Why is this such an issue!

My daughter will be 1 on Monday, and frankly my children were blessed with hair from the get go. All of my kids were born with full heads of hair, and my girl's hair is already down to the middle of her back if her slight curls are straight, like when wet. Well anyways, she throws an utter fit when I go to
brush her hair and put it up so it won't get "stuff" and food in it as easily. Well my husband doesn't like to hear her crying or to see me basically become a python to hold her so I can at least brush it. He wants me to just leave her be since she doesn't like it, but I can't. I feel like a horrible mother when I see her hair is a tangled icky mess. My husband says we just wash it and suddenly "tada!" it looks great, but that is only for about 30 seconds after her bath. Any ideas on how I can make this easier? My husband doesn't understand, but with her hair as long as it is I can't let it just get into a tangled mess that will also hurt when I have to wash it and pray I don't yank on tangles. And frankly I don't want to cut it, it just wouldn't be worth it in the end for me because she would still not let me brush it with it being short.

Tell him you need his help with brushing/combing out.

Personal hygiene is important and they need to learn it early. She cant just not do it because she doesnt like it and y'all cant let her. Same with teeth brushing, nail clipping, showers/baths, washing her face, changing her underwear(when shes older) He really needs to get on board.

Hair detangler is a life saver for us. Oldest DD has curly/frizzy hair and it sucks trying to brush it. We also got a brush that helps with frizz (can't remember the name) and DD will let me brush her hair or do it herself. I used to have to almost hold DD down to brush her hair but if i didn't it would of looked like a rats nest on her head.

completely agree with you Sarah, he doesn't help with alot of the hygiene stuff, he likes being the fun parent.... it just makes it harder on me. My husband is the type of parent who wants nothing more than for his kids to smile and giggle with him. He is the type to buy them toys when they ask for it and when I confront him about it he tells me "they wanted it, and batted their long lashes at me." He is a sucker when it comes to them all.

use a de-tangling spray. I use to have to soak my DD's hair in it and then brush it but it kept it from hurting

Quoting ღ.ღ.ღ:" Hair detangler is a life saver for us. Oldest DD has curly/frizzy hair and it sucks trying to brush it. ... [snip!] ... I used to have to almost hold DD down to brush her hair but if i didn't it would of looked like a rats nest on her head."

I'll give a detangler a try, any suggestions on which one?

Quoting Momma of 2 babies and a t:" completely agree with you Sarah, he doesn't help with alot of the hygiene stuff, he likes being the ... [snip!] ... him about it he tells me "they wanted it, and batted their long lashes at me." He is a sucker when it comes to them all."

I'm sorry but i'd put that smurf to a stop right now, there isn't anything wrong with being a fun parent but when they get older they will use that against you, he needs to learn to say no. You can be their friend and parent but being a parent comes first.

Quoting Momma of 2 babies and a t:" I'll give a detangler a try, any suggestions on which one?"

I get the kids suave detangler, also when i give dd a bath i french braid her hair, it keeps it nice and is a lot easier to brush out when i take her hair down, plus in the morning i'm not fighting with her to brush it.

Circle of friends makes a good detangler I've use it on my hair before. So does Suave kids

Quoting ღ.ღ.ღ:" I'd put that smurf to a stop right now, there isn't anything wrong with being a fun parent but when they ... [snip!] ... they will use that against you, he needs to learn to say no. You can be their friend and parent but being a parent comes first."

Exactly! I try to explain to him about needing to have balance. I have a great balance with out eldest daughter (who is 16), she knows that I am always there for her with anything she wants or needs, but when I say no it means no and going to her Dad is not going to help and will in fact cause me to get very angry.

Quoting Momma of 2 babies and a t:" I'll give a detangler a try, any suggestions on which one?"

this is amazing and cheap. you can pick it up at walmart for like 1.25

Quoting Sarah Bare-ah♡:" Circle of friends makes a good detangler I've use it on my hair before. So does Suave kids"

Thank you, I'll take a look at both of them.

Quoting Momma of 2 babies and a t:" Exactly! I try to explain to him about needing to have balance. I have a great balance with out eldest ... [snip!] ... or needs, but when I say no it means no and going to her Dad is not going to help and will in fact cause me to get very angry."

I used to do this with my parents, my dad almost always let me have what i want which in turned i ended up being a spoiled brat. I'd ask my mom and she'd say no so i'd go to my dad and he'd say yes and then i'd run to my mom and go "i'm daddys girl and he said yes" which would piss her off. I don't want my kids doing that so thankfully when one of us says no it means no. When my mom came to visit a few months back she taught the kids to bat their eyelashes at me to get what they wanted and i put a stop to that real quick.

Quoting ღ.ღ.ღ:" I used to do this with my parents, my dad almost always let me have what i want which in turned i ended ... [snip!] ... a few months back she taught the kids to bat their eyelashes at me to get what they wanted and i put a stop to that real quick."

ah, the joys of parental revenge... my Mom tries to teach my kids some of the stuff I pulled, and I put a stop to that crap quick. I wonder why it doesn't work as well with the hubs. But, at least we are on the same page with the no idea. If she asks me for something I immediately ask what her Dad said and then once I get her answer I turn to my husband and ask what he actually said She doesnt try to be slick about that anymore.

Quoting Momma of 2 babies and a t:" ah, the joys of parental revenge... my Mom tries to teach my kids some of the stuff I pulled, and I put ... [snip!] ... then once I get her answer I turn to my husband and ask what he actually said She doesnt try to be slick about that anymore."

My kids have started pulling that one, and DH and I have fell for it a few times. My kids will ask for something of mine or DH's and they'll run to ask us and then run back and say "daddy/mommy" said yes, but actually they didn't even ask or if they did the answer wasn't yes.