I'm sorry you're feeling this way. But I wouldn't not try to make friends with people. Even if you can't go out and "party" what about hanging at your place with LO or at their place? Going to the mall, park etc.? I can imagine it's very lonely. I don't know what I would do without my friends... Even just being able to call someone and chat is better then nothing...
I'm sorry mama... Have you thought about looking for a play group? It's nice to meet up with other women who have kids around the same age. The kids can play together and you get some adult girl conversation! Play groups meet up in all kinds of places like malls that have play areas and museums or the zoo... Maybe you can try looking online for groups in your area?
Around here a lot of people use Meetup.com to organize playgroups.
Or you can look into free or inexpensive things to do with your older child to meet people.
We have several people who can watch our children but we don't go out very often alone. We get together with childless friends after our children are in bed to play board games (really they come over after supper and hang out for a bit before the kids are in bed). It does make me tired (playing until midnight and then up a few times with my children through the night before they wake for the day at 5:30 or so) but it also makes me happier.
I am not working right now and I get together with friends that have children (and are also home) a few times each week. It is pretty boring to stay home by ourselves for more then a couple of days in a row .
I hope you are able to meet some people and make some friends.
It might also do you some good to go out once a week by yourself. In the fall and winter I play volleyball once a week. In the summer I play softball. It is difficult to leave but I really like getting away to play a bit .
Sorry to hear this. I dont really have anyone to have LO either so we do stuff together. We go see other moms and their kids. We go to a group. I have found that since having LO I now spend more time with my friends who are parents than my single friends. Invite some other parents over for playdates or maybe make plans to go to the park together.
Don't blame yourself, blame those single "friends" who can't make time for you!
I am no longer friends with anyone I knew before I got pregnant.
You can find a mommy group, find someone who has children around your kid's age on your friend's list, or even go put an ad in with your YMCA babysitting classes. Those teens in there take that class for a reason! They want some extra money babysitting!