re: Adoption (Sensitive Subject)

your child doesnt know he was adopted?

Quoting Expecting a Daddy's Girl:“ Yea, but I don't talk to her. She is not a people person.”

when he is alot older tell him the truth...Im sure he wont ask anytime soon...as far as he knows your a friend. Plus its cool you get to be around him alot  He will know you cared becasue of that.

Quoting Ms.Melody!BOOBS!:“ your child doesnt know he was adopted?”

No, he's three yrs old.

Quoting Ms.Melody!BOOBS!:“ your child doesnt know he was adopted?”

I dont think a 3 year old could understand that

my son is 4... and since he was born he knew he 'grew in my tummy' and that im still in his life.. hes always been told that so its just always how he remembers it so it isnt a big shock later on

Quoting Expecting a Daddy's Girl:“ No, he's three yrs old.”

when he is older he will be ready i know it really confused my nephew when he was told that steph carried him but then went to live with jeff and crissy please wait its caused more probs then anything

Quoting Ms.Melody!BOOBS!:“ my son is 4... and since he was born he knew he 'grew in my tummy' and that im still in his life.. hes always been told that so its just always how he remembers it so it isnt a big shock later on”

I think that's the best way! If it's something they've always heard, even before they can understand, it's not like you have to have a big drawn out explanation later on, where the kid is completely shocked and trying to digest it all.

I too think that he'll understand later in life that you did it as a selfless act. There may be a time (perhaps when he's having a bad day with his adopted family) that he'll have some issues with you "giving him up". But if you're always there as his friend, he'll be able to talk to you about it.

btw, I also "gave up" my children. When their father and I split he begged to be given the chance to have primary custody (he'd been a long-distance truck driver for 12 years). Because I was doing a lot of travel (for work) and becausedespite being a crappy husband he was a good "daddy", I agreed, with stipulations that I could see them as much as I wanted, etc. Unfortunately that job didn't work out -- and there are times I regret that I don't have them around me full time (I have them 2 to 3 days a week). When I became pregnant (this pregnancy "wasn't supposed to happen"), my one son (11) said that it was "no fair that this baby will get to live with you full time". Although that somewhat broke my heart, I explained to him some of the reasons why and he understands -- just wishes it were different.