Baby Fever....

My sister is 18 as of November.
She honestly wants a baby. She baby sits my son Mason.
She and her boyfriend (hes 20) have been together for two years and 4 months.
She has a job and a secure home here with our family and her boyfriend is welcome here also.
His family loves her and she spends a lot of time over there.
I'm just scared for her. Any advice? I've been undecided if I'm against her getting pregnant or if I'm for her, because she was more than supportive during my pregnancy and her boyfriend wants this as much as she does.

Why don't they set goals to meet to push back the baby fever? For example get married, buy a house..

I'd be against it! I would talk to her and be like look you have your whole life ahead of you, worry about furthering your education and being a teenager and having fun before you have a child. Get your partying out of your system before you think to bring a child into this world.

Maybe just encourage her to go to college first or save a certain amt of money first. It's hard being a teen mom whether you're mature or not. I'd been living successfully on my own for a year and a half when I got preg and it was still hard. I've been going to school since dd was 3mos old and it's taken me waaaaay longer than if I'd just went right away. And it takes all of my money to raise my kids. And my time. I hate having to take my time away from my kids for work and school. And free time? What's that.

Quoting GL♣PK:" Why don't they set goals to meet to push back the baby fever? For example get married, buy a house.."

! i wouldnt encourage her getting pregnant at 17.

Quoting GL♣PK:" Why don't they set goals to meet to push back the baby fever? For example get married, buy a house.."

I completely agree with this! I was with my ex for 3 years after our son was born [he was 2 weeks and 2 days when our 3 year hit]. And I wished that we had waited until we were more stable. I had just turned 19 when I got pregnant.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Live-Laugh-Love:</b>" Quoting GL♣PK:" Why don't they set goals to meet to push back the baby fever? For example get married, buy a house.." ! i wouldnt encourage her getting pregnant at 17."</blockquote>



She turned 18 in November, I'm sorry I thought that was confusing!
As of November 26th 2012 she is 18

<blockquote><b>Quoting GL♣PK:</b>" Why don't they set goals to meet to push back the baby fever? For example get married, buy a house.."</blockquote>


This. Sometimes you can ward off baby fever if u keep yourself busy on something. I did that when I got discouraged while ttc. I focused on losing weight instead. It helped.

Quoting lolajessup:" <blockquote><b>Quoting GL♣PK:</b>" Why don't they set goals to meet to push back ... [snip!] ... u keep yourself busy on something. I did that when I got discouraged while ttc. I focused on losing weight instead. It helped."

Her thing is that, she is 18, has a job, they have been emotionally involved for three and a half years now.
She was supportive of me, as I had my son when I was 17 when I gave birth to him. I am 18 now, my birthday was Jan. 16th.
She was beyond helpful and I want to give that back to her, as she did for me.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mason's Momma♥:</b>" Her thing is that, she is 18, has a job, they have been emotionally involved for three and a half years ... [snip!] ... to him. I am 18 now, my birthday was Jan. 16th. She was beyond helpful and I want to give that back to her, as she did for me."</blockquote>




In that case, I would think you would be talking her out of wanting a baby NOW. I had my son when i was 21, out of college, living with my boyfriend and feel like that was very young considering what everyone else my age was doing. You can have a child anytime, but you can never get your freedom back. 18 is still so young, looking back I have grown SO much since then.. I was in a long term relationship then and am so different now, I would have gone crazy had I had to keep my ex in my life for the sake of us having a child.

Though I do understand where you want to be supportive as she has been for you.. I don't understand the rush I guess?

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mason's Momma♥:</b>" Her thing is that, she is 18, has a job, they have been emotionally involved for three and a half years ... [snip!] ... to him. I am 18 now, my birthday was Jan. 16th. She was beyond helpful and I want to give that back to her, as she did for me."</blockquote>


I would be supportive of an oops and if she got preg even if she's ttc. But I wouldn't be like "yeah ttc!!" you can be caring and kind and still bring up realistic questions and advice. Do u think she just wants a baby cause u have one?

As someone who is 18 and pregnant I could not support someone wanting to get pregnant at 18. Especially living in someone else's home. In my mind its not fair to the person supporting you to try and get pregnant and then have a baby for them to support. There are so many things to accomplish at 18 before having a baby like post secondary schooling, moving away from your parents and starting a career not just a job. As far as a relationship goes I have been with my boyfriend for almost 4 years and this baby was still almost the end of our relationship and even though she wasn't planned he wanted her more than I did at the beginning. Getting ready for this baby has been the hardest thing I.have ever had to do. Sure it could have been a lot easier had me and my boyfriend moved in with my mom since she was more than willing to have us move in but IMO part of being a mature and responsible parent is providing for your own child and yourself and not expecting someone else to do it.

Quoting lolajessup:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Mason's Momma♥:</b>" Her thing is that, she is 18, has ... [snip!] ... can be caring and kind and still bring up realistic questions and advice. Do u think she just wants a baby cause u have one?"

I am in no way telling her to do, she knows I'll stand by her side no matter what happens. Blood runs thick, and she is and always will be my sister. I'll forever love her.
Whatever she decides though, is her and her SO's choice though..
I don't think she wants a baby just because I have one, she can see Mason any time she wants to if that's the case. Mason loves his aunt, sometimes more than me IMO, but I guess that's the love of family.

Quoting Mason's Momma♥:" I am in no way telling her to do, she knows I'll stand by her side no matter what happens. Blood runs ... [snip!] ... time she wants to if that's the case. Mason loves his aunt, sometimes more than me IMO, but I guess that's the love of family."

mabe she wants your children to grow up close in age and to share the bond of motherhood together.....she is an adult and if she puts more value on being a mother than partying or going to college or whatever , thats her business.

Quoting 6 blessings so far....:" mabe she wants your children to grow up close in age and to share the bond of motherhood together.....she ... [snip!] ... is an adult and if she puts more value on being a mother than partying or going to college or whatever , thats her business."

I'm honestly not sure, I know she can make her own decisions, but I don't want her to get her hopes up and it fall through....