to end this post. I'm on such a roll with this teen pregnancy stats bull crap. I think I made a point somehow.  

Quoting LaurenElisa:" So here I go; the last part of the brain to mature, being at age 24 or later, is the frontal lobe. Up ... [snip!] ... not sure how to end this post. I'm on such a roll with this teen pregnancy stats bull crap. I think I made a point somehow.  "

the statistics aren't bullcrap -- i backed 'em up if you continue reading.

all of it's derived from actual research, census data and so on. wikipedia was just the meeting place for these statistics when you google "teen pregnancy".

teenagers aren't ready to be parents for the most part, no matter how smart and motivated they are otherwise. it's simply not the ideal time to start rearing children in the modern world, whatsoever.

and you're a clear example of someone who will defy most of the statistics surrounding their demographic (age-wise), but for the most part, you can rest assured that becoming pregnant before high school is finished greatly increases the mother's chances of never graduating, and once that fails to happen, predicts a lower income and a greater risk for a multitude of issues (from mental disorders to violent crime) that arise when families are reared in chaos and poverty.

there are probabilities and there are individuals. the probability that an individual will become a negative statistic lies solely in their choices, but most young pregnant women don't even KNOW they have choices or how to soldier through the many large hurdles pregnancy puts in their way much less do so without their child suffering to some degree as a result.

i am always pleased w/ the women who come on here and reflect on the post rather than blindly reacting -- i know those are the young women who're going to do motherhood right.

Teen moms often get defensive when the numbers that say the odds are against them and their children are thrown in our faces. Who can blame us? A good mother will do what's best for her children no matter the age, and when someone starts throwing out numbers it can be frustrating. Those statistics reflect the unfortunately overwhelming population of young mothers who are undereducated, irresponsible, and lacking in emotional/financial support. Mara's right; they are not bull crap. They're alarmingly truthful, and the only people who can change the facts are us. I know Mara's intentions were good, but I could've predicted that she would've gotten this sort of response. I understand the frustrations of the teenage mothers out there who are doing nothing but trying to make the best life possible for their child(ren), but the best way to respond to this is to do exactly what the topic says... don't be the statistic.

I was 17 when I had my first son. These numbers were thrown in my face from all angles. Even my mother's initial reaction was "well there goes your education." I made the decision to prove that it didn't have to be that way, and that's what it takes. You have to make that decision and stick with it no matter what. I graduated from high school with my class in 2006. I immediately began college, and graduated with my bachelor's in business from one of the best business schools in the US in 4 years, which I paid for myself. I worked the entire time to pay for childcare and my son's needs. Luckily, my parents were very supportive, but they encouraged me to do this on my own. After college I got a stable salary-paid job, which I have been working at for 2 years and have already been promoted once over people who had been with the company 5+ years. I am 24 years-old, married, and expecting my second child in January (7 years after the birth of my first).

I'm very supportive of the teen mothers out there... especially those who don't have anyone to tell them that they don't have to be the statistic.

There are women out there of every age that are not fit to be mothers just as there are women out there that can make it and be great parents even as young as 14.

I am 17 and 13 weeks pregnant with my first child. I have graduated from high school, completed one full year of my associates degree in biology and have been married to my 19 year old husband for 4 months. We have complete support from both our families and our friends.

Im not saying our life has been a cake walk, but nothing has been handed to us either. We have the resoureses to provide for our child and after a year or so i will be going back to school to become a pharmacist.

Any woman or couple can be great parents if they set their minds to it and want to do it. No one should give up just because youre pregnant. Your dreams dont get taken away, you just have to change them alittle or put them on hold.

The younger mothers who have read these statistics, acknowledged the reality of them, and reacted by encouraging themselves and others to defy these statistics have my utmost respect. Instead of becoming defensive, those women actually read the original post, thought about it, and gave an informed and mature response. Most replies were like that, or they detailed how the woman is currently going about defying those statistics. That is awesome.

I will forever be thankful that I wasn't a teen mom. The thought terrified me, and I took every available step to avoid it. You face a society that wants to shame and punish you, but you remain hard-working, determined, and loving mothers. Honestly, I wouldn't have been able to do that. I would have been a statistic. I did the right thing for the world by waiting until my 30s to have a child.

There are good mothers of all ages. Good moms, like good people in general, know their strengths and weaknesses. Just because I am having children now, in my 30s, doesn't mean I won't be as good of a mother as those of you who had children young. I had to wait and be naturally ready for a kid. Successful young mothers don't get to wait. You just do it. It's something I truly would not have been able to do, and it is really inspiring reading the stories and comments from those of you who have chosen to defy the statistics and prove the world wrong. Rock on.

Quoting Hepcat281:" The younger mothers who have read these statistics, acknowledged the reality of them, and reacted by ... [snip!] ... reading the stories and comments from those of you who have chosen to defy the statistics and prove the world wrong. Rock on."

Thank you for your positive post!! :-)

I want to start this off by saying that I was a teen mom. I had my first child at the age of 16. I am going to go down the list of statistics that Wikipedia gave and give my opinion. 1. I gained way to much weight with my first pregnancy, about 60 pounds. However, I know many teen mothers that are more worried about staying in their size 0 jeans then the health of their baby. 2. I honestly think that statistic is a little low! I personally had my children 18 months apart and out of all the teen moms I know out of my little town only 1 did not have a second child within 24 months. 3. I did not fall into this statistic. But I do know many girls that have. My cousin is one of them. Its like it is easier to yell and scream at the baby then actually showing it affection. 4. Academic performance- not a factor with my children. I expect nothing but 100 percent out of my children and their school work. My son is in the first grade and most of the time he gets wows on his paper work. However, most teen mothers are more into their lives then their children's work. As far as my daughter getting pregnant as a teenager, she will be on birth control! And not the pill, I was on it and I just did not take it. As far as my son going to prison, I am aware that I am raising a soon to be MAN! And my husband and I have already drilled in him respect, responsibility, and manners.
On a note I think Wikipedia missed, Many teenage moms do not graduate high school. If they do, only a few go on to college.
After saying all this I want to say. I accomplished high school. I am a certified nursing assistant,work a full time job, and attend College to become a nurse. It can be done! It takes a lot of determination and will power! It gets hard at times, I find myself studying at my daughter's ( age 4) gymnastics practice or at my son's (age 6) football practice. I do not regret my children! I live for my children. However, I wish I would have waited. I wish I would have had the house of my dreams, my degree, and a good job before I had children. Because for the first 3 years of being parents, we struggled! Even though I am not through with college, Thanks to my husband. We are in the position that I can not be worried about this unexpected pregnancy.. I am women enough to say that if it was not for my husband I nor our children would have the life that we have now. It took 4 years for him to finally land the great job he has now. But finally we are prepared financially to have a baby. I am sorry this has been so long, but I wanted you to know that you do have a teen mom supporting you! You are not saying that it can not be done or that all these things are going to occur or that you will not make it anywhere in life. IT IS GOING TO BE HARDER! And will take a lot of self control and determination. Teen mothers became a statistic when they got pregnant, But you do not have to become all of the statistics.. Thank you for caring enough about the young girls to post this. I wish there was more people out there that did that and was just plain blunt about it. Maybe there would not be as many teen pregnancies.