Hello everyone my name is Stacy! I just joined the site looking for some advise about a situation my hubby and I are dealing with.

My stepson is 6 and just started kindergarten this past August and has now missed 16 days of school, been tardy to class 10 times and has been removed from class early 9 times. My husband and I now have 2 choices we either report this to child services or file for him to be moved in with us and into our school district.
We are both beside ourselves as to how this could have happened, but his mother has never been one to share any information regarding anything. Even when he was a baby. If this were you what would you do? Report it or file?

He could be ill a lot. I have friends whose kids have missed more days than that from kindergarten... If the school is concerned about it, they would be the ones to do it.

I'd file way before I ever called CPS. Can you set up a meeting with his teacher?

That's the problem no doctors notes.
The teacher added them together and he has missed almost 30 of the first 100 days of school in total?
How has your friends child missed more school than this?

My kids have been very ill this year. It has been a terrible year. The tardyness I would be concerned about. Matter of fact, I think one of my twins is on about day 12 of missed days at this point. They are in preschool so it isn't the end of the world but, it still sucks. It has just been a terrible year in the area we live for illness. I am also the mom who doesn't bring their child to school until they have been 24hrs without a fever. I play by the rules.

I would try to find out what is going on from the mom and the school before I started reporting anything. Maybe he's been sick?

<blockquote><b>Quoting 624582:</b>" I'd file way before I ever called CPS. Can you set up a meeting with his teacher?"</blockquote>




That is where we received all of this information. I am not sure of the school is filing anything as they are not allowed to say for their own protection

oh sweet Jesus, I'm so glad my daughter's school isn't like that, she's missed way more than that. Between doctor trips and being sick and too many other kids being sick to risk exposure, she's missed a lot.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Not tellin:</b>" My kids have been very ill this year. It has been a terrible year. The tardyness I would be concerned ... [snip!] ... I am also the mom who doesn't bring their child to school until they have been 24hrs without a fever. I play by the rules."</blockquote>




There is no proof of illness and we have him every weekend plus every Wednesday for a few hours. I have only seen him sick once this school year.
I have found out that after 10 excused or not the school steps in.

I am not sure about where you are but here if the child is late 4 times it counts as an absence, then if they are absent a certain number of days (not too sure about how many though) the school reports it to the truancy court and the parents are fined unless they have medical reasons then of course a doctor has to sign some papers. I would talk to the school first and see if they are getting any kind of information regarding this just in case he is having problems, although I would think if he were sick you would know right?

<blockquote><b>Quoting mommymassey:</b>" I am not sure about where you are but here if the child is late 4 times it counts as an absence, then ... [snip!] ... of information regarding this just in case he is having problems, although I would think if he were sick you would know right? "</blockquote>




Exactly my point, we have never been informed that he has a cold or anything. And she has never been awesome about sharing a lot of things but illness she ALWAYS tells us because my husband has severe asthma.

Quoting Stacy101:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Not tellin:</b>" My kids have been very ill this year. It has ... [snip!] ... few hours. I have only seen him sick once this school year. I have found out that after 10 excused or not the school steps in."

Then I am not really sure. I don't have step children or anything like that so I don't really have the best advice for this. Only you really know the mothers "history" and I guess your decision should really reflect the type of mother she is.

Quoting Stacy101:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Not tellin:</b>" My kids have been very ill this year. It has ... [snip!] ... few hours. I have only seen him sick once this school year. I have found out that after 10 excused or not the school steps in."

sorry i didnt see that you contacted the school already. Have you talked to the mother, maybe that should be the next avenue. But between the two choices above, I would say report it first then if there is no resolution move to the next step

<blockquote><b>Quoting mommymassey:</b>" sorry i didnt see that you contacted the school already. Have you talked to the mother, maybe that should ... [snip!] ... avenue. But between the two choices above, I would say report it first then if there is no resolution move to the next step"</blockquote>




We were called in because mother refuses to address the topic at all. And discussion with her never go well. So that is not an avenue we can go down unfortunately.

Have you asked your step son why he has missed so much school? I mean, I would just try to sit down with the mother and figure out what has been going on. If she isn't willing to have a sit down then I'd look into other options...