Custody question....

So I'm leaving my husband... I'm currently pregnant with our second child and we have a 4 year old.... I'm moving back home to WI with both of our kids, and he's staying in NOLA since he is in the Navy and stationed here... I know he is going to want to see the girls and I don't have a problem with that, but I do have a problem with him having them for long periods of time... It's not like he can just take them for the week end... he would have to have them for longer than 3 days... I'm worried that he's just going to pawn them off on his mom, or get a live in GF again and have her take care of them... I don't want that... Also.. he would more than likely take them to his mothers house... I love his mom, but she doesn't exactly rank high on her mothering skills to me.... I don't want the girls to have soda... something is always readily available at his mothers house and she has been known to give it to a 9 month old in a bottle before... Her house isn't clean, there is dog shit everywhere.... Her house really isn't sanitary to live in... Could I get CPS in this matter over her house and having the girls there or do I not have much of a choice? I'm just worried that they aren't going to be taken care of the way I want them to be.... Does anyone have any advice? Am I just being paranoid about this? Thanks

You can get cps in and investiagate it.. animal shit is unhealthy to anyhuman alone babies.. just dont tell them your calling let it be a surprise so she doesn't have time to clean up..  

you figure all that out when you go to the mediator and set up the parenting plan.. Since your the one moving, you will most likely be the one paying for the traveling expenses. just fyi.

Quoting ♥B♥:“ So I'm leaving my husband... I'm currently pregnant with our second child and we have a 4 year old.... ... [snip!] ... to be taken care of the way I want them to be.... Does anyone have any advice? Am I just being paranoid about this? Thanks”

My ex is in the Marines but is currently still in the same town as me for the next year. However, when he returns to CA to re-join the fleet no judge here will allow him to have them over a certain amount of time because of their ages. I live in a mother's rights state ans they believe that even a week away from the mom at 7 & 4 is too long. Especially for someone who is in the military who may or may not have reliable child care set up. Define your visitation now in black and white, you have the option of stating where the children are allowed, who's cars they can be in etc. Do it all up front so that there is no "gray" area to be taken advantage of in the future. If you need anything or have any questions, PM me. Divorce is hard but, it was the best decision I ever made for myself and my kids.

Quoting Waiting for Rylan:“ you figure all that out when you go to the mediator and set up the parenting plan.. Since your the one moving, you will most likely be the one paying for the traveling expenses. just fyi.”

Not if I file in WI... that's the problem we had before, if I file in WI he has to come up and go to all those classes...

Good luck. You are making a tough decision, and if its the right one for you, more power to you. I do not know the laws in the states you are in, but most judges will take the "mother's side" over the father's, unless there is a huge issue at hand (ie, mom's a druggie or something). You may find more helpful advice, especially more specific to your state at http://www.divorcenet.com/ (which also has a forum similar to BG you can join: http://www1.divorcenet.com/bbs/ubbthreads.php).

Quoting SMFantastic:“ Good luck. You are making a tough decision, and if its the right one for you, more power to you. I do ... [snip!] ... http://www.divorcenet.com/ (which also has a forum similar to BG you can join: http://www1.divorcenet.com/bbs/ubbthreads.php).”

THank you so much... I'm sure this info will be helpful... I feel that I'm making the right choice... I left once and came back and it's just not working out... But thank you again  

Quoting ♥B♥:“ THank you so much... I'm sure this info will be helpful... I feel that I'm making the right choice... I left once and came back and it's just not working out... But thank you again  ”

Well, when it's over, its over. Obviously this seems to be for the better. I hope that site can give you some of the answers you are looking for, but at the same time, make sure to take it as any internet source (with a grain of salt) because all of the info may not be current or correct. You could also try to look up the family courts for whatever state you are looking to do this through, because that will have the most up to date information for the area.   Again, good luck!!

you can call cps dfs im sure they would do something if your going to try to get custody the decison is up to you wheither you want him to see the girls or not its your choice.... =D