SO doesn't want me to BF.

posted 2nd Mar
I know its a little early to worry about it, but SO doesn't want me to even attempt to breastfeed.

Its all due to the fact that with DS I had an awful time breastfeeding, to the point where my mental health and DS's health suffered. Basically he was unable to digest my milk, for reasons that were never quite discovered. After seeing lactation consultants, a dietician, paediatricians, and a endocronologist it was decided by pretty much everyone that mix feeding was the way to go After 12 weeks my milk completely dried up and then I had an allergic reaction to the re-lactation meds .... it was then that my counsellor stepped in and said it was time to give up. I suffered horrific depression and guilt because of it.

So I can completely understand that SO doesn't want to watch me go through all that again, but he needs to understand that every child was different. Also if it happens again, I'm prepared for it this time.

I'm just so confused.
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I'm due October 6th (a boy), have 1 child & live in Perth, Australia
posted 2nd Mar
I've seen you post about this before, and wasn't the mental health part of this a HUGE issue in your relationship? I can understand him not wanting to have to go through all of that again.

Formula fed babies are just fine and healthy, and when you're dealing with TWO kids, and upholding your relationship, if you can avoid the same hardships that yall suffered through before, honestly, I would do it.
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posted 2nd Mar
That must have been really horrible, im sorry it went that way for you   I think if you really want to you should at least give it a go, but as soon as you start to feel too overwhelmed(if it gets to that point) then stop.
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I have 1 child & live in New Zealand
posted 2nd Mar
Quoting Elliot Reid:" That must have been really horrible, im sorry it went that way for you   I think if you really want ... [snip!] ... want to you should at least give it a go, but as soon as you start to feel too overwhelmed(if it gets to that point) then stop."
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I have 2 kids & live in Halifax, Nova Scotia
posted 2nd Mar
POS phone won't let me fix that.. Anyways I agree lol. I had a rough go bfing DD1 and only lasted 12 weeks as well. I've been successfully bfing DD2 12 weeks (as if today) with virtually no problems.
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I have 2 kids & live in Halifax, Nova Scotia
posted 2nd Mar
I see no harm in giving it at least a chance. If your realistic about the possible out come, then you are less likely to get depressed if it doesn't work out. And hey, at that point you can say, I gave it my best shot. Plus LO would at least have had some of that awesome Mama milk!!
I do understand your SO's worry though.
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I have 4 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Massachusetts
posted 2nd Mar
Quoting The Blissful Six:" I see no harm in giving it at least a chance. If your realistic about the possible out come, then you ... [snip!] ... gave it my best shot. Plus LO would at least have had some of that awesome Mama milk!! I do understand your SO's worry though."

Yeah I was highly suicidal and trying to convince SO to give DS up for adoption because I couldn't provide for my child. It was horrible.
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I'm due October 6th (a boy), have 1 child & live in Perth, Australia
posted 2nd Mar
Quoting Destiel:" Yeah I was highly suicidal and trying to convince SO to give DS up for adoption because I couldn't provide for my child. It was horrible."

Are you sure you didn't already have PPD? And then not being able to really breastfeed just put you over the edge?
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I have 4 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Massachusetts
posted 2nd Mar
Quoting The Blissful Six:" Are you sure you didn't already have PPD? And then not being able to really breastfeed just put you over the edge?"

Oh I'm 90% sure I had PPD ... and its odd they never diagnosed me because they watched me like a hawk (I've suffered severe anxiety since I was 14).
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I'm due October 6th (a boy), have 1 child & live in Perth, Australia
posted 2nd Mar
Quoting Destiel:" Oh I'm 90% sure I had PPD ... and its odd they never diagnosed me because they watched me like a hawk (I've suffered severe anxiety since I was 14)."

I had delayed PPD with two of my children. It didn't hit until they were 6 months old. With my third I had PPD right off the bat. I knew the warning signs and got help right away. With my 4th I've had no PPD at all. In fact my anxiety that I suffered with after my 3rd went away during my pregnancy and has not returned.
Hopefully, you won't have PPD this time, but at least you know the signs now.
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I have 4 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Massachusetts
posted 2nd Mar
Quoting Red Bottom:" I've seen you post about this before, and wasn't the mental health part of this a HUGE issue in your ... [snip!] ... upholding your relationship, if you can avoid the same hardships that yall suffered through before, honestly, I would do it. "

Ive got to agree!

I didnt BF this time around because it was too much stress/pressure on me last time and i'd end up crying each time baby wanted to feed & loathed it (similar issues to yours, tongue tie that went missed, lactose intolerance etc)

I went straight to the bottle this time - DH actually wanted me to try BFing again, mentally i couldn't handle it.. im still shaken up about it and the thought of BFing any more kids freaks me out..

Luckily i did FF because i've ended up with PPD and its been really nice to have a break & DH take LO when i wasn't coping.
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I have 2 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Cuba
posted 2nd Mar
id try just be realistic. it is possible the new baby wont have the same issues. if you feel yourself declining then stop. mommies health is important too
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I'm due November 27th, have 1 child & live in Parkersburg, West Virginia
posted 2nd Mar
Quoting Destiel:" Yeah I was highly suicidal and trying to convince SO to give DS up for adoption because I couldn't provide for my child. It was horrible."


Is it worth risking this again?
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