re: funny/shocking/frustrating pregnancy stories

ok so here is one that i thought was cute
the other day we went to our regular check up and at the end the dr said ok lets listen to the heartbeat so she grabs the machine and rubs the gunk on my belly. As soon as she set it down she yanked it back up and looked at my belly really weird..... then she did it again....... same reaction... so she did it again..... this time she yanked it back up and went damnit! (really funny to me) i was like uhhhhhh what, she said it wont let me listen to the hearbeat.... ok so im a little slow i was like what the machine?? she said no the baby everytime i put the machine to your belly the baby kicks it! lmao im only 15 weeks i didnt know that the baby could do that already! i just thought it was super cute  

I work as a nurse. One night whenI was 8 1/2 months pregnant an elder gentleman passed away. I was the charge nurse that night so I had to deal with the family. I refused to pay $90 for one maturnity uniform so I thought I could get away with just wearing a larger uniform. I didn't gain any weight anywhere except my belly, so the top fit fine over my stomach but the pants would keep falling down. So here I was talking and consoling the family and my pants kept falling down and I was constantly pulling them up. The family was great and pretending they didn't notice but I felt horrible and unprofessional. That morning before I went home I went to wal-mart and bought a black maternity shirt and pants and wore a lab coat overtop.
Another time at work, it was the night shift and I was doing rounds checking on patients when I dropped my pen on the floor. No one was around to help me get it so I tired to bend over and get it, which I'm sure looked funny. In the end I was on all fours, in the middle of the hallway picking it up.
You could tell which female doctor have never been pregnant. I was 39 weeks pregnant and went for my prenatal checkup. I was laying on the exam table and when she was done she told me I could get up but wouldn't help me and left the room. I was looking around for something to hold onto and there was nothing and I could not rollover as the table was very narrow and high off the floor. She came back into the room and looked surprised I was still lying there and repeated "your done. you can get up now." I just gave her a look like are you for real. My husband who had to leave the room earlier came back in and helped me get up.

I am 13 weeks pregnant and i have already had so many stories to tell! but i'll go ahead and tell the one that happened last night (There might be a LITTLE bit to much information...sorry! it was funny..)

I should start off by telling you that i have had the most RIDICULOUS sex cravings ever! I just have to have it at least once a day. well yesterday it didn't happen because i had to work late and didn't end up getting home until after midnight. well, we we're both SO tired that we went straight to bed- he had to be up at six to work anyway. well, as I'm off in dreamland I'm dreaming about having sex with him and just like that i was WIDE awake! haha I just started kissing my poor comatose husband out of nowhere because i just HAD to have it! right now! He politely kissed me back...not really awake. And i just got more and more into it trying to turn him on, alas he gives me one last kiss and collapses on his back (poor guy was sooooooo tired, it was 2:30 in the morning) so i just rolled over onto my side and started crying! he heard me and pulled me close to him and started giving me a back massage to help me feel tired. That just made me cry harder! so here i was lying in bed bawling my eyes out and my poor exhausted husband is trying to comfort me and go back to sleep at the same time. So then i just got really bratty and scooted all the way to the edge of the bed so he couldn't touch me, i couldn't believe i'd gone from sad to angry so quickly! after a few minutes he started kissing me aaaand...the rest is history ;)

Lets just say, he never lets me go to sleep anymore without my daily dose of sex. lol

Quoting ErickaJones:“ I am 13 weeks pregnant and i have already had so many stories to tell! but i'll go ahead and tell the ... [snip!] ... me aaaand...the rest is history ;) Lets just say, he never lets me go to sleep anymore without my daily dose of sex. lol”

That's too funny!!! That's how I was my last pregnancy....do me do me do me!!! NOW!!!!
You should come over to my house.....you can help my SO out  . For some reason I have an extreme aversion to meat this pregnancy....and I'm not just talking lunch meat LOL. MySO doesn't know what to do with himself (well he does....but that's not what her prefers  . )I'm just NEVER in the mood.....I feel so bad for him....

I've had diarrhea throughout my pregnancy, sometimes several times a day. A few times it has been difficult to control. I won't go into detail.

Quoting monroe8562:“ i have another one! lol this just started happening like 2 days ago. whenever i sit down to watch tv, ... [snip!] ... of baby's kicks. then baby kicks the remote clear off my stomach! its happened 2 days in a row and i get a kick out of it. lol”

oh my gosh, that happens to me alllll the time.. goofy baby. =D

Quoting Dancing Queen:“ I've had diarrhea throughout my pregnancy, sometimes several times a day. A few times it has been difficult to control. I won't go into detail.”

But it's not a funny or shocking or frusturating story if you're not telling!

Quoting raen1009:“ This isn't really a funny event that happened... more like a daily thing.... Anyways, now that I'm in ... [snip!] ... read the cartoons you have up so far.. Maybe you could put a "new" icon next to the new ones so we know which to look at?  ”

That's so funny. However, I was walking out of a Kangaroo store (much like 7-eleven) and I saw this huge pregnant woman walking in. She had on an old ratty ripped up sports bra and daisy duke shorts that were unbuttoned and unzipped. If you think you look trashy you should have seen this woman. Like straight out da traila park (I used to live in one so its okay for me to say it).
You are not alone. Iwear the same exact thing you do except I bought pj bottoms from the men's department in Target since theywere cheap. I also wear a wife beater and my husbands t-shirts. I am only 29 weeks and cannot fit into anything. I am not looking forward to the next 10 weeks.

Quoting Logan's_Mommy:“ So I KNOW you wont use this but... I HAVE to tell someone and If I told some one I knew my husband would ... [snip!] ... histaractly.... OH MAN... it wasnt a good day for us that night. Needless to say- We didnt have sex for a couple of days.”

lol...oh my god this just made me hit the floor!

Quoting Dancing Queen:“ I've had diarrhea throughout my pregnancy, sometimes several times a day. A few times it has been difficult to control. I won't go into detail.”

i hope its not a medical concern like crones or colitis....

Last night I was lounging in bed watching some McGyver reruns on my laptop, my SO hops into bed and so I roll over to spoon him but as soon as I do I feel my stomach start to gurgle... I haven't pooped for days and I can feel a stinky fart building up, figuring I'm under the blankets and the smell will dissipate before he notices I let the fart slip quietly and seriously no more than one second later he starts screaming loudly (enough for my housemates to hear) "Oh my God! Did you just fart? That's awful!!! WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN EATING!?!" He gets out of bed and runs to the bathroom pulls back the covers and sprays his deodorant all through the sheets.

I lay there exposed in my panties, blushing & shrugging helplessly. Secretly I was laughing evilly inside my head - serves him right after years of poisoning me with his!

Heresls one ladies:
after a i had my first baby like a few months later....
Me and my b/f were feeling a little sexual one night..ahaha
Keep in mind that I am breatfeeding this time around too So my boobs are full of milk!...lol
But anways... My b/f loves to suck on my breast right, He does that for a few min and out of no where he gets squirt in the eye with milk!!!! i was laughing sooo hard!

Okay, I've got a cute story. The other day I was watching A Baby Story on TLC while my boyfriend slept. (He works 3rd shift so he sleeps during the day). I was watching the birth of a baby and the moment that the baby cried my boyfriend sat up and looked in the direction of the baby bed that we had set up. He looked for the baby and then looked at me, because I was laughing, and then he laid back down and sighed. It was so sweet, I told him that Elias wasn't here yet so he could relax and he went right back to sleep ^-^ He's going to be a good daddy ^-^

These are some great stories that certainly help on those tough days. Right now I'm 28 weeks prego with #2. My son is 6 six years old and he's beyond excited to get a baby sister.So, he loves rubbing and kissing my belly and saying hi to his sister all the time, so, he gets that she's in there somewhere.
However, we were sitting in bed the other night watching some TV before it was bedtime and a "diet pill"commercial comes on TV. He focuses in on it and once it was over he turns to me and says, "Mommy, you need to get some of those to deal with the extra weight and squishness you've been going through." My husband almost had a hernia and was doing his best to not laugh out loud.I guess my sondoesn't understand that mommy has to put on some weight in order to have a healthy baby. So. of course, my dear husband decided to tell our son that it would onlyget worse before it gets better. I could have killed him.   It's only been 23 pounds, but, I'm a petite woman so it looks like a lot.

Quoting KD [4wks to go!!!]:“ Okay, I've got a cute story. The other day I was watching A Baby Story on TLC while my boyfriend slept. ... [snip!] ... I told him that Elias wasn't here yet so he could relax and he went right back to sleep ^-^ He's going to be a good daddy ^-^”

Awwh that is just too cute!