I just need advice, not judgement.

The past 3 weeks, my mind has been totally scattered..doing 180's multiple times a day. Do I want to keep this baby? Or do I not? & Thinking of all possible outcomes.

Well, my SO broke things off with me last night after giving me the silent treatment during both of our birthday weeks last week. He's not even going to give it a try- the question of him and I is out of the picture. I am devastated, but I know I deserve it. (backstory-http://forum.baby-gaga.com/about2461012.html) What I didn't deserve, was for him to tell EVERYONE the details. So here I am, absolutely humiliated and depressed..people have it in their heads (including his parents..who I thought adored me) that I have gotten pregnant on purpose to 'trap' him into being a father figured for my DD... and I'm just thinking that I don't want to be a single mom to TWO kids with two different fathers. I want having a baby to be a happy thing, not this.

Emotionally, I just can't go through another pregnancy alone so I made my appointment today but I can't help constantly thinking that I may regret it. My mind is made up one day, and the next its opposite. Is this a normal way of thinking before having an abortion? Everyone isn't always 100% on their decision right? Can anyone link me to a website or something that might help me feel more comfortable about my decision?

Do what you think is best. But I personally wouldn't do anything I wasn't one hundred percent sure about. just make sure u way your options.I was going to have one with DS and I made the appointment and while there walked out. I did that twice before realizing it wasn't for me.

Quoting supa~~fly:" Why not consider adoption?"

I wouldn't follow through with it. It's not an option.

That is such a difficult situation I'm sorry you have to deal with that. He is a piece of smurf for leaving you because of this and you deserve better. I know not everyone is 100% but I think the more you're unsure, the more you will regret it.
Best thing to do I would say is to weigh the pro's and con's... think about your future, your daughter's future and what would be best for both of you. Think about the reasons you are considering it.. is it more for you, for others, for what others would think etc...
I would probably abort if I was you.. I couldn't be a single parent to one, let alone two children. Also the two different fathers neither of which I am with would be a big part in my decision..but I'm not you. I can't decide for you. I feel bad for even telling you what I would do because I don't want to sway you. It needs to be a decision that you, and you alone make.

Also, don't let him bully you into thinking that abortion is your only option and be ready for him maybe not wanting to parent if you do decide to not have one.

If your heart isn't 110% set, you may do something you regret. Coming from experience.
I was sixteen when I had an abortion. No, neither my SO at the time or I were ready for kids. I thought I was just doing it to make him stay (which I ended up leaving him five months after because I couldn't stand the sight of him) and he also threatened me over the subject numerous times. In all reality, YES, it was the best decision for me but even almost six years later, I still have my regrets about it.

If you're not sure id say no, that is one thing you do not want to regret.

Do you think you can raise both kids without him? Is that something you want to do?

How do you think you would feel after the abortion was finished?

I found these amazing videos on Youtube the other day that takes you through each type of abortion- medical, surgical awake and surgical asleep. They take place at a clinic somewhere in the UK, but I thought they were really good at "normalizing" the procedures and exactly what all will go on. Of course it will vary from clinic to clinic but for the most part I think they hit all the major points of whatever procedure you choose.

The videos are NOT graphic at all and do not show the actual medical procedure:

Surgical abortion awake-

Surgical abortion asleep-

Abortion pill-


Good luck!

<blockquote><b>Quoting malibu.:</b>" The past 3 weeks, my mind has been totally scattered..doing 180's multiple times a day. Do I want to ... [snip!] ... their decision right? Can anyone link me to a website or something that might help me feel more comfortable about my decision?"</blockquote>



I had my second abortion for the same reason. I didn't want two kids from two different dads, not be with either of them and be a single mom, again! Being a single mom of one was hard enough. I thought I may regret my decision, but I did it anyway and im very glad I did! I waited until I was with my husband to have another child and things couldn't have worked out more perfectly! He even adopted my oldest daughter.  

After reading both posts, I get the feeling that you should reconsider.

1. He sounds like a total smurf. It may suck right now but you definitely deserve better.

2. Nobody can tell you what to do. It's entirely your choice and your decision to make.

If you're not at least 100% sure with your decision, don't do it. You will regret it, i know this is a very hard decision to make, but you have a few more weeks to make it right?

I've been there but I didn't have 2 different fathers, just one. I had a newborn and was pregnant again not even later. We fought a lot and he told me to abort the new pregnancy. He was very adamant about me not keeping the new one. I had a 7 month old and I was 7 months pregnant he punched me in the stomach to 'kill' the baby and walked out on us leaving us with nothing. I did what was best and left that state and went where my family was and got the help I needed. I got on my feet. Raising 2 kids by yourself is hard but everyone can do it help or no help. My friend is a single parent to 3 kids while her ex husband is locked up for trying to kill her and her unborn baby. If you're having so much unsureness about it, maybe deep down inside don't want an abortion. Maybe you do it's hard to know for sure. But you also need to think ahead in life and figure out how much it might effect you then.