re: so embarrassed... (sex post)

Quoting Zombie Mom ✄:" my dh has never been able to, together for 7 years, but no man has ever given me one... so I don't worry about it. i can use a vibe if I want to. but we still have fun without me Oing"

my SO doesnt like the idea of vibrators. he thinks if i get off with one i wont want him anymore cuz he cant get me off. he doesnt mind the clit vibrators while were together though

Quoting KTSKDR:" we have trouble with some positions bcuz i have endometriosis so like doggy style hurts me pretty bad. sadly we have to stick to a few simple positions "

Then, I would get the positions you're comfortable with and get your hands down there to do your magic!

And I agree with the other poster about relaxing! When I'm stressed out --- he can try EVERYTHING and it just won't happen. Women are more cerebral.... we need to be in the right frame of mind to have a good time!

How about if you get yourself "worked up" beforehand and then have him enter you? Trust me, no man will turn down an opportunity to watch you pleasure yourself! And when you get to groovin, finish yourself off as you go!

Quoting KTSKDR:" i know i think this might be the problem. hes the only man ive actually enjoyed sex with. and after our son was born it got so much better for some reason"

I wasn't able to reach orgasm with my other sexual partners before DH..

When we started dating/having sex etc i was in shock because i didn't know sex could be that amazing.

I thought the movies and the 'fireworks' etc was a big fat lie LOL!!!  

When i had my first orgasm with him i was in total shock.. the ONLY reason i can reach orgasm with him is because im so relaxed, i feel totally comfortable and dont think about anything else except the moment while we're having sex.

Maybe have a relaxing bath before hand, make yourself feel sexy and try - while relaxing!  

Dont go into it with any expectations, just enjoy each other.

Quoting I♡C.:" Watching. I'm in the same boat."

i hate it!!

Quoting Daesey:" Then, I would get the positions you're comfortable with and get your hands down there to do your magic! ... [snip!] ... man will turn down an opportunity to watch you pleasure yourself! And when you get to groovin, finish yourself off as you go!"

im thinking this is the problem too much trying not enough enjoyment

Quoting KTSKDR:" i hate it!!"

Except I can't seem to admit it to DH. I totally fake em'.  

Quoting KTSKDR:" im thinking this is the problem too much trying not enough enjoyment "

Eh, as someone else stated get that vibrator out and get urself going before having sex. It DOES help!

Quoting I♡C.:" Except I can't seem to admit it to DH. I totally fake em'.  "

i used to then i came clean to him here recently. he didnt take it well just in the fact that it kinda hurt his ego but then he was like why didnt you tell me i want you to enjoy it too. and now his main goal is sexing me up good. you should tell him

Quoting I♡C.:" Eh, as someone else stated get that vibrator out and get urself going before having sex. It DOES help!"

yeah maybe i can get him to do foreplay with a clit stimulator instead of just during sex

Quoting KTSKDR:" yeah maybe i can get him to do foreplay with a clit stimulator instead of just during sex"

See. That's a good idea. We JUST began including sex toys in our "sex life". It sure does help things quite a bit. Before, I was just using toys in my alone time and it felt so awkward Lol.

Quoting I♡C.:" See. That's a good idea. We JUST began including sex toys in our "sex life". It sure does help things quite a bit. Before, I was just using toys in my alone time and it felt so awkward Lol."

i never used anything until he brought it to me and was like i wanna try this and see if we can get you there. but it didnt help for some reason but using it away from sex was when i had my first O

There is a product that you can rub on your clit im not sure what it would be called in the USA but her its called purrr its a gel that sends extra blood to you clit and also slightly pulls the "hood". It is the best smurf ever!!!! Of all the people I know who have it I havnt heard anyone say it doesnt work. It only takes a couple of minutes to kick in and you good to go

You could also look at getting a c*ck ring which will make him last longer while not wearing condoms, it also makes some guys orgasams better to so its a win win

How about just having sex a couple of time with the intention of NOT having the O --- just have sex, try stuff, new positions and just see what feels good... without worrying about having an orgasm. I have sex with my hubby a lot w/out the intention of me "getting there" --- just for his pleasure and I actually find myself enjoying the feeling of it. Sometimes, I get so hot that I tell him to grab my toy out of the drawer & I get off really easy. Other times, I just like to relax and not worry about whether I can get there or not. Like I said, women are cerebral, so sometimes you just have to drop your mind out of it.

Then, the next few times.... just take things slow... take the pressure off.... don't feel like it HAS to happen or you'll be letting him down or yourself. There is no shame in using a clit stimulator --- your SO shouldn't be jealous of something like a bullet. Sometimes, I'll warm up with that & then when Hubby gets in, I'll slide it between us and we both have a good time!

Good Luck!!

You're trying too hard. It took FOREVER for SO to get me to O, and when he finally did O. M. G. You have to really relax, and just direct him to what feels really good. And take your time don't try to rush it. It's good you can at least get one yourself, maybe try doing it yourself while he's pumpin away?