Switching Doulas...very late

I have a friend due a couple days after me and she has decided that she is not comfortable with her doula. She told me that she imagines she will not want her in the room or around during her birth. I have asked her why and she said she is not sure. She says her doula is a very nice woman she just doesn't feel a "connection" with her. When she first picked her she felt fine, but as the time gets closer she is starting to wonder more and more if she was the right person.
What should I tell her? She isn't on Gaga so I told her I'd ask you ladies.
Should she stick it out? She has already paid her deposit and money IS an issue.
Should she just go doulaless and hope her DH is enough?
I feel so bad for her.

My doula had a cancelation policy. Has she tried talking to her about she feels? Maybe they just need some good communication. I would never allow someone to be at my birth I wasnt comfortable with.

Personally I would only get a doula if my SO wasn't there. Even then I might want to labor on my own. The nurse I had during delivery was very nice and I chatted with her while my SO slept up until it was time to push.

Quoting Jennybananna:" My doula had a cancelation policy. Has she tried talking to her about she feels? Maybe they just need some good communication. I would never allow someone to be at my birth I wasnt comfortable with."

I'm not sure if she has a concellation policy but I know she hasn't spoken to her. She said it will make it more awkward.

Quoting CL & DJs Mommy:" I'm not sure if she has a concellation policy but I know she hasn't spoken to her. She said it will make it more awkward."

Open communication is key. There should of been a contract they both signed out lining everything.

Quoting Jennybananna:" Open communication is key. There should of been a contract they both signed out lining everything. "

I agree. I think she may have jumped the gun because she was the cheapest and they are tight on money.
She made a mistake, but idk how to help her now.

Quoting CL & DJs Mommy:" I agree. I think she may have jumped the gun because she was the cheapest and they are tight on money. She made a mistake, but idk how to help her now."

This may sound harsh but she needs to be an adult and as uncomfortable as it sounds she needs to address this with the doula. I had a doula and she was great after our first meeting. Things started to go downhill and I regret not saying anything. I should of switched or just not had one at all. Its awkward I totally get that but she hired a doula for a reason and if they arent fulfilling her needs then she needs to speak up.

Quoting Jennybananna:" This may sound harsh but she needs to be an adult and as uncomfortable as it sounds she needs to address ... [snip!] ... I totally get that but she hired a doula for a reason and if they arent fulfilling her needs then she needs to speak up."

That was a bit harsh but it makes the most sense. Especially if you have gone through it =)

For my clients I charge $100 down payment that is to 'hold' their slot so I dont book over for the month or near their EDD. it is also non refundable if they chose to switch after picking me or if they fail to let me know when they go into labor. I also expect full payment before 36weeks which becomes non refundable if the 'mistake' is their fault IE choosing to switch late in the game or failure to alert me.

She should never have chosen her doula if she didnt feel that intimate connection with her. Same a doula shouldnt stay with a client without that connection either. But it is a business and you're friend may still have to pay her some money for her time.

Quoting CL & DJs Mommy:" That was a bit harsh but it makes the most sense. Especially if you have gone through it =)"

I wish her the best of luck. What was her primary reason for having a doula in the first place?

Seeing that you said she is due a couple days after you and you're due in a 8 days yeah, my client would still be paying me for my time...idk how many appts her doula had with her..but I have at least 6 between 20weeks and 40weeks....Picking a doula is important and she should have 'shopped around' for the best fit and not price wise. A doula for a pregnancy and labor is a huge choice and she should have picked someone she is comfortable with...sorry she feels that way. I hope she can get out of it without wasting her doulas time....That is seriously hard to swallow but I put a ton of effort into my clients that is why I have that holding policy so I dont get screwed in the end.

Quoting Cassidy & Canaan's momma:" For my clients I charge $100 down payment that is to 'hold' their slot so I dont book over for the month ... [snip!] ... without that connection either. But it is a business and you're friend may still have to pay her some money for her time. "

She has paid her $100 deposit, but that is it. I told her she might still have to pay her. She liked her at first, she didn't expressed an uncomfortable feeling (to me at least) until about a month ago and I can only assume its getting worse.

Quoting CL & DJs Mommy:" She has paid her $100 deposit, but that is it. I told her she might still have to pay her. She liked ... [snip!] ... she didn't expressed an uncomfortable feeling (to me at least) until about a month ago and I can only assume its getting worse."

to tell you the truth if she is feeling this way the doula is most likely as well and as the professional should have brought it up by now to help make things better..

Quoting Cassidy & Canaan's momma:" Seeing that you said she is due a couple days after you and you're due in a 8 days yeah, my client would ... [snip!] ... to swallow but I put a ton of effort into my clients that is why I have that holding policy so I dont get screwed in the end."

I know. =( It is a sad and frustrating situation all around. I feel bad for her and I feel bad for the doula. I just really do not know what to tell her.

Quoting CL & DJs Mommy:" I know. =( It is a sad and frustrating situation all around. I feel bad for her and I feel bad for the doula. I just really do not know what to tell her."

Did she have a legal binding contract with her doula?