re: How would you feel if your SO said this to you.

Quoting xTJ:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Mrs. Sherwood:</b>" Lol, just because I know of marrying for ... [snip!] ... by saying Marriage existed before legal documents did but it only added to what I'm trying to get across so thanks very much  "

You married for legal reasons. I married my husband because we wanted to religiously and otherwise commit ourselves to one another forever. You can try to downplay the importance of marriage as an institution between two people who truly love each other, but you clearly don't understand it so you aren't qualified to make those judgements. To me, marriage is not a "piece of paper", it is not about tax benefits or being able to make medical decisions for him. It's about being in love and wanting to be his wife. If you can't understand that, I'm done attemtping to explain it to you over and over again. As others have stated, you aren't the brightest and most legitimate debates are lost on you. Have a good one.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mrs. Sherwood:</b>" You married for legal reasons. I married my husband because we wanted to religiously and otherwise commit ... [snip!] ... and over again. As others have stated, you aren't the brightest and most legitimate debates are lost on you. Have a good one."</blockquote>




Uh huh because my view of Marriage doesn't match yours that means I don't understand it.
Because I associate legal decisions with legal documents that is completely confusing to you.
Because I associate love and commitment with what is in each others heart this is apparently some unheard of, alien idea too.

You believe that if someone doesn't agree with exactly how you see things that makes you right and them wrong, apparently having no concept of what an "opinion" is but I can't have a legitimate debate because my intelligence is lacking........ Yeah you have a good one too  

<blockquote><b>Quoting xTJ:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting 624582:</b>" All that the the joint deduction is, is what the ... [snip!] ... changes that are happening here are causing huge protests and riots in other parts of Europe but it hasn't happened here yet."</blockquote>




Well if that doesn't sound like the US. :/

<blockquote><b>Quoting Captain Lauren + ?:</b>" Now that I am older I understand the why they did it did in the beginning. Your 16 year old daughter ... [snip!] ... they can. They not going to be the parents of the bride but guests and my mother hates that. She wants to control everything"</blockquote>


That's smurfed. They wanted you to get an abortion? Not letting you leave the house in pre-term labour. Essentially playing a part in whether your child lived or died... How can they claim to be pro-life? Wow. I'm sorry you had to deal with that at such a young age.

Your profile says your 20 now? &Your partner stuck by you all that time through all that crazy while you guys were young...? Sounds like he's a pretty good guy. Whether he wants to marry or not. I wouldn't be questioning his commitment to you honestly, but I do understand where everyone is coming from when they say you need I work out what it'll mean to you if you don't marry now, or in the future even...

Your profile also says you's are engaged?

<blockquote><b>Quoting Ryloonjimama:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Captain Lauren + ?:</b>" Now that I am older I understand the ... [snip!] ... I work out what it'll mean to you if you don't marry now, or in the future even... Your profile also says you's are engaged?"</blockquote>




I can't help but wonder on the pre-term labor part if in their minds, they weren't associating it as her leaving to be with the SO and not actually in labor. As focused as they were on the anger of the relationship, it almost seems like nothing around them would have mattered.

I'm on your husbands side tbh. I want to get married but I don't want to do it until I have the money to do it the way I want it. It's not that I don't want to marry my SO, I just want it to be perfect and special and it wont be if I don't get what I want.. Because that's just how I am  

Quoting Ryloonjimama:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Captain Lauren + ?:</b>" Now that I am older I understand the ... [snip!] ... I work out what it'll mean to you if you don't marry now, or in the future even... Your profile also says you's are engaged?"

We've been "engaged" since with we lost Trinity. No ring or anything.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Captain Lauren + ?:</b>" We've been "engaged" since with we lost Trinity. No ring or anything. "</blockquote>




Would you call it official or unofficial?

Quoting Not tellin:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Captain Lauren + ?:</b>" We've been "engaged" since with we ... [snip!] ... "engaged" since with we lost Trinity. No ring or anything. "</blockquote> Would you call it official or unofficial?"

unofficial.

the hell. i'm not even changing my name. why the hell would i? lol. it's old fashioned and i love my birth name. would never change it. ever.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Captain Lauren + ?:</b>" unofficial. "</blockquote>




With it being "unofficial", I would have that conversation with him. I would sit down and really figure out if the two of you have the same 5 year and 10 year plans. If not, it doesn't make either of you bad people. As we grow, we tend to discover more about ourselves. There are deal breakers in relationships and things we can live with. Only you know what your deal breakers are. You have to stick with them. Otherwise, you are setting yourself up for misery. Good Luck!