Biting

So I thought I'd take a minute to introduce myself and ask all of you fine ladies a question.  My name is Laura, and my little boy is Vince.  Vince just celebrated his first birthday on the 9th.  He's working on walking, though he doesn't seem terribly motivated.  He'll take three or four steps, and that's it.  My biggest problem with him though is that he tries to bite me when I make him mad, and I'm not sure how to make him stop.  I've tried putting him down if I'm holding him, telling him no, firmly, and sitting him down and walking away.  I'm not sure what is the best way to deal with it, but it's driving me crazy.  I can barely even cook dinner because he'll pull up on me, and bite the back of my thigh.  Ouch!  So any tips would be greatly appreciated.  And I'll toss in a couple pics of my little guy just for good measure.

Cutie! I'd say continuing with firmly telling him no, putting him down and not giving him the attention he's looking for is the way to go. It won't be overnight but he'll figure it out soon enough. Some parents are all for the "bite him back" method but that doesn't sit well with me although I wouldn't judge anybody else it's worked for.

I hate to say it but bite him back, he will see that he doesn't like it much either. I am going thru the same thing with my daughter she is about to turn 2. She goes to bite me now and I tell her that if she does I will bite her back and she stops in her tracks. That is just a suggestion though and it is working for me...good luck!!

Well I never really had that problem with my son but my friend would bite her son back....don't get me wrong...not hard at all....just so he knows that it hurts......

Quoting Vincent&Me (Laura):“ So I thought I'd take a minute to introduce myself and ask all of you fine ladies a question. My name ... [snip!] ... Ouch! So any tips would be greatly appreciated. And I'll toss in a couple pics of my little guy just for good measure. ”

No no no, get out of here, get out get out get out!!! Come back to PWI, no toddlers, noooooooooooo!!!

 

As for the biting, Lucas bites me too whether he's angry or happy it doesn't matter, he just chomps down on my knee/shoulder/toe/etc. Sooooo I'd like to see suggestions too!

Quoting ♥ Mama Jo ♥:“ No no no, get out of here, get out get out get out!!! Come back to PWI, no toddlers, noooooooooooo!!! ... [snip!] ... he's angry or happy it doesn't matter, he just chomps down on my knee/shoulder/toe/etc. Sooooo I'd like to see suggestions too!”

I was just about to post a link to this in the A/S thread.  lol.  I figure the moms in here probably have more suggestions on this subject than moms with four month olds.  lol

Quoting Vincent&Me (Laura):“ I was just about to post a link to this in the A/S thread. lol. I figure the moms in here probably have more suggestions on this subject than moms with four month olds. lol”

Oh I know, I was just messing with ya!  

It's wierd to see posts from people I know in PWT!!!

I guess while we're on the matter, how and when did you guys start disciplining?  Is he too young to really understand a timeout, or something of that sort?  I do tell him no, and if he's getting into something he shouldn't I remove him from the situation, but I'm at a total loss where to take it from here.

Quoting ♥ Mama Jo ♥:“ Oh I know, I was just messing with ya!   It's wierd to see posts from people I know in PWT!!!”

Oh, you'll be here soon enough.   

I agree with the bite back idea. Averi has just started to nip at our knees and sholders sometimes. My MIL said to really nip that in the butt right away. Make a big "owwie that hurts" out of it and fake cry to show that its not ok. I've been doing that and she hasnt bite me again.  

MamaJO: We'll all be here REAL soon.....bwahahhahahahaaaaaaaaaa. Some of us will go kicking and screaming. lol.

Well i'm not there yet... but i was reading babycenter and found this.



Without a doubt, biting is the behavior that parents dread most. Throwing things and even kicking may be more dangerous, but biting has the unique distinction of bruising feelings as well as flesh, terrorizing its small victims and enraging its larger ones. Not surprisingly, biters are often excluded from daycare or playgroups, and their parents are made to feel like pariahs.

It's understandable to despair when your toddler sinks her teeth into your — or even worse, another person's — flesh, and the "bite her back" argument may seem like a logical way to stop her biting. Nevertheless, it's wrongheaded.

Teeth (and "claws") are natural weapons for all young mammals, so your child's first instinct is to use them when she feels threatened or needs something. She doesn't truly understand that biting (and pinching and pulling hair) is forbidden, let alone "wrong." So when she bites, even if she does it gently and playfully, immediately and clearly convey to her that biting isn't acceptable.

If her "kisses" turn into aggressive nibbles, for instance, remove her from your lap with a firm "no biting." She's still too young for lengthy explanations about why biting is bad; it's enough at this point to simply tell her that she must not bite under any circumstances.

Make sure, too, that you don't inadvertently reward your toddler for biting. Of course, teeth marks will get your attention, but don't pick her up — even if it's to reprimand her. If your child bites another child, focus your attention on the injured party rather than on the biter — who may take even negative attention as reinforcement for doing it again.

While you need to firmly tell your child that biting isn't okay, actually punishing her for the behavior isn't very effective at getting her to stop. In fact, punitive measures may put an angry or overstimulated child right over the top. And though parents are often counseled to bite their child back "to show her how it feels," this is as pointless as it is painful.

A child this age isn't capable of truly putting herself in another's shoes, so she can't yet see the connection between what she does and what's done to her. What's more, young children do most of their social learning by following their parents' example, so biting your child or otherwise inflicting pain on her sets an appallingly bad example. After all, how will she learn that biting is beyond the pale if you do it, too?

Biting must be stopped, of course, but you won't stop it by stooping to your child's level. Aggressive acts stop when adults stop them. So instantly remove your child's teeth from her victim's flesh, show concern for the child who's been hurt, acknowledge both parties' feelings, and, as your child's verbal skills grow, help her learn to negotiate with words rather than aggression: "We don't bite (or hit or grab). Can you use your words to tell me what you need?"

Kaidyn bites too, but he does it all cute like. He comes up to you like he is going to give you a kiss and instead he chomps down on you. I just tell him no biting and make him get down. I don't think they are old enough to start any more of a real time out type punishment. I just don't think they would grasp that at all yet.

Quoting Kaidyn's Mommy:“ Kaidyn bites too, but he does it all cute like. He comes up to you like he is going to give you a kiss ... [snip!] ... they are old enough to start any more of a real time out type punishment. I just don't think they would grasp that at all yet.”

That's what I'm thinking.  I'm just not sure when to start doing that kind of stuff.  Vince bites playfully sometimes, but it's really bad when he gets mad.  Watch out!  I don't let him bite me, but if I'm telling him not to do something, he'll try to bite my hand or arm.  Or if we're changing him, and he doesn't want changed.

Quoting EastonsMom:“ Well i'm not there yet... but i was reading babycenter and found this. Without a doubt, biting ... [snip!] ... negotiate with words rather than aggression: "We don't bite (or hit or grab). Can you use your words to tell me what you need?"”

Thanks for that info.  Luckily he's never really bitten anyone except us. . . yet.

Quoting Vincent&Me (Laura):“ Thanks for that info. Luckily he's never really bitten anyone except us. . . yet.”

my son was a biter b4 he could talk and tell me what he wanted or why he was angry. everything you are doing sounds rite. i dont believe in biting back aproach that wouldnt work for me. if you ignore him when he bites and doesnt get a responce from you he will stop if he thinks its getting a responce weather its positive or negative he will continue to do it. i looked all over online when my son was biting b/c i was so upset with his behavior. but after talking to the pedi and dealing with it. he grew out of it. alot of the behavior problems are age related and he will out grow the biting...just keep doing what your doing b/c it will work!!