Quoting SINGLE MOM AGAIN:“ Then maybe he really aint ready and she doesnt sound stable at all.Tell ur man to go file 4 temporary ... [snip!] ... custody until she gets court ordered help.This will only make it worse for her.You guys are probably doin the rught thing then.”

I agree! Go file for custody.

My husbands mind was made up way before we got the news that her dad was going to pass away. He said that he doesnt want his son having to go through that. He would rather him remember his papa when he was alive. He said that he doesnt want justin to be tramautized (sp?)

My grandpa passed away when i was 3 and i went to the funeral but didnt get to go up to the casket, im glad that my parents did that because i like to remember my grandpa the way he was when he was alive rather then when he passed away. The same when they were trying to revive my dad, i still have nightmares because of what i saw. Now that i think about it i would of rather of waited until then were done and then seen him.

Im standing behind my husband when he says that he's not going to the funeral. I know he might get mad at us later because of it but we are trying to look outfor his best intrests, the last thing i want is him having nightmares because he might not be ready to cope with life and death.

i think letting him go isnt necessarily a bad thing but if shes that fucked up then ur husband needs to accompany the boy and bring him right back home after...

Quoting Faithie's Mama Jeanne:“ i think letting him go isnt necessarily a bad thing but if shes that fucked up then ur husband needs to accompany the boy and bring him right back home after...”

Thats a great idea. If they can get along to do that.

Quoting Faithie's Mama Jeanne:“ i think letting him go isnt necessarily a bad thing but if shes that fucked up then ur husband needs to accompany the boy and bring him right back home after...”

That's the problem, he's probably let him go to the funeral but he cant leave me because of how dizzy i get and how often i can pass out. My mom cant stay here with me because she needs 40+ hours at work and when she gets off she comes home and goes straight to sleep. ( if he were able to go i dont think he'd allow justin to go to the open casket, i guess it would just all depend)

And about the custody thing, he's going to be a legal resident here after november 6th i think and then we're going to court to fight for custody. They wont let us start fighting for custody until he's lived her for 6 months.

I was 6 years old when my great grandma died. She was practically my best friend at the time. We were flying back from Ohio and she was trying to hold on for us but she didn't make it in time :[[[ I wish they would have let me go to the funeral and say goodbye. I had dreams about her ghost coming to say goodbye to me. It can be painful even for a little kid to not be able to say goodbye.

I would say to let him go. I was 3 years old when I went to my grandma's funeral. That is the only memory I have of her, laying in her casket. Its not a bad memory or anything, my cousin and I were running around the her casket playing tag! Everyone tells my cousin and I how funny it was that we were runing around. I cant tell you what I thought at the time, but i am definitely glad that I was allowed to go and see her one last time.

I would definaly allow my child to go and that would be what is best IMO. Yeah you want them to remember what they were like alive but eventually they will realize they are gone and they never got to say goodbye. If I was in your situation I would take him myself (with you included) but not allow her to do it.

Personally, the situation with her would be over immediatly and she would NOT be picking that child up again for ANY reason. Its a immediate danger to the child and child services can stop ALL custody with her until it goes to court (even if a custody oder is already in effect)for the safety of the child. The boy would be in therapy to get him out of that way of thinking sooner rather then later because later will make it much harder if not impossible.

Quoting Beth [due 12-25-08]:“ I was 6 years old when my great grandma died. She was practically my best friend at the time. We were ... [snip!] ... had dreams about her ghost coming to say goodbye to me. It can be painful even for a little kid to not be able to say goodbye.”

right b4 my mom died i told her i was having dreams of my dad and grandma sayin things 2 me.she told me that when ppl die thats one way the communicate with us.my mom now talks 2 me almost every night in my dreams and sometimes jus holds me in her arms.im a firm believer in all of this now.i think either way he will be ok.since his mom has issues so severe i think he should stay with u guys.his papa will say good-bye to him and stay in his dreams.who knows maybe him sayin he out huntin is cause that was papas fav thing 2 do and thats wat papa told him.papa could have already told him b4 u guys just in a better way his own way.jus keep letting him know that papa might not be able 2 be seen but hes always watchin over him.its very comforting for my 5 year old.he always talks about it about both my parents.good luck 2 u.