re: If you found gay porn...

Are you more concerned with the fact that he/she is looking at gay porn and could possibly be gay, or the fact that they're interested in sex in general..? I think a "safe sex" talk would be good, maybe try just being up front and say, "You know.. I know it's awkward to talk about sex, being your mom and all, but I just want you to know that it's normal for people your age to start taking an interest in it, and I want you to know that I'd rather you come to me and ask me anything than finding out the hard way." And with the gay thing.. maybe just, I dunno.. insinuate that you're okay with it somehow.. then maybe, if they are gay, they'll realize you're not going to freak out and eventually tell you when they're comfortable.

i wouldnt say a damn things, knowing that my kids KNOW i would not care what their sexual preference was regardless, and let them come out when theyre ready *if* they were gay

<blockquote><b>Quoting LayLu:</b>" Are you more concerned with the fact that he/she is looking at gay porn and could possibly be gay, or ... [snip!] ... then maybe, if they are gay, they'll realize you're not going to freak out and eventually tell you when they're comfortable."</blockquote>



Sounds great thats how I would sound too and will keep on going and bring the gay part in a right way.

Quoting I Stab People:" i wouldnt say a damn things, knowing that my kids KNOW i would not care what their sexual preference was regardless, and let them come out when theyre ready *if* they were gay"

This is how I feel too. And just so everyone knows, this is not a situation I'm in right now. I'm watching a show that made me think of it.

<blockquote><b>Quoting I Stab People:</b>" i wouldnt say a damn things, knowing that my kids KNOW i would not care what their sexual preference was regardless, and let them come out when theyre ready *if* they were gay"</blockquote>




Okay what about the porn wouldnt you have the safe sex talk? By pretending you didnt know about it and something happends you would wish you did had that convo with him.

Quoting ~GAGA DRAMA~:" <blockquote><b>Quoting LayLu:</b>" Are you more concerned with the fact that he/she ... [snip!] ... Sounds great thats how I would sound too and will keep on going and bring the gay part in a right way."

I've had plenty of gay friends and I know if the parents pushed the subject, they'd keep to themselves a lot more. If they were open and honest with them and the child was comfortable talking to them, they brought it up when they were ready.
They may not be gay at all, just curious. Either way.. they have to bring it up on their own time, you can't push it. But a safe sex talk is always good!

<blockquote><b>Quoting LayLu:</b>" I've had plenty of gay friends and I know if the parents pushed the subject, they'd keep to themselves ... [snip!] ... just curious. Either way.. they have to bring it up on their own time, you can't push it. But a safe sex talk is always good!"</blockquote>




I guess it depends how close you are with your kids and how comfortable they feel talking to you.

Quoting ~GAGA DRAMA~:" <blockquote><b>Quoting I Stab People:</b>" i wouldnt say a damn things, knowing that ... [snip!] ... the safe sex talk. By pretending you didnt know about it and something happends you would eish you did had that convo with him."

Why does porn= having sex? I watched porn because I wasn't having sex. And you can have a safe sex talk without mentioning the porn.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Forrest Bondurant &hearts:</b>" Why does porn= having sex? I watched porn because I wasn't having sex. And you can have a safe sex talk without mentioning the porn."</blockquote>



Everyone is different just because you didnt had sex and looked at porn doesnt mean he isnt. Yes you can talk about safe sex talk even if you dont find porn but that would be a good time to refresh the convo.

Quoting Forrest Bondurant &hearts:" Why does porn= having sex? I watched porn because I wasn't having sex. And you can have a safe sex talk without mentioning the porn."

Yeah, they could just be curious.. they might just want to know what exactly happens because they're too scared to do it themselves, ya know? I know when I was 15 I was still a virgin and none of my friends were and I was TERRIFIED of having sex, but I still looked at porn.
And yeah, I wouldn't even bring the porn subject up because that's awkward for the parent and the kid ("Hey, I saw that porn you were watching the other day.."), I'd just have a safe sex talk.

<blockquote><b>Quoting LayLu:</b>" Yeah, they could just be curious.. they might just want to know what exactly happens because they're ... [snip!] ... awkward for the parent and the kid ("Hey, I saw that porn you were watching the other day.."), I'd just have a safe sex talk."</blockquote>


Of course you are not going to bring it up like that. You just have to know how to talk with you kids about these things. Not to push them away or judge them.

Quoting ~GAGA DRAMA~:" <blockquote><b>Quoting LayLu:</b>" Yeah, they could just be curious.. they might just ... [snip!] ... bring it up like that. You just have to know how to talk with you kids about these things. Not to push them away or judge them."

Exactly, I've been through more than enough smurf in my life lol I have no room to judge my kid.

<blockquote><b>Quoting LayLu:</b>" Exactly, I've been through more than enough smurf in my life lol I have no room to judge my kid."</blockquote>




Our love for our children is unconditional. I dont see how anyone would just their kids for whatever reason.

Quoting Forrest Bondurant &hearts:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" Hm. What do you mean outing? Like... your ... [snip!] ... they turn out to be nothing. Yaknow?  "</blockquote> It might not matter to YOU but it might matter to your child."

I understand that. That's why it would be important for me to not push the issue and force them to come out. But IMO it's no different than finding the porn yourself.

(S)he probably didn't want me to find it, either, and wouldn't be too pleased if I came right up to them and said, "ARE YOU GAY?!"

So, I don't think my spouse would do that, either. But IMO communicating about our children is important.

<blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" I understand that. That's why it would be important for me to not push the issue and force them to ... [snip!] ... "ARE YOU GAY?!" So, I don't think my spouse would do that, either. But IMO communicating about our children is important."</blockquote>




Again that would be moronic to come at your teen that way: are you gay? Come on now what kind of talk is that? Lol