posted 19th Feb
Thanks everyone. It's great to know there is a huge support system behind me. If there wasn't I wouldn't know what to do.
It still doesn't feel real, I still feel like I'm gonna get a text from him, or a call, or he's just gonna show up at my house. I'm as okay as I can be.
quoteposted 19th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting ^.^ Chippermunkk:</b>" How do you deal with it? My SO died in a car wreck early this morning. :/ I'm still in shock. I don't ... [snip!] ... pronounced dead at the scene, Wyant said. This incident remains under investigation by the S.C. Highway Patrol."</blockquote>
Omg mama im so sorry. please let me know if you need anything im getting over the flu but please im here for you im so sorry
quoteposted 20th Feb
"Thank you guys.
So many thoughts are going through my head right now. still in shock, but now its more then that, now it's worrying about everything that comes along with death. I know where the money I have is going (it's not much) Tomorrow should be his servicees. I'm glad theres people who support me online and in person. I've never dealt with death. only person I know who died, was my dad, but i didn't really know him. I didn't talk to him. but this is a whole new thing for me. "
It is good to know though that other people saw that he loved me, its comforting. his ex girlfriend messaged me and was like "you dont know me, but i know you have heard about me. I want to thank you for being there when i left, to keep him going, and for seeing the awesome, caring and loving man he was. it didnt work between me and dustin for a reason, and the reason is you. he talked to me about you, we stayed friends, dustin and i. he had found him a good woman"
Then one of his really good friends was like "I've known him for 8plus years, and he was always mr grump. and mr. personality. Would bite your head off if you looked at him funny. But then you came along, he started changing for the better. he was smilling and laughing more. You could tell he loved, and still loves, present tence, you. "
It's good hearing those things, feels really good honestly. His really good friend does tattoos and says if I want a memorial one he'd gladly do it. I plan on it, don't know what yet, but I do plan on it. He also found his phone and said I could have all the pictures. and If I wanted them, which I do, I can have pictures of the wreck. I think that will help a little bit.
It's just sad to know that not even a week ago we were in walmart checking out, and he was like "I could die tomorrow" I was like well, don't die, I want you here." he was like I don't plan on it, but i do stupid thigs and i'm stubborn" there wasn't more truth to that.
Everything replays in my head, the good we had, the bad we had, the great we had. Every single moment. I keep replaying our conversations, I keep thinking about our plans.
He was an only child, and his mom wasn't even supposed to have kids. They lost the only thing they had. His dad didn't even know he went out that night.
So many thoughts. so many feelings. so many prayers.
quoteposted 20th Feb
Oh hun, I'm so so sorry. We havent talked in a while, but you can pm me whenever you need to. I lost my brother the same way back in September. It's a long road and it's wonderful seeing you have so much support to help you through it
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