Does your SO parent more than you do?

With this shift in my class schedule, my husband is now their primary caretaker. He spends more time with them than I do. He's the one who usually makes dinner, helps them with homework, does their baths, plays with them.

I drop them off and pick them up from school/daycare/sitter. The only weeknights I see my kids for longer than an hour are Wednesday and Friday. And then I still do a bulk of the housework so I catch up with schoolwork or housework on the weekends which doesn't leave much quality time unless I let things go (and I do).

It bothered me when that realization hit but I was wondering if I was alone in this.

if your hubby is the primary care giver wtf isnt he doing the majority of the housework?

Quoting I love Kenzi:" if your hubby is the primary care giver wtf isnt he doing the majority of the housework?"

Because I have kid-free hours.

Plus, he works full time and does most of the childcare so I don't mind doing the housework. It isn't much since our kids have their own chores.

Nope, I do.
But I don't see an issue with it being the other way around! I think its great that he's taking that on while you further your education.

Quoting SAFFY™:" Because I have kid-free hours. Plus, he works full time and does most of the childcare so I don't mind doing the housework. It isn't much since our kids have their own chores."

oh ok he works too i was going to say

yes he does, but he is a SAHD

Quoting I love Kenzi:" oh ok he works too i was going to say"

Yeah.  

He tends to shy away from housework because when he does it, I get so annoyed and just redo everything he just did. I'm particular about my house and where things go.

Quoting Blythe.:" yes he does, but he is a SAHD"

It's just...on a site full of SAHMs, I'm starting to feel in the minority.

I was a SAHM for 6.5 years so it's an adjustment and I don't really know of anyone IRL whose spouse or SO does even a quarter of the childcare.

Nope lol, smurf he's only made like, 4 or 5 bottles since our youngest was born, and that was 3mo ago lol it's more of a "I don't trust you to make it" type a thing, I feel like I'm the only one who knows what I'm doing when it comes to messing with water/formula.

Quoting SAFFY™:" Yeah.   He tends to shy away from housework because when he does it, I get so annoyed and just redo everything he just did. I'm particular about my house and where things go."

That's me.  

Quoting bia.:" That's me.  "

He's always "I JUST PUT THAT THERE" and I'm all "No. You put it there WRONG"

Cleaning is also therapeutic for me. I enjoy doing it.

Quoting SAFFY™:" It's just...on a site full of SAHMs, I'm starting to feel in the minority. I was a SAHM for 6.5 years ... [snip!] ... 6.5 years so it's an adjustment and I don't really know of anyone IRL whose spouse or SO does even a quarter of the childcare."

It works for us. Yes I would love to be the one at home all the time with her but I work for my Dad's business and one day hope to make it mine. The thing I do hate about it is that she wants him for everything, anytime she is hurt or scared she goes to daddy.

Quoting Blythe.:" It works for us. Yes I would love to be the one at home all the time with her but I work for my Dad's ... [snip!] ... it mine. The thing I do hate about it is that she wants him for everything, anytime she is hurt or scared she goes to daddy."

That would bother me too.

My kids have grown up with me so they go to whoever is available but their desire for daddy to do it is going up. I'm starting to feel useless.  

He kinda did, when I was working.
He works from home so DD just stayed home with him.
He didn't do anything else though, usually.
I would come home after being on my feet for 8-12 hours and see DD for an hour maybe before bedtime. And as soon as she would go to bed I would start cleaning. Even though DH is done working everyday at 4pm  

Quoting SAFFY™:" That would bother me too. My kids have grown up with me so they go to whoever is available but their desire for daddy to do it is going up. I'm starting to feel useless.  "

  Can you do something special with them like Saturday morning breakfasts out with just mom? Those things make me feel less useless.