Getting pregnant again

So we are talking about trying to start a family this summer.i had a surgical procedure done in the beg of November for several reasons. I had a lap band put in a few years ago and I was not eating it through my hormones off really bad. We also were in bad place financially and we were not ready. Also at my follow up they had told me everything they took out was smaller than it should have been for 5 weeks so I might have miscarried anyways.. I regret what happened all the time but know that I have to move forward. I have since had my band loosened and am eating. My dr put me on short term anti depressants but I'm getting ready to go off of them in 3 weeks. I have all been to a therapist. My fiancé has also stopped drinking so much and going out so much. What I am wondering is, is it. Selfish to want to try so soon or should we wait?

You should talk to ur doc and see what he thinks sounds like you have been threw a lot. I mc in nov 2012 and im ready to try again. Ur mind and body and heart has to be ready....good luck

I personally could not see myself being ready to have a child after having not been ready only a few months ago. I would suggest you ask yourself why not wait? If you can't find a reason not to then perhaps it would be best to wait awhile just to make sure everything is stable. The part about your fiance not drinking as much would be cause for my concern.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Amelia Margaret:</b>" I personally could not see myself being ready to have a child after having not been ready only a few ... [snip!] ... awhile just to make sure everything is stable. The part about your fiance not drinking as much would be cause for my concern."</blockquote>

I Completely agree iwth this.

Also dontgo off antidepressants until you are completely sure that you are fine and you cope with out them. It would be selfish to have another baby to replace what you lost. I understand wanting to fill that void with another baby.

Grieving the loss of a pregnancy, be it through termination or miscarriage, is an incredibly complex process. You just had your procedure a few months ago-I'd give your fiancé some time to establish his sobriety before adding the stress of another family member. Give yourself time to adjust to your nutritional changes, and ensure that your financial changes are adequate to support a new baby.

That way, when you eventually become pregnant again, you can celebrate your new baby as opposed to replacing a loss. I know it's hard to see, but that's what getting pregnant now would be doing

Thanks for all the opinions. I know we can't replace what has been lost. I do grieve and have grieved for the baby. I'm still not sure what to do yet but we ha had some serious talks so we will see