sperm donor (baby's daddy)

at the time that i found out that i was pregnant i was a little hesitant to let the dad know. i knew that since our encounter was a one time thing he wouldn't believe me. after i broke the news to him i didn't hear from him for 2 months. when i did hear from him he asked me some questions that broke me down. obviously there has been talk about me. i denied all the allegations that his friends had made and now he wants to be a part of what's going on. i am mainly letting him contact me because i don't want to seem pushy. at the beginning i told him that he didn't have to be there if he didn't want to. it's all going to be his choice. i won't take away his role of a parent as long as he wants to be there. should i handle this situation differently? is anyone else going through this?

i am in a way kind of going through the same thing.. but i told him that i will never force him to be in our daughters life, although i'd love for her to know who her father is.. he is excited now but still has his doubts even though i am 100% sure he is the father.

it only takes to have sex once to get pregnant! some men don't understand that, or they are afraid of the responsiblity of a child. if he wants to be around, let him.. you shouldn't deny your child of her father or him of his child. Good luck hun!

I think you're being mature about it, since he acted that way in the beginning but you still are letting him in on everything.... it's hard because i had to do the same thing

idk about what advice to give you but i hope everything works out well for you and your baby!!

im not going thru it but i think your being mature about it. if he wants to be there, then let him... but don't let him push you around to do so!.. you said it yourself if he doesn't want to be , don't make him be.. but make sure he realizes that if hes going to be a part of the baby's life, he needs to be respectful to you.. good luck momma!

Well I can't say that my situation (although I wouldn't really call it that) is quite the same. Long story short, me and the BF met at a bar in December. I got pregnant in Jan. we were on dating, but we decided to make it a relationship before I found out that I was preggo. Now at first we weren't going to keep it, of course I changed my mind. I said the same thing you did, I am not forcing you to be there its your decision, and he chose to be with me. We live together and we are working our relationship and planning on getting married someday. As for you dude, first of all please don't take this the wrong way, but in the future the one nighters, dude wrap it up. I can vouch that pulling out doesn't work, because my son is in my stomach. If he wants to be there let him, and make sure he supports his child or pays child support. But I wouldn't have a relationship with him, just becuase you are pregnant. Its great though if he wants to be apart of your babies life. I hope everything goes well for you!

My situation is similar in some respects. I assumed at first that the baby's father would not want to know child, but he's since said that he wants to be a part of the baby's life. My opinion has always been that if he wants to be around, he has to show that with his actions. Hehas to be proactive. In other words, I'm not going to call and e-mail him asking if he wants to visit or if he wants to have information about how the pregnancy is going, he's got to the be one to contact me. So far he has lived up to his word, but his word really means shit to me because he's proven that lying comes extremely easy to him.

If he continues to be proactive once the baby is born then I'm happy to let him take an active role in the baby's life. If he stops trying, then he's out. I don't want my child to remember meeting their father but then have the father decide that he's not interested in being a dad anymore.