My husband is driving me nuts with his parenting skills!

I know instead of complaining, I should be grateful he's around and takes an active interest in our 6 month old. He's really very attentive and he'd do anything for us.

Since day 1, he had never really been around babies before, and never knew how to act, so he followed my cues. And at first, it was so great to see him getting involved... but then, it really started to grate on my nerves.

If I made up a silly song about my girl and her mommy, next thing you know, HE'S singing the SAME SONG, but making it about HIM. Then if I make up a silly little game, he plays it with her, too! Everything I do, he copies it. If my girl'ss having a fussy fit, I'll let him get as much experience as he can by dealing with it, and I'll step in only if I have to - but when it does escalate to the point where I need to step in, and it almost always does, and I try to quiet her down by softly singing to her, he joins in! I'll change the song, he follows suit.

It's really irritating me! I just want to have some things that are exclusively for me and my daughter, and I want HIM to have his own little father/daughter stuff, but EVERYTHING I do, he picks up on it and joins in! I actually had to ask him to leave us alone at one point so I could have some alone time with her!

And maybe this is too much, but at this point in her life, she's pretty much in a routine - and if she cries, he needs to always ask me what to do. "Is she hungry?" "Should we put her to bed now?" "Do we wake her up to feed her?" I wonder if other dads are like this, and maybe I'm too picky? I just can't believe that he needs to ask me about every little thing. What on earth would he do if I went on a mini-vacation, like a day-spa trip? I can't even imagine!

It's really taking a toll on me. Does anyone have any suggestions on what I can do? Am I overreacting? How do I tell my hubby he's driving me crazy?!!

ohh.. i think its sweet, but then again my baby isnt here yet so I dont know exactly how you feel. How is ur personal relationship with your hubbyholding up outside of baby???

I can understand it driving you a little nuts, but you just need a bretaher....
he's doing these things b/c he sees them working and see's how gtreat of a job you're doing. he probably doesn't feel confident enough to try his own things... he's still learning  
Maybe you can help hmi make up a daddy song .... and if you do take a mini vaca- it'll trun out fine.. he'll figure something out   just don't bring your cell ;)
Try not to let it get to you and see it as more of a compliment. As she gets older and he gets more experience they'll start doing they're own thing... and you'll find yourslef a little jealous once ina while too *wink*

OH YOUR HUBBY SOUNDS LIKE MINE he already starts in with crap i have a lil song i sing to my son in my tummy he started singing it and i went ape shit on him i told him it was being of hormaons but damn do your own thing

Maybe he needs some time with her where you're not around. A spa-trip or a mini vacation. It makes him soley responsible for her entertainment and care. If you're constantly hovering around and "know" what to do for her, it won't give him the opportunity to be self-sufficient. Keep your special songs and games for your alone time with her if it bothers you so much that he "copies" you. If you make him feel like you HAVE to be around to make sure he's taking care of her properly, he'll never have the confidence to go it alone and you're kind of reinforcing that by not taking time for yourself and in turn, giving them special daddy/baby girl time.

Maybe you should go on a mini vacation and leave him with your daughter all day. Then he'd have to come up with his own calming techniques, etc. It sounds like he is trying really hard, and though I can see it being really annoying it would be hard to bring it up without possibly hurting his feelings. Good luck!

It sounds to me like he genuinely just isnt sure what to do. Since he trusts you'll know what to do as the mom, he is copying you because he feels that is what is right. I would talk to him about it. There are tons of cute little books you can buy that have little activities you can do with babies. I bought my husband one for fathers day. Maybe that will help him figure out some things he can do on his own without having to resort to just doing everything you do.

And, in my opinion, you should try harder not to let some of the things bother you....I know that might be hard, but it does seem like he is trying to make a genuine interest in his child....he just doesn't seem to know how. Just keep letting him try to calm her down on his own. Say something like "you know what to do, just try some different things that you've done before." I don't know, I know it's a tough situation cause it is driving you crazy, but he does seem like he wants to get involved....which is a lot more than some people get   Good luck!!

Quoting BritniLynn:“ It sounds to me like he genuinely just isnt sure what to do. Since he trusts you'll know what to do as ... [snip!] ... is driving you crazy, but he does seem like he wants to get involved....which is a lot more than some people get   Good luck!!”

agreed!

sorry, but I think you're overreacting.
I understand wanting mommy/daughter rituals that are just yours, but he's just not sure what to do so he is doing what he sees working.
Tell him that you want to have special mommy/daughter time and you want to give him daddy/daughter time.
But, to be so worked up about it is a bit of an overreacting thing.

Quoting cat_1978: she's pretty much in a routine - and if she cries, he needs to always ask me what to do. "Is she hungry?" "Should we put her to bed now?" "Do we wake her up to feed her?" What on earth would he do if I went on a mini-vacation, like a day-spa trip?

My husband is theexact same way on this part!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ugh it's so frustrating. It's like, you see me doing it all the time. Are you just not paying attention to me or do you just want to be annoying?

Aww What's a guy to do. It seems to me no matter what someone is on here going on about what there DH is doing...

My husband sings with me and gets the words wrong... Sure it annoys me sometimes, but I love it... Even if he's singing the same things, dosent mean she wont remember you singing it, it's different when Mommy and Daddy do things even if they try to do them the same

I recommend the Baby book, they have a chapter just for things Daddy can do with the baby and suggestions.

I think your husband must be a wonderful guy for trying so hard.
Just let him be by himself with the baby so he can figure things out for himself. But I still think it's amazing that he is so willing to follow your lead.

Thanks for your replies, everyone!

I know I'm super lucky to have such a wicked awesome husband who's crazy in love with our daughter, and I know I'm overreacting - I can chalk it up to hormones still, can't I? lol I like the idea of buying him a book - I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I do want to have some sacred rituals for me and my girl. We'll get through this! lolThanks everyone!