re: Seriously, so angry...

<blockquote><b>Quoting Nathaniel'sMom:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting 3 little monsters:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Nathaniel'sMom:</b>" ... [snip!] ... charge HER rent. She since clarified that she doesn't live there so she bitching about a house that she doesn't even live at."</blockquote>


Why shouldn't she, she goes over there obviously and used the microwave. Why shouldn't she say something? They are in a relationship and its affecting her as well.

<blockquote><b>Quoting 3 little monsters:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Nathaniel'sMom:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Levis ... [snip!] ... Like laws about taking things that don't belong to you? What about those ones? Petty theft I think it's called."</blockquote>




He LET them take it and didn't care they had until she pointed out that what she uses to heat up her baby food. You might want to reread the thread.

Quoting Nathaniel'sMom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting 3 little monsters:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Nathaniel'sMom:</b>" ... [snip!] ... didn't care they had until she pointed out that what she uses to heat up her baby food. You might want to reread the thread."

I think she said that happened when she was there...not when he was there. And he didn't seem to care because he doesn't want to start drama and mess up the process of buying the house...at least that is what she said. Or something along those lines.

If he isn't willing to establish boundaries, then that's that, you have no recourse. There is no legal standing to tell them they can't enter a premises they own. Also, if the microwave was gramma's & her entire estate is joint property, taking it is rude & what not, but technically within their rights.

It seems obvious that he should cover the utlities & what not if he's the only one using them. If the house was was empty, there would be minimal to no utility bills (here we keep heat on in empty homes to prevent freezing pipes, but it is kept low). Covering your light bill is like covering your cell phone bill. It's kind of "duh" when you are the one inhabiting the home. My taxes & insurance alone are around $400/month....so if someone was living here & covering their own utilities & NOT paying me $400 - I'd be OUT each month they stayed when I could be collecting rent...and if the home isn't in his name, then the insurance & taxes are being paid by someone else....hopefully, because if not, you can loose the house ot back taxes as well & then no one would have it. There is no time when your home is just "paid off" and you have no monthly expense to just keep it - you always have taxes & insurance, forever. We have paid off our mortgage, we will always pay taxes & insurance.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Nathaniel'sMom:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting 3 little monsters:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Nathaniel'sMom:</b>" ... [snip!] ... didn't care they had until she pointed out that what she uses to heat up her baby food. You might want to reread the thread."</blockquote>



Guess I will because I didn't see her say he let them take it, just that he didn't care until she told him she used it.

Quoting 3 little monsters:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Nathaniel'sMom:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting 3 little ... [snip!] ... Guess I will because I didn't see her say he let them take it, just that he didn't care until she told him she used it."

That is because he didn't let them take it! At least that is what I read lol

Quoting justanothamotha:" If he isn't willing to establish boundaries, then that's that, you have no recourse. There is no legal ... [snip!] ... it - you always have taxes & insurance, forever. We have paid off our mortgage, we will always pay taxes & insurance."

Oh yes, he paid the taxes and the insurance, everything has been taken care of by him since the passing of his gramma.

Quoting Levis Mommy:" Oh yes, he paid the taxes and the insurance, everything has been taken care of by him since the passing of his gramma."

Ou tof curiosity, did they grow up in this house.

I live in a "family home" BTW which is a whole different topic entirely & there is always some of this behavior, even when they don't own the home. Our house tends to still be treated like the "family home' since Dh's parents moved out of state, because it's also where his step sibs lived when they were kids & their parents were still married. My FIL live dher with his 1st wife when they ahd kids, they divorced & she kept the house & the kids lived here, then when she wanted to ell & he had married Dh's mom, he bought it back & they moved in. then we bought it from my IL's. So I do get the way people act so casual about it. - if they grew up there or ever lived there as a minor, you will ALWAYS deal with a certain amount of them feeling like a piece of it belongs to them too. Right or wrong, it's the way they feel about it, EVEN if they won't admit it. NO ONE ever treated our apartment the way they treat our house. ;)

Quoting *B & D Mommy*:" That is because he didn't let them take it! At least that is what I read lol"

Me either and I'm pretty sure I would have paid attention to that detail considering I've gone on and on about them stealing, LOL

Quoting justanothamotha:" Ou tof curiosity, did they grow up in this house. I live in a "family home" BTW which is a whole different ... [snip!] ... the way they feel about it, EVEN if they won't admit it. NO ONE ever treated our apartment the way they treat our house. ;)"

They aunts/mom did yes, as they were growing up. Then my boyfriend moved in the home when he was 17 to take care of his gram because she was sick and needed living assistance. He's now 26, and she recently passed. The aunts are coming into the home and taking things with the intention to sell, which yes, I realize they can do that even though I don't see it morally okay. (Because my boyfriend has lived there so long, I feel as if it's wrong for them to not even give him the chance to buy it, they refuse to sell it anything inside the home to him, from dishes to furniture.) They see it as he's getting the house and he doesn't deserve anything else, not as, he's buying the house. Not getting it for free, or even discounted.

Quoting Levis Mommy:" They aunts/mom did yes, as they were growing up. Then my boyfriend moved in the home when he was 17 ... [snip!] ... the house and he doesn't deserve anything else, not as, he's buying the house. Not getting it for free, or even discounted. "

That was really for gramma to handle though & whether it feels good to admit it or not, she should have outlined something differently for him if he was to have more than he is getting. Otherwise, this is sadly the normal smurf families go through after the death of the "matriarch" or "patriarch". It happens all.the.time. People ought to write better wills.

Quoting justanothamotha:" That was really for gramma to handle though & whether it feels good to admit it or not, she should ... [snip!] ... go through after the death of the "matriarch" or "patriarch". It happens all.the.time. People ought to write better wills."

Absolutely, I just have to learn I guess to take a step back, take my feelings and personal morals out of everything and let it run its course. Its just frustrating to see somebody I love get walked all over and treated like whatever lives on the bottom of your shoe! You know?

Everyone is concerned over how much "rent" they should be paying. How many times has she mentioned the house is paid off? Not everyone demands rent from their family members. I know my grandma (or anyone else) would never charge me rent. As long as they pay all of the bills, what is wrong with them (or him) living there rent free?

They may own the home...but they still sound rude. If I owned a house and people were living there until they purchased it, I would at least call before strolling in.