How to tell your toddler.

Hi Ladies well Im 10 weeks and i have a 4 year old daughter. I've decided to wait to tell her about the baby until im out of the first trimester because a year ago I miscarried So im still a little nervous. Im just wondering how I should tell her. I thought about taking her to my next Drs appt (which is July 17th) So she could hear the heartbeat, but Im not sure if thats the best way to break it to her or if I should just sit her down and tell her. Any Ideas?

I think you should sit her down and talk to her, ask her if she would like to go with you to hear its heart.

Quoting LAURA[its a boy]:“ I think you should sit her down and talk to her, ask her if she would like to go with you to hear its heart.”

Yeah I think thats a good idea. Thanks!

Quoting LAURA[its a boy]:“ I think you should sit her down and talk to her, ask her if she would like to go with you to hear its heart.”

I agree. She might not like the idea of not knowing anything until you get to the doctor.

I had the same problem with my son butI just broke the news to him .... & he was actually very happy . I have taken to every drs apt ( but one ) including the ultrasound which he loved . I even had him help me pick out a baby names .. Good Luck

Quoting 2nd baby on the way!!:“ Yeah I think thats a good idea. Thanks!”

Maybe you can also buy her some books that show the fetus' development so she can have a better understanding of whats going on.

I think that's a good idea - sit her down to tell her and that ask her if she wants to hear the baby's heart. And obviously, once the time comes, include her in the planning/shopping stuff. My sister is 8 years younger than me so when my mom was pregnant, my parents asked me if I wanted a brother or sister (I said, "ew, I don't want a brother, but a sister would be nice" and my parents kindly obliged  ). Then, my parents included me in choosing the name, decorating the baby's room, etc. I don't think I was ever jealous of my sister. I did dislike her intensely when she got to be a teenager and was getting away with stuff that I had never gotten away with, but that's a whole other story. lol

Quoting LAURA[its a boy]:“ Maybe you can also buy her some books that show the fetus' development so she can have a better understanding of whats going on.”

Yeah I do plan to do that. I think she will be very happy and I definately want to keep her involved!

I told Aydin right away; he was two at the time. I also purchased some "Im a big brother books"

Just dont wait to long otherwise she might resent the fact of a new baby coming.

i think you should talk to her about having a new additoin to the family and let her go with you. Also let her be involed with helping you get ready for the baby. Mine was 3 and my husband and I asked her if she was eady to be a big sis, she was so excited! We let her go to the dr with me and i let her get the baby's clothes ready, and she would rub my belly every nite with lotion.

I just told them. My oldest was still too young to really understand when his sister was born. I just told him that was going to have a baby and he was going to be a big brother. I took him to Dr appointments and my hubby held him up so he could see the moniter when they did ultrasounds. We told him that it was his baby brother or sister (before we knew it was a girl). Once we found out she was a girl, we called her by her nickname, Baby Rae. With this baby, we did the smae thing with both. Matthew was older and understood a little more than the first time, and Marissa wasnt quite sure what was going on. But, we took them to most dr visits and let them see the moniter when they did ultrasounds. When we found out it was a boy, we referred to him by his name, Miles. They both adjusted very well to the new addition. No jealousy, no regression.

I always recommend that parents get the older kid(s) involved as much as possible. I understand you wanting to wait until you are out of the danger zone. To a kid, it wont matter how long you wait. I would take your daughter with you so she can see the baby on the ultrasound. That would make the connection more real, IMO. If you think there will be questiong about where babies come from, go to the bookstore and buy you were born it is a reading rainbow book. It is EXCELLENT for giving just the right amount of info about where babies come from without giving the full sex talk. http://www.amazon.com/How-Were-Born-Joanna-Cole/dp/068812061X/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1214503730&sr=8-1
There's the link for it on Amazon.com.

Quoting red_dragon_girl_69:“ I just told them. My oldest was still too young to really understand when his sister was born. I just ... [snip!] ... There's the link for it on Amazon.com.”

Thanks everyone for your help.
Im so excited to tell her. I think she will take it very well. Shes my little independent girl. I've wanted to tell her already but wanted to make sure i didnt miscarry again.

Quoting 2nd baby on the way!!:“ Thanks everyone for your help. Im so excited to tell her. I think she will take it very well. Shes ... [snip!] ... it very well. Shes my little independent girl. I've wanted to tell her already but wanted to make sure i didnt miscarry again.”

I understand the hesitation. I wouldnt want to get a child excited about a new baby and have to tell them later (GOD FORBID) that the baby didnt make it. At 4 yrs old, she is just too young to understand a miscarriage. It is best to wait until that chance decreases. Good luck with telling her, not that you need luck in this.

Quoting red_dragon_girl_69:“ I understand the hesitation. I wouldnt want to get a child excited about a new baby and have to tell ... [snip!] ... a miscarriage. It is best to wait until that chance decreases. Good luck with telling her, not that you need luck in this.”

Thank you so much!