Forums > Debate & DiscussPage 1 <> 14by: Housewife & Co

re: ***

posted 25th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting ~mama~:</b>" Legally is changes from place to place, morally 12 weeks is plenty of time to decide if you want it or not. "</blockquote>




Unless you don't find out til later, or if there's conditions that aren't known until your ultrasound (most are around 20 weeks).
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I'm TTC since January '13, have 5 kids & live in Indiana
posted 25th Feb
Quoting BabyMamax5:" There's no way to test for my kids disorder. I love them and couldn't imagine life without them but I ... [snip!] ... life without them but I wish I could end their suffering. If only I had known before they were born things would be different."

I'm sorry for your struggles. I know there are plenty of disorders and complications that can't be detected before birth. I mean, some of that stuff isn't even detected until much further down the road. But I never said that babies born with disorders should be terminated or killed. I'm just saying, I haven't been in that situation and I wouldn't judge a woman for whatever she decided. I know it's a popular idea that all babies are lives with value, but if it's a baby that isn't loved enough to be valued by its own mother, for whatever reason, then that's incredibly sad but it's not my place to decide what happens to it. I'd much rather hear about a late term abortion than a child who was neglected, abused, or left to die a slow and painful death...and THAT stuff happens way more often than it should.
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I'm due August 20th (a girl), have 1 child & live in District of Columbia
posted 25th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting BabyMamax5:</b>" Personally I couldn't do it after feeling the baby move, but for anyone else I have no issues with late termination. And I deff don't have any problems with late term. if there's a medical problem."</blockquote>




Yeah. Like I said, I couldn't have one but to each his own. I think it should be a choice.
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I have 1 child & live in Washington, District of Columbia
posted 25th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting Sarah Bare-ah♡:</b>" People with downs syndrome can have severe health problems, heart defects just to name one."</blockquote>




Exactly. The only way I'd abort again is if it had medical issues or I'd die. DS is a reason I would...
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I'm TTC since January '13, have 5 kids & live in Indiana
posted 25th Feb
Quoting Stfu Shirley:" I'm sorry for your struggles. I know there are plenty of disorders and complications that can't be detected ... [snip!] ... who was neglected, abused, or left to die a slow and painful death...and THAT stuff happens way more often than it should."
I absolutely agree with you. And yes sometimes it does take awhile to detect anything. It took until my son was 2 to find out what he had and my daughter a yr later. There's a little girl that lives around the corner from me and her mother is TERRIBLE to her, there have been calls (too many to count) to child prot serv. and they have not done a damn thing. What is the point of having children if you are going to abuse them. In a weird way I think having an abortion is actually "saving" the child.
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I'm due August 31st (a boy), have 4 kids & 3 angel babies & live in Potsdam, New York
posted 25th Feb
It's merely a matter of active or passive euthanasia. Both are equally horrible but one only appears more horrible because we've taken an active role in terminating the life.

Why is it more acceptable to let the fetus die on its own volition? You're just as guilty in the death knowing it's going to die. The child (once born) has to struggle to hang on. Don't you think slow death via suffocation is a tad bit worse than having your heat stopped in utero?
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I have 4 kids & live in Wisconsin
posted 25th Feb
Quoting ~Ice Princess~:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Sarah Bare-ah♡:</b>" People with downs syndrome can have ... [snip!] ... Exactly. The only way I'd abort again is if it had medical issues or I'd die. DS is a reason I would..."

I have a cousin with severe DS, and he is an absolute treasure but omg it is SO hard on his parents. He's in his early 20's now and he can't be in school anymore, so they have to figure out what to do with him...there's so much that goes into raising a child with DS. You need so much strength and patience, and so many resources. It's so expensive.

Dh and I aren't equipped to raise a child with a severe disability like that, and I'm over 35, so with this pregnancy I took every genetic test available to me because I would seriously consider termination. I don't feel good saying that, or thinking it, but continuing with that pregnancy would cripple our dd's quality of life and take resources away from her, and it doesn't seem fair when the alternative would be terminating at 14-20 weeks. Fortunately, all but the dna test have come back and everything looks great, but until I got the NT scan and everything, I was fully braced to have to consider how to handle news like that. Something could still come up or go wrong. Having a child, even when you really want one, is a gamble. So idk what I'd do for sure if this baby had DS or something like that, which is why I can't say for sure that anybody else in a similar situation would be right or wrong, no matter what they chose. It wouldn't be so much a matter of not valuing the baby's life as it would be a matter of how much I value my 4-year-old's future and stability.
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I'm due August 20th (a girl), have 1 child & live in District of Columbia
posted 25th Feb
I don't think personally I'd have an abortion after 13 weeks unless it was a medical reason then I'd abort as soon as I could if they were not going to survive or it would harm my health in a grave way, as I have 4 other kids to take care of.

I don't care what others do, if someone wanted to abort on their due date and it was legal to do as such I wouldn't honestly care. If it's not my body, it's not my choice. Just being honest here.
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I'm due August 25th (a boy), have 4 kids & live in Illinois
posted 25th Feb
Quoting Anja[VBA2C GRAD]:" I don't think personally I'd have an abortion after 13 weeks unless it was a medical reason then I'd ... [snip!] ... date and it was legal to do as such I wouldn't honestly care. If it's not my body, it's not my choice. Just being honest here."
I agree with you. Not my body- do what you want.
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I'm due August 31st (a boy), have 4 kids & 3 angel babies & live in Potsdam, New York
posted 25th Feb
Quoting Take me as I am:" When you find out your pregnant that's me and everyone will have an opinion"

Edit: Never mind.
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posted 25th Feb
Quoting D/JHO:" I'm asking morally."
To better explain my stance, I recognize that politically and socially I can not take that choice away from a pregnant woman. But morally, I hate abortion and 100% disagree with her actions, so I doesn't sit well with me through the entire pregnancy. Just my opinion.
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posted 26th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting BabyMamax5:</b>" I got my NT results back today and everything seems to be ok, but you can't check for my kids disorder this way so I'm still having doubts..."</blockquote>


Hope this doesnt come across wrong, but are you able to get a amnio (sp?) Would that pick up the disorder to give you piece of mind or prepare you either way?
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I'm due August 28th (a girl), have 3 kids & 2 angel babies & live in New Zealand
posted 26th Feb
Quoting Take me as I am:" When you find out your pregnant that's me and everyone will have an opinion"

EXACTLY!!!
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I have 1 child & live in Georgia
posted 26th Feb
Double post
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I'm due August 28th (a girl), have 3 kids & 2 angel babies & live in New Zealand
posted 26th Feb
I have to say for my I don't think I could get one. But if I had to I would do it before 12 weeks. But for others they should be allowed to whenever they want.
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I have 1 child & live in Oxnard, California
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