For those with joint custody...

So I'm pretty sure my kid's dad and I are through. We're planning on splitting up in July when the lease is up. I'm curious about joint custody, because he wants to have the kids 50 % of the time. Which is great for them, being with him. Since they're so young though, I'm concerned. He wants to do one week on, one week off. From what I've read this isn't good for kids as young as ours (3.5 and 6 months).

Do you have joint custody? What's your arrangement? Do your kids deal well? I'm sort of swimming in new territory here, and coming up with a schedule is so confusing to me. Post and run, as I'm going to sleep... but wanted to get some input.

here is what my ex and I agreed on and since we werent legally married we didnt have to file anything. It works out perfect for us.
Every weekend he is with my ex -with the exception of holidays
Holidays are alternated yearly. Example: Thanksgiving- me Christmas eve-me Christmas day-him. Then it switches the next year. The rest (Halloween, New Years, Easter, etc. we alternate but we also discuss it before hand)
He gets him for 2 weeks in June, July and August. We adjust the child support accordingly in the summer time since he haves him more. We pretty much agree on everything and it makes life so much easier. Just talk it out and do not make a final decision until you reach and agreement.. GL, I hope that helps

During school he has dd Wednesdays and every other weekend. He picks her up Friday from school and drops her back off Monday. Holidays are alternated by odd/ even years. During the summer he has her Wednesday through Monday every other week. When she was your children's age we did Wednesday at 10 am to Saturday at 2:00 pm every week. Hope this helps  

I drop V off at his dad's house every Monday and pick him back up on Thursday. We alternate Sunday nights. (We've never gone to court over it... This is what we agreed on when we split.) It was hard on him at first, but Viggo has adapted really well to the schedule and it's worked out well for both his dad and myself. However... Now that I'm looking to move out and looking into different school districts, I'm realizing that splitting custody 50/50 has it's definite downfalls. While it works out when they're toddlers, I'm realizing that if we're going to continue splitting custody 50\50, once Viggo starts school we're going to have to live in fairly close proximity until he graduates. Just something for you to think about...

When my ex and I split up we were doing 1 week and 1 week. In one way it was actually better for the kids cause they got to spend equal amounts of time with each of us...however, I quickly found out that the ex's house was the 'fun house'. No rules, no discipline, late nights, he would fail to give them their meds etc. So this cause my LOs to come back to me at the end of his week sick. I would spend all week getting them healthy again and then the cycle would start over. Kids are very resilient, and yours are pretty young so they should adjust fairly easily. The only thing I could see as being a problem is their routines, if they have one. If your ex isn't good with following routine, and most men aren't, then their schedules/routines may get messed up when they are with him, then you will have to work hard at getting them back to routine when you get them back. I would suggest that if they do have a routine or schedule that you write it down for him. And try to make sure that the rules are basically the same in each household. Discuss it with your ex. If you give your 3.5 year old a time out for a certain behaviour and he doesn't at his house for the same behaviour it sends mixed messages and can confuse your LO.

We live close to my husbands ex wife. We have the boys thursday-sunday night. We alternate most holidays and split the day on thanksgiving and christmas.