Forums > Debate & DiscussPage 1 <> 8by: Just a Mama of 2

re: I NEED HELP!!! AM I RIGHT??

posted 6th Feb
Quoting Jenna+1:" <blockquote><b>Quoting That-Girl:</b>" Actually, as a married woman and a social worker ... [snip!] ... and wait for it to get worse? Please remind me never to go to you if I'm a victim in need. You must suck at your job."


Its difficult to see your perspective when you constantly end up name calling and throwing insults.

To be perfectly honest, it completly invalidates your points.
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I'm due July 1st (a girl), have 1 child & live in St Catharines, Ontario
posted 6th Feb
Quoting That-Girl:" Huh? It is my husbands responsibilty to go get me gas and hand me money? She is completely able to ... [snip!] ... just won't allow it, that is questionable but up to this point I haven't heard that he has said no. Just that its not provided."

Have you read this thread at all?

He does not put money into their joint account so she is unable to go to an ATM to get cash. He takes the car with the car seat so that she CAN'T take it.
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I have 2 kids & live in Havana, Cuba
posted 6th Feb
Quoting That-Girl:" Huh? It is my husbands responsibilty to go get me gas and hand me money? She is completely able to ... [snip!] ... just won't allow it, that is questionable but up to this point I haven't heard that he has said no. Just that its not provided."


He Keeps all the money in HIS account. Gives her nothing.

I hope to god you aren't actually an social worker for domestic violence.

Also, go back and read her other posts.
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I have 1 child & live in Rochester, New York
posted 6th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting That-Girl:</b>" Its difficult to see your perspective when you constantly end up name calling and throwing insults. To be perfectly honest, it completly invalidates your points."</blockquote>




Are you kidding me? I haven't called you a name. You are just further proving my point about your comprehension.
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I have 1 child & live in Beach Haven, New Jersey
posted 6th Feb
Quoting Just a Mama of 2:" What about how when my son was first born - my husband used to take the carseat to work ON PURPOSE beccause ... [snip!] ... help I could go to the neighbors or flag someone down and have them stop and call him at work. Is that controlling behavior??"



Then he sounds like a jerk and probably an abusive one at that.

Your OP didn't state any of those things though. It states that he was borrowing your car and leaving you his.

I don't think I can be expected to know about other unrelated instances when those details are not provided.

If that it the case, I'd advise looking into some local resources for victims of DV.

Good luck.
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I'm due July 1st (a girl), have 1 child & live in St Catharines, Ontario
posted 6th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting That-Girl:</b>" Then he sounds like a jerk and probably an abusive one at that. Your OP didn't state any of those ... [snip!] ... details are not provided. If that it the case, I'd advise looking into some local resources for victims of DV. Good luck."</blockquote>




Oh thank God, finally some sense.
Maybe you just don't know how this site works but let me help you... Op's are not going to post their whole relationship history in the first post. If anything is unclear you ask! Which others have and OP has answered with this same type of info. Hence why everyone was saying he was abusive. You should really read everything before putting in your non educated sense.
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I have 1 child & live in Beach Haven, New Jersey
posted 6th Feb
Quoting Jenna+1:" <blockquote><b>Quoting That-Girl:</b>" Then he sounds like a jerk and probably an ... [snip!] ... Hence why everyone was saying he was abusive. You should really read everything before putting in your non educated sense."

Exactly what I was thinking.
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I have 2 kids & live in Illinois
posted 6th Feb
Quoting Jenna+1:" <blockquote><b>Quoting That-Girl:</b>" Then he sounds like a jerk and probably an ... [snip!] ... Hence why everyone was saying he was abusive. You should really read everything before putting in your non educated sense."


I have been on this site for years, but thanks.

Quite frankly, it is the poster's responsibility to provide additional details and backstory.
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I'm due July 1st (a girl), have 1 child & live in St Catharines, Ontario
posted 6th Feb
Quoting That-Girl:" I have been on this site for years, but thanks. Quite frankly, it is the poster's responsibility to provide additional details and backstory."


Or you could read through everything and actually see that others asked to further understand the entire situation..that way you would see what else she had to say about it.
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I have 2 kids & live in Illinois
posted 6th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting That-Girl:</b>" I find many of you ladies pretty quick to pull the abuse card. Why? Because he doesn't want to get stuck ... [snip!] ... what. He goes a further distance more often. Of course he would take the more gas efficent car. Take the car seats and swap."</blockquote>




He is isolating her from talking to people, gets pissed when she wants to go anywhere, and doesn't let her have any money.. What do YOU call that?
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I have 1 child & live in Indianapolis, Indiana
posted 6th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting That-Girl:</b>" Actually, as a married woman and a social worker in the field of domestic violence my opinion is completely valid."</blockquote>




It's not when you aren't recognizing classic abuse signs right under your nose.
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I have 1 child & live in Indianapolis, Indiana
posted 6th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting That-Girl:</b>" Huh? It is my husbands responsibilty to go get me gas and hand me money? She is completely able to ... [snip!] ... just won't allow it, that is questionable but up to this point I haven't heard that he has said no. Just that its not provided."</blockquote>


When he won't let her get a job and leaves her a car with no gas how do you suppose she get to those places?
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I have 1 child & live in Indianapolis, Indiana
posted 6th Feb
<blockquote><b>Quoting That-Girl:</b>" Then he sounds like a jerk and probably an abusive one at that. Your OP didn't state any of those ... [snip!] ... details are not provided. If that it the case, I'd advise looking into some local resources for victims of DV. Good luck."</blockquote>




Not borrowing, taking against her wishes. I don't know how you read anything she said previously and not think he's an abusive prick..
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I have 1 child & live in Indianapolis, Indiana
posted 6th Feb
Quoting That-Girl:" Then he sounds like a jerk and probably an abusive one at that. Your OP didn't state any of those ... [snip!] ... details are not provided. If that it the case, I'd advise looking into some local resources for victims of DV. Good luck."

Actually she did state that he leaves her no money so she can't go anywhere, that he doesnt let her leave without him, ect. ect. its your resposibility as a replier to read whats going on before you put your two cents in and come out looking like a moron after everything was previously stated. And I'm a little bit disturbed that you're a social worker and claiming to know anything about domestice violence if you can't see these red flags that EVERYONE else saw but you.
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I have 2 kids & live in Pennsylvania
posted 6th Feb
Quoting That-Girl:" I have been on this site for years, but thanks. Quite frankly, it is the poster's responsibility to provide additional details and backstory."

Which if you would have actually READ the thread you would see that is exactly what she did. It doesn't matter how long you have been here if you don't know how to properly read and understand how these threads work. OP's can't post all the back-story in the first post or no one would read it. It would be crazy long. It's just like a conversations. If someone just kept giving out all these facts and wouldn't let the other person ask questions or give advice it would be pointless.
We all asked certain questions, that lead 99% of the women in this thread to conclude that OP's husband is a complete control freak with abuse issues.
How is it that all of us were agreeing that he has some major issues but info provided.
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I have 1 child & live in Beach Haven, New Jersey
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