Forums > Teen ParentingPage 1 2 3 .. 20by: Caitlin[SERGURY DUST]

Adoption or Keep?

posted 12th Aug
Okay. Here's the problem. If you read my profile it says that the baby daddy doesn't want to be in the baby's life. Well now he's saying that ifI keep the baby then he doesn't want me to do it on my own. But he didn't want the baby last week!&& he was likeI don't believe in abortion. I said I also don't believe in abortion. && he said.So adoption is the only option we have.&&I said thatI don't believe in adoption cuzI don't want my baby bouncing from home to home.Cuz the family can put on a happy face while they are trying to adopt the baby. But once they get a hold of the baby. It's over. You have no control of what they do with your baby. && personally I wouldn't be able to sleep at night. && he was like wellI don't want that kid.&& you aren't gunna get an abortion.&&I don't want you to do this on your own. [Again he didn't want the baby last week.]I really don't want this to get back to Maly[BM#1].I was like [very sarcastically]so you want me to give my baby up for adoption because you don't want this to get back to her? NO. Not happening. Then he was like you know you can't afford it.I can't afford it!I already can't afford Donte[Kid#1].&&I was like ok. So what do you want me to do?&& he was like it's the most responsible thing to do for the "BABY" if we give the baby up for adoption!&& so what I'm wondering is if it's the right thing to do? or no? and why! Lady'splease help!Don't be shy to be blunt with me! I can take it!

Thanks

-Caitlin
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I'm TTC since November '08, have 1 child & live in Jamaica
posted 12th Aug
. keep the baby.....I only saw the sentence "I wouldn't be able to sleep at night" and if there's ANY regret you would feel.. dont' do it.. because once it's over.. it is over... and you can't do anything about it
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I have 1 child & live in ?
posted 12th Aug
If YOU want to keep the baby, then keep the baby. If he doesn't stick around because of that fact, then he's a shmuk.
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I'm TTC since January '09, have 1 child & live in Pennsylvania
posted 12th Aug
Wow! Well sweety, this is something you're gonna have to decide on your own.  You cannot be selfish, you cannot let him control your decisions, and you need to think only of this baby.  None of us here can make this decision for you - and shouldn't influence you in any way.  This is your decision.  Do you have family you can talk to?  Family that can help you?  A counselor that can help you?
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I have 3 kids & live in California
posted 12th Aug
Quoting I*love*my*Haley*Bug:“ not even reading.. keep the baby.....”

o i forgot to say. this baby was wanted! planned! and he knew exactly what he was stepping into when he said yes! which boggles my mind!
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I'm TTC since November '08, have 1 child & live in Jamaica
posted 12th Aug
I gave my baby up for adoption. If you have any questions about it, please ask.
For my situation it was in Ella's best interest. I lived in an abusive home and moved out at 18. I pat my rent/car/school everything by myself and I literally barely have money to eat, so there was no way I could afford a child. She is with an amazing family, not bouncing around. I chose the family and after I had her they took her home 2 days later. It is an open adoption, so i receive updates and get to see her.
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I have 1 child & live in Toronto, Ontario
posted 12th Aug
Do what you feel is the right thing. And most families wanting to adopt aren't going to put their time and money into something they are just going to give up later on.
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I'm due February 26th (a girl), have 2 kids & live in Naha, Japan
posted 12th Aug
I'm not even going to read this.

If you want to lay down and have sex then you should take responsibility and keep your child and give him or her a wonderful life any way you can.
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I have 1 child & live in New York
posted 12th Aug
Quoting Mommy [Caitlin]:“ Okay. Here's the problem. If you read my profile it says that the baby daddy doesn't want to be in the ... [snip!] ... the right thing to do? or no? and why! Lady'splease help!Don't be shy to be blunt with me! I can take it! Thanks -Caitlin”

Tell him to go F@#k himself. If he doesnt want the baby, you can do it alone. He cant make you give it up at all. Have him sign away parental rights if you think that would be best. Dont put his name on the birth certificate. Remember, it is up to you, your body, your child, your decision. Good Luck sweetie, i am so sorry he is such an ass.
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I'm due February 4th (a boy), have 1 child & 4 angel babies & live in Saint Louis, Missouri
posted 12th Aug
It is up to YOU and you only,not him! he sounds like a jack ass.

You can do it,my sister has just turned 16 and is now over due by one day,I belive she can do,and I belive you can do it.
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I have 1 child & live in Yemen
posted 12th Aug
Quoting Mommy [Caitlin]:“ Okay. Here's the problem. If you read my profile it says that the baby daddy doesn't want to be in the ... [snip!] ... the right thing to do? or no? and why! Lady'splease help!Don't be shy to be blunt with me! I can take it! Thanks -Caitlin”


Honey, I would kick him to the curb and take care of the baby. You need to do what you feel is right for you and the baby. He has a right but not to force you into anything.
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I have 1 child & live in Ohio
posted 12th Aug
Brain hemorrhage.

&& it kills me to read that = P

But I don't know how to answer your question, you have to do what you think is best. But there are a lot of people who would be great parents, and just can't have babies.
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I have 1 child & live in Ontario
posted 12th Aug
You have to do what is right in your heart. Not what he persuades/tells you to do. Follow your heart. You've already stated, abortion is not something you would consider and you don't feel adoption is the right answer for you so what other options do you have, keep the baby. Do you have family that will help you out? No one can really ever "afford" a baby, some are more financially stable and prepared but these things happen. You aren't due til Feb you have time to buy things between now and than and you can get nice used stuff at resale stores/garage sales.
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I have 3 kids & live in Wisconsin
posted 12th Aug
You have to decide what is best for YOU
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I have 2 kids & live in Gilbert, Arizona
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