re: why you don't want to be a statistic in wikipedia

Thought I should add as a contracted worker for the Ministry of Children and Family Development. I unfortunately see a lot of mothers in their 20's, 30's and 40's that are following the road of these stats too. I was 17 when I had my son and believe that the struggles I faced as a teen parent made me the strong, motivated, informative woman I am today and I thank god that I was blessed with my beautiful son as early as I was to help straighten my life path out. Mothers of all ages make mistakes when raising children.... I know... cause I work with youth that have parents of every age, race, financial background etc.
Young ladies who are fighting back on this forum... people will say what they are going to say, and stats will "prove" what they are going to "prove".... just stay focused, positive and know that they only person that matters is the child you raise.

all i can say to this is that it is mostly crap, BUT because wikipedia!
that stuff is not always factual i could go in there right now and change EVERYTHING about teenage mothers and anything! go to something real with REAL facts. i am an 18 year old to be a mother and i've been NOT living with my parents since even before i was pregnant, the way the child is born is the way he/she will raise a child because granted some want better for them but they cant give it too them because they dont even know what it is.

I agree and disagree at the same time. Mothers can act the way you have described at any age. I was a week off 16 when i had my daughter. Im pretty sure everyone was waiting or me to fail. i was a troubled teenager. BUT as soon as she was on the way i completely changed. All I wanted to do was prove everyone wrong and I feel I have. As a 6 year old she is incredibly intelligent , reads and writes at an 8 year old level and even better at maths, she plays touch rugby, t-ball, takes music classes. Has never missed a day of school and is extremely social. She has lived in the same house as long as she can remember. I had no support, I was in my own at 16. I have worked the entire time since then, I don't drink at all, She does not even have a baby sitter. I went back to school when she did and studied business. I met my partner when she was 2 years old, he has been there and been a great role model since then. She has a good relationship with her father and sees him regularly. No matter what age I had her I wouldnt have done anything differently. I have done everything i possibly can to give her the best life and most opportunities out there and all I want in return is for people like you to not lump me in to the unfit mother category. It is so frustrating and I hate having to feel guilty about bringing a well rounded happy child into the world.

Quoting Sarah Ward1:" I agree and disagree at the same time. Mothers can act the way you have described at any age. I was a ... [snip!] ... category. It is so frustrating and I hate having to feel guilty about bringing a well rounded happy child into the world. "

you aren't IN the unfit category if you've managed to do it right.

YOU are the proof that teenagers can do it right.

your post made me happy!

I disagree with with everything that was said about young mothers. I was kicked out by my mother and had no where to go but thankgod the father of my child he got us a place and is supporting me and our child while I finish school. Trust me going to school while your pregnant isn't easy but at least I am going to graduate on time and not be called a bad mother by ignorant people who watch 16 and pregnant and think all young mothers neglect their children. Just because were young mothers doesn't make us bad parents. Reading stuff like this really upsets me because me and my boyfriend are working hard to be the best parents we can be and people put us down and say we're bad parents because were young. Stuff like this should have never even been posted all it is Doing is putting down young mothers and telling them they can't do it just because there young. People should be encouraging us and telling us that we can succeed, no one cares about what systics have to say about us.

Teen pregnancies are very steriotypical. Many people think young people are 'irresponsible' and that they 'sleep around' and thats how they end up pregnant. Some young mothers do plan a child because they think it will 'make' a relationship and dont realise how hard it is until the baby is born. This topic is huge as people want best for the baby (of course, as no child should be brought up without clean clothes, food, and decent loving caring parents/parent). However, many teen parents may not have thought about financial support with the child, and most do young mothers end up broke from the farther and left with the child and struggle as bringing up a child is hard, and even harder without the support. The child ends up then without clean clothes ect, as the mother is unable to cope. There are many places now for teen mums to get support though and some teen mothers turn out to be better than mothers in their 20s/30s.
If a teenager is pregnant, it is suddenly assumed that the mother is going to be unable to cope, probably isnt going to do anything with her life and will live off the dole. In many cases this has happened although some teenage parents DO think about what they are gooing to do with their lives and how they will support the child. It is also assumed that the mother was intoxicated/ doesnt know who the father of her child is, truth be told, some cases are of failed contraception but the majority is no contraception or planned pregnancies. However, I believe it is wrong to judge these teenagers as irresponsible as many adults who are also not ready for children fail to protect themselves.
Teenagers get looked down on for being pregnant alot of the time, however I believe they would also get looked down on if they had an abortion so there is not much choice for them. As for the support of the baby, many teenage dads do try to support their child and if they dont, the teen mum knows who the father is and I actually believe they know more often then not.
I am currently 16 and 26 weeks pregnant with my first baby. I have full support off my family who are a big help to me and I have been with my boyfriend for a year and 8 months to date. I believe he will support me as much as he can. Our baby boy was an accident but I would not change it for the world personally. We have been told on numerous occasions that we wil be good parents to the child and we are living with my parents until we are on our feet. My partner is currently working at a factory earning £250 minimum per week and is two years older than myself. I am currently in my last year of school and will be sitting my GCSEs and AS level English exam soon and I am predicted good grades. Following this, I will be taking a year out of education but do plan to go back into education in September 2013. I personally believe, for my age, I am doing good for myself and this baby... Also, I believe that most teen mothers around my age mark are going to somewhat same route as me and want whats best for their baby and theirselves...
Nowadays, I think teenn mothers are not as bad as they are made out to be as many of them turn out better parents than woman of a more mature/suitable age for pregnancy.
At the end of the day, teenagers are only concidered 'too young' for pregnancy by society and are steriotyped this way as if teenagers were not ment to be pregnant, we wouldnt be, but nature has not stopped it.

http://a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/546170_283148285097164_100002059858190_658049_1421914004_n.jpg

No matter what the teens on here are going to disagree, but as a young mom I had to notice that it's not only me who I have to take care of. Right off the back of telling my parents that I was pregnant at 16... I was kicked out Luckily I was the oldest of three and was use to taking care of my siblings. I knew what I had to do. My Education was put behind me and a full time job was in store for me. I lived with my boyfriend until I saved up enough money to get a place of my own.(which was very difficult at 16). I had a 2 bedroom apartment and was very prepared for him. I saved up my extra money and eventually got my own car. With no help from anyone. But when you said... The truth is, giving birth and being a mother can be incredibly difficult-- and especially if you are lacking money and/or emotional support. Your children will not grow up with all the opportunities and love that you could give them if you waited to have that second child until you were more financially and emotionally stable. It is true there are not many young parents who have support nor the funds to have a child, And in fact there children are often being taken care of by there parents which may I say is NOT YOUR PARENTS RESPONSIBILITY. But they feel obligated to do it. For some reason after I found out I was pregnant 5-6 girls became pregnant. I think 2 of these girls actually take care of there children. Which I see major issues coming in the future of the child if there parents are taking care of there children. But over all what I am saying is IT is Not easy and you can miss out on allot. So safe sex is the best sex if your having sex and if you'r not having sex wait until your emotionally stable for the mental physical and sexual responsibility's that can and will happen because of intercourse.

i think that some of these statistics apply to more than teenagers. i'm 18 and 27 weeks pregnant.. only a couple of my friends have been supportive and i have had alot of trouble with my family too, but already i am ready for my daughter to come into the world. any parent could have problems like this whether they are a teenager or not. i fully accept that the minority of teenagers that do fall pregnant and aren't very good parents may taint the views of many people as you never hear about the good teenage parents. i also think that the way a parent bring up their child has something to do with it. for example a mother, no matter what age, that doesnt cuddle or show affection to her child is bound to have a child that doesnt know how to show or be affectionate. it is all about the way a child is brought up.

I don't care what you THINK the facts are not only am I a teen mom and a great one, but I know plenty of teen moms that are better moms than some of the people I have seen that are 30 and 40. Not only that but ya they may not be prepared but neither are most women who are having babies no matter what age they are. I don't think you should be talking for teenage mothers or any mothers at that, you know nothing. I don't know where you get your so called facts, but you should really get them from a better source. Maybe you should actually go talk to some teenage mothers.

Quoting Anastacia Vandiver:" I don't care what you THINK the facts are not only am I a teen mom and a great one, but I know plenty ... [snip!] ... called facts, but you should really get them from a better source. Maybe you should actually go talk to some teenage mothers."

i have talked to a LOT of teen moms.

and i still stand by all the statistics here -- which if you kept reading, were backed up by additional sources.

adolescence is not the ideal time to become a parent, all we can hope is that there's enough support and love in you and your child's life.

most were supported by Wikipedia which has been proved to be wrong on many accounts. It is not a reliable source of information and neither are you.

Quoting Anastacia Vandiver:" most were supported by Wikipedia which has been proved to be wrong on many accounts. It is not a reliable source of information and neither are you."

further ... a few pages in, but i don't expect you to read through all of this, i have backed up my wikipedia sources w/ census / hospital data.

Actually you shouldn't assume things it makes an ass out of you and me. You shouldn't of used Wikipedia at all it can be changed by anyone. Nothing on there is reliable and you need to back facts up with more facts. Backing up Wikipedia proves absolutely nothing to anyone. And I'm not disagreeing with everything but honestly I'm not agreeing with all of it either. This site should be to help moms of all sorts. And this forum doesn't do that, it's not helping anyone because you're talking to women who most likely are already pregnant or have already had kids.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Anastacia Vandiver:</b>" Actually you shouldn't assume things it makes an ass out of you and me. You shouldn't of used Wikipedia ... [snip!] ... do that, it's not helping anyone because you're talking to women who most likely are already pregnant or have already had kids."</blockquote>




There is a teen pregnancy and teen parenting forum. This site does support teens. Just because you don't want to believe these statistics doesn't mean they aren't true.